Very Sad

[wooforever]

Well this saturday night or early sunday morning, my best friend husband left her. They have been having problems for a while or at least I noticed it. He told her that he had found someone else and the marriage was over they were married for 20 years. I stayed the weekend and do not know what to do for her. It has not hit her that he is not going to be married to her anymore. I am friends with both of them and they helped me out thru two divorces and bought me a new car. I do not know what to do for them. I am lost, I do not know how to help my friend.

Her husband has thought about this for a very long time. He has figured out that she can make it on her own, the house will be hers and she can afford to keep making the payments, but for the last 20 years he has taken care of everything. He loves her but not in love with her and he has not been for a very long time. I do not know how to tell her that it was not her and the other woman did have anything to do with the split.

I just do not know what to do. Any advice.

[51anna]

Just be there for you friend and let her know that you care.

[Paulie]

yep what Anna said. Listen to her and hold her when she needs is. You said you are friends with both of them......it is up to them to talk when they are ready.

[1963comet]

Sorry to hear this about your friend. I have a family member just just went through this a year ago. 20 years is along time to be with someone. The courts awarded her alimony.

[daffodil75]

These are going to be low times for your friend. She probably just needs your nonjudgemental support and upbeat attitude when she's ready to see the brighter side of things...

[indigo]

Yes what Anna and Paulie said....be there for her she's going to need a friend.

[BUTTERFLY-7]

about your friends situation I could Identified with what she is going through, when I first arrive to S.R. I only had a few weeks married and I had decided to surrender and just when I was trying to do the right thing he leaves me for 2 weeks it was the most devastating 2 weeks of my life, before married we where together for one year and 3 month, then we got married in 1-30-008. I could Identified when you said that you think that it hasn't hit her, that he ain't coming back, or want to be with her,well I when through that, the second week was that I realize that this was really happening to me and Honey let me tell you something when all that hits you in one shot it fells like a local motor hitting you at one time, so my advice to you, be there for her with out you loosing your self in the process, just be there for her we don't have the cure only time could heal old, and new wounds, but we have the dosage allot of Love,Support,&Patience,understanding,tolerance, and the one but least Faith.

[wooforever]

Thank you all for the advise. I will be there for her, I have been divorced twice, I know how the drill is, but it is just hard.

[BUTTERFLY-7]

Originally Posted by wooforever

Thank you all for the advise. I will be there for her, I have been divorced twice, I know how the drill is, but it is just hard.

I know woofrever, But see it as a mission of God to you in your Life, its hard because as Humans we feel the pain of others and ours, it Hurts But Pain, and sorrow, are instruments the Almighty uses to make us Grow, and shine like Gold, I know its Hard to comprehend, But Just trust, God wont give us enough that we cant handle,the Heavens are Depending on you,Bless& B-Bless.