New Here

[IF ME GAL]

Hi, This is my first day on line with a recovery group. I have been sober for 6 days. My daughter confronted my drinking 6 days ago. I never thought I would be the center of an intervention. I had been sober for 10 years when I went back to drinking. The time before I was sober for 11 years. I have gotten sober to raise my kids. I have gotten sober to save my marriage. Now I need to do this for myself and hopefully for the last time before I die. I have a life expectancy of another 40yrs. I hope.
Alcohol is my drug of choice. I am married thiry three years my husband and I have been dealing with the loss of my son who died 7yrs. ago. It has brought us together in some ways and driven us apart in others. My two other children are grown. I have a wonderful 1yr old granddaughter.
I identify with the writer who said it was a white knuckle journey to reach thirty days. I am sorry I don't remember your name, I will do better in the future.

Grateful for someone to listen to me.

[2stop]

I am so glad you are here! I know this so very hard. I just now went to the kitchen and was looking for something in a kitchen drawer and the thought hit my brainwaves that I might have left a fentanyl patch in there, so I emptied the whole drawer and was on a drug search like the DEA with no constitutional rights to worry about!!! I swear sometimes I need a restraining order against myself! I am almost to 30 days and I want to make it so bad. This site is a Godsend and I hope you will make yourself at home and feel free to post as much as you'd like. Everyone here is so supportive and nonjudgmental. I hope to get to know you better, so come on in and here's a virtual cup of
{{{{COFFEE}}}}} for ya! How much cream and sugar?

Many hugs and hope too,
Tammie

[Paulie]

Hi and welcome -

6 days - great job!!!

You said you were sober in the past for long periods of time, so what changed? did you do something different?

SR is a great place for friendship and support. It is a great addition to my recovery program and I am sure it will be for yours too.

I look forward to getting to know you better and I am really glad you found us.

[IF ME GAL]

2stop don't do it . I have been on the computer all day to suppress the urge to drink. My husband has enough booze in the cellar to stock two bar rooms, he was suppose to remove it from the house but he hasn't gotten around to getting the boxes. It is a very hard thing to do.
Please don't use, Iwill pray for you.

[2stop]

Thank you and I am praying for you too, here's my hand--we'll do it together.

Hugz,
Tammie

[IF ME GAL]

Pauline, Why did I go out again and again. I think it is when I am going a period of loneliness that reminds of my childhood. If I could only be concious of it at the time. Loneliness has been such apart of my life and depression. First time I went out after ten years of sobriety. my sister called me about her memeories of abuse and a flood gate of feelings I had never dealt overcame me. I went to old friend alcohol. After awhile I went into therapy and to AA and became sober. The second time I had lost my son in a fire. My husband and I were grieving differently I was feeling very lonelyand again my old friend came to the rescue. But not really because once you have accepted that you have a problem you can't really ever deny it again. So since I was a blackout drinker, I would force myself to remember every detail of conversations, televisionshows to try to prove to myself that I was okay. In the last few months I knew I was losing control again. My son's anniversary was the end of May. So I said June 1 is the date I made it 2 days then drank again. I am so grateful to my daughter for confronting me in a very loving way.
RoseAnn

[Paulie]

RoseAnn -

First let me say, that I am sorry for the loss of your son. I cannot imagine the pain that a parent must go through losing a child.

We know what works and we know what doesn't work. Now I understand that does not always make things easy, but together, with fellowship and the 12 steps we can get through it.

have you been to a meeting yet? okay you know what I am going to say next...if you have not been to one...get to one.

Step work right now will be so good for you, really it will. I have been affectionately called the AA thumper around here...so here I go ...thump thump thump.

You can do this RoseAnn, you have done it before and YOU CAN do it again. You have even more support than before, cause now you have us here at SR, and let me tell you, we don't give up or go away easily.

(((RoseAnn))) sending you hugs and putting my hand out for you to hold too.

[Chy]

RoseAnn,

Welcome to SR. I know your gonna find the strength and courage to get through this rough time. Many of us here have and are in your shoes. I know you have had some sober time and that is awesome! You can't dwell on what you had just try to get it back.

We all are here for you be strong woman!