Soberwolf

Saddened by this word, people say it is part if recovery ? Recovering is part of recovery abstinence is part of recovering I am petrified this could happen I am strong and never want to drink again of that Im sure. Like i honestly know I can't drink and when I hear of ppl 2 years+ relapsing I have trouble understanding, we know why were sober why would anyone throw it away to do it all over again (and that's if they come back and I don't mean AA I mean actually wanting to get sober again or worse still death ! It is a big friend of alcoholics so relapse is just not an option. phoning people helps, punching the crap out of a punch bag helps with stress running and reading helps to exhaust the mind that is tired yet doesn't want to sleep and there are mts and there is now this place (for me this is amazing)

Which wolf wins ?

Dee74

Hi SoberWolf

Relapse is a part of my addiction, not my recovery

I can't tell you why people go back after years, but I can tell you how an all day every day drinker like me stays sober and has done for 7 years - I work at my recovery, daily, I make decisions based on my recovery, and never take it for granted.

I've had a rough time recently. I never thought of drinking...not once. That's a bonafide miracle right there


Feed that good wolf, and starve the bad one
Relapse is not inevitable....not by a long shot

D

Soberwolf

Thank you dee that made a load of sense 'not part of recovery, part of addiction' congrats on 7 years and not wanting to drink in rough waters I've been sailing recently as well all stuff out my control and just rolling with the waves

Sometimes I laugh sometimes I wanna cry all aboard the good ship sobriety

Dee74

As long as we make it through those rough seas into the harbour, it's all good soberwolf

Plenty of willing hands here for support too

Soberwolf

Thank you dee

grtgrandpa

Soberwolf, I agree with Dee74.

I have been living in recovery for 28 years without a slip.

When I came home from my first AA meeting, I told my wife, "those people are just like me". I identified in.

I have observed that slippers say I am not like those people in AA, they identify out, don't come back, and keep on drinking alcohol.

I hope soberwolf that you are one of us because we stay sober.

Soberwolf

After admitting I had a problem I tried aa and for 3 Months I was relapsing constantly and then I stopped going decided I had to do something and really went for it and here I am. After 90 days I ironically went to an aa mtn as soon as I got there I seen somebody I knew and he said here again ? I said yeah but this time I'm 90 days sober and after that I started going again and the more I went to the more something didn't feel right with it so i decided to start a tea service and that felt good just helping but then at other mtns I started noticing things that clashed with what I was doing ie handing it over and the programme itself

I picked up my 8+9 months chips but didn't feel right as I wasn't doing a programme and then I left aa as I knew what i had to do. I didn't pick up a yr chip yet a friend from aa has one rang me when I reached a year and said I want you to have mine it almost made me cry and I still have a sponser who is just there for me when I don't understand something he saved my life. I have excelled (sorry no ego but my life has turned around) I have just passed a plastering course and a lv2diploma in floorlayoing and am about to get trained up with cross rail for their numerous tunnelling projects which I am excited aboy . me and my wife just celebrated our 14yr anniversary I'm 32 and I'm happy in touch with family trusted again

So glad I stopped drinking, I do things like writing journal on my 3rd a4 pad about how I feel I write how long its been could I have handled things better like a daily reflection but nowadays its getting less

I have no intention to ever drink again in my life I know what will happen if I do and I am never going through that hell again

Soberwolf

After admitting I had a problem I tried aa and for 3 Months I was relapsing constantly and then I stopped going decided I had to do something and really went for it and here I am. After 90 days I ironically went to an aa mtn as soon as I got there I seen somebody I knew and he said here again ? I said yeah but this time I'm 90 days sober and after that I started going again and the more I went to the more something didn't feel right with it so i decided to start a tea service and that felt good just helping but then at other mtns I started noticing things that clashed with what I was doing ie handing it over and the programme itself

I picked up my 8+9 months chips but didn't feel right as I wasn't doing a programme and then I left aa as I knew what i had to do. I didn't pick up a yr chip yet a friend from aa has one rang me when I reached a year and said I want you to have mine it almost made me cry and I still have a sponser who is just there for me when I don't understand something he saved my life. I have excelled (sorry no ego but my life has turned around) I have just passed a plastering course and a lv2 diploma in floorlayoing and am about to get trained up with cross rail for their numerous tunnelling projects which I am excited about. me and my wife just celebrated our 14yr anniversary and back in touch with family.

So glad I stopped drinking, I do things like writing journal on my 3rd a4 pad about how I feel I write how long its been could I have handled things better like a daily reflection but nowadays its getting less

I have no intention to ever drink again in my life I know what will happen if I do and I am never going through that hell again

But to answer your question it was aa that let me know I wasn't alone with it

I do what I must to be sober don't like ppl thinking I'm slipping nothing could be further from the truth

I got sober on my own in the end and I'm not going to feel bad for getting sober

Fly N Buy

listen to the guy who relapses.....( or read their story/reasons). This helps keeps me sober and was told to me not too long ago.

Recovery is a gift - each time someone chooses to relapse, that gift slowly disappears and their spirit continues to deflate.

There are zero guarantees the gift will every return. I guard my gift jealously and never let anyone play with it! They can look at it, but do not touch!!

Soberwolf

Dee made me realise relapse is part of addiction not part of recovery and that was it for me made a ton of sense thank you again dee

grtgrandpa

congratulations soberwolf for your desire not to drink alcohol which has achieved a number of months without alcohol in your body. If what you are doing is getting you what you want, then keep on doing it, and thank you for sharing your story with us.

Soberwolf

It is not a desire anymore it's a passion lol i desired to stop drinking alcohol I have achieved that, to stay sober is a choice it really is simple for me now drink = hell on earth sober = earth

I have heard and been called a dry drunk but I hate alcohol and I swear you could offer me 100 million I wouldn't drink because I really don't know if Id ever come back I whole heartedly mean that
From the moment I said I had a problem it took me 3 months to get where I am my first long term/short term sobriety is now and forever I try telling ppl that but they try telling me something else

I will never drink again you know why because I'll always have a choice and I will always choose not to

fortheloveof

How does one define the time? The day? The hour? Was it when I fell asleep after my last joint and drink last night? When I woke up at 4 am and said %*** This?

All I can think about is when he lights one up or cracks open a beer, How can I stop what is predictable?

I am weak, I am scared about the day, this day.

It is now 5:51 am and I ask, How long have I been sober?

Dee74

Hi fortheloveof

I wouldn't get too caught up in the numbers. It's not a competition by any means
It's about not living in addiction

If you're feeling vulnerable and you're beset by temptation why not beef up your support? - post in Newcomers forum, check out the Class of October support thread...join the 24 hour Recovery connections thread to commit to 24 hours sobriety today?

Have you thought of real life support like AA or some other group at all?

D

fortheloveof

I went to a few AA places before, It is not for me.

Dee74

I just read your other post.

AA's not the only game in town

There's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players, including but not limited to AA:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

D

anattaboy

I've seen more than 1 20+ yr. coinholder relapse and I did after 8. Looking back I'd say there were at least 2 months of me getting chummy with my AV.

ClubMedGrad

I don't think there is any rational way to understand what someone is thinking when they go back out after 2+ years, because you're not dealing with someone who is acting rationally.

It may sound like a cop-out to say that it's the disease, but it IS the disease.

Apparently someone wasn't being vigilant about their disease and it got them in its grip again.

It wasn't that long ago that the AA Daily Reflection was about vigilance.

I'm thinking of having the word tattooed on the inside of my ankle.

brad13

had my own, no excuses i just slipped

Fly N Buy

Being an old drunk I have heard the good, bad and ugly about relapse - as others have. What I have taken away from people whose opinions I respect;

In the back of many peoples minds, there's a thought - someday, maybe I will drink again - down the road. That has to be cast out......

Fear / anxiety over losing sobriety is humility = good! Keeps us ever more vigilant!

Finally, from an SR friend who has some wisdom......50 tips for staying sober!!
Yep, you! I say sober wolf wins these battles hand down!!


fly