zanabanana

Hello everyone out there who suffers from alcoholism-- men and women. I haven't posted on here in a long time and I'm starting to realize I should have a lot more.

I'm 27 years old, going to be 28 by the end of the year. I've been suffering from alcoholism (my addition) and depression since I was 25. I've never been in trouble with the law. Ever. Until I got in trouble nearly back to back with DUIs. My first one I received in early December 2013 and my licenses was suspended for six months. I followed the law and did not drive until I received my privilege to drive again in early June 2014. Finally, my life was coming together again after a horrible summer last year where my depression took over, and my addiction took hold of me and wouldn't let me go. I was finally happy again this June when I received my licenses again and my freedom back. However, I got in trouble again. Just two days ago in a different county where I live. I couldn't believe my idiocy. And of course we all say that the day after we make the mistake. I got pulled over again for a DUI. I'm just scared out of my mind on what's going to happen to me. I was almost done with the first DUI, and here I go again and do it all over again.

So, my question is.... has this ever happened to anyone before? I take full responsibility for my actions. Since these two DUIs happened in different counties, I don't know what will happen. Does anyone have advice for me? I'm just scared out of my wits, and I am so down on myself that I wasn't smarter than the alcohol.

Advice, please? Thank you.

Dee74

Welcome back Zanabanana

No advice on the DUIs, but there's a bigger issue here really isn't there?
What are you doing about your alcoholism?

D

least

Glad you're back and wanting to solve this problem. Are there AA meetings where you are? I'd suggest going to some meetings and asking them for help in quitting drinking. Lots of experience in those rooms.

zanabanana

Dee74 and least.... yes, there is more to the story. I have a heavy addiction to alcohol. I did attend 36 weeks, 3 days a week addiction classes but I don't feel they were really benefiting me. We were talking about all kinds of addictions. I need more of the focus to be on alcoholism.

Yes, here in Indiana, we do have AA meetings at any time of the day. What I need is a sponsor who will be able to help me during the rough times. Like today for example, I was sitting in my car during my lunch hour and all I wanted to do was drink. Of course, I didn't. I swear on everything I have I did not drink. I just sat in my car, thinking... "Hmm... what did I use to do before the alcohol took over?" I've lost myself. That's how I can describe it.

Cleomie

I'm reading a really good book called Kicking the Drink... Easily and it is giving me a new perspective on alcohol. Worth a look.
And good luck to you.

J2911

Who is the author of "kicking the drink"?

Cleomie

It's called Kick the Drink... Easily
By Jason Vale

LastMistake

It sucks that sometimes we make the same mistakes over and over before we address the real problem. I read some really horrible statistics today that less than 1% of all drunk drivers are pulled over and that on average they drive drunk 80 times before they are caught. It's a mistake I've made too many times and I am thankful that I never hurt anyone. The feeling of getting home without realizing what roads you drove, how long you were driving, it makes me sick.

Its all too easy to get really down on yourself, and become anxious with those "what if's." I know today I barely had the energy to get out of bed or eat. I'm happy I was able to find this community to connect with.

The truth is if I hadn't been pulled over I may have never stopped to realize that the problem was the drinking all along. I'm lucky to be learning this lesson now when nobody got hurt than too late with far worse consequences.

Soberwolf

I remember getting arrested all because I wanted a drink

Rang my sponser and it went like this

ME: I had a drink got arrested thrown in the cells I'm out now do you fancy a cup of tea ?

SPONSER: Pardon? You drunk got arrested and now what to have tea no way I'm not coming to wipe your arse I was like wow something happened right there for me !!

ME: what do I do ? Should I apologise to neighbours etc ?

SPONSER: they might not be ready and maybe never at all

There was a bit more but the message was clear and it saved my life I was looking for someone to clean up my mess I never made contact beforehand which I now always do

But it came down on me what did I want ? I wanted to be normal I didn't want to drink it went on for 3 months before iI knew what I had to do

My SPONSER said some people have to go through so much before they finally realise

I consider this guy as very important in my life I must drive him up the wall at times but he's a good guy and wants to see me happy I sent him a text today just saying thank you again as he means a lot to me

I should point out we only know of the each other's alcoholism and we don't know much else but everything comes with time

Lucie29

I'm currently reading the Jason Vale book as well... It has been very helpful and given me a lot to consider about how I view this disease. I am not yet finished, but would already recommend it to anyone who drinks alcohol.

allhope4all

Hi you are just like us all as we try to become new all hell breaks loose....I hope u are in a good Church home and surrounded by others who are living as God would have us,,we are strong but will not be when around the wrong crowd...go through this because it will help u to be better,,, if u truly take have taken full responsibility of DUI.....not the just the drinking while driving part...but the entire affect(s) of DUI.....alcohol can and will cause ??


Truth hurts but as YOU begin to come to it....YOU will be free

Nocturnal

My second and last dui was in Alaska and it was 6 hrs after they passed the law for second dui is possible 1-5 yrs in jail well I was 19 I believe and I tried out running this condominium security guard that saw me in his parking lot taking a drink in the drivers seat of my jeep I cut the corner to close ran into the corner of a building knocking a hole in a little girls bedroom right above where she was sleeping well my attorney sayed the magistrate was not giving me any breaks and they were probably going to make a example of me because I could've killed that little girl , I was born and raised a Christian and while I was sitting in jail I prayed to God and promised him if he'd get me out of this I wouldn't drive a car again, the parents of the little girl are Christians also and because of my age they asked the judge for leniency , they said if I spent 5 yrs in jail i would probably just come out a hardened criminal , the judge gave me 3 mo. In a halfway house with 6 mo. Community service the power of God is just amazing I haven't driven a car for 20 yrs. And dont miss a thing about it as a matter of fact because i've been riding a bike eveywhere im in pretty good shape for a 20 yr drinker and smoker now its time for me to quit the drinking for good.