Expectation's

Because you're not what I would have you be, I blind myself to who, in truth, you are.
--Madeleine L'Engle

Sometimes we expect far too much of the people around us, and because no one can ever live up to those expectations, we are almost always disappointed. But wouldn't it be better if we just let go, and let people be who they are? Then we'd be able to see them as they are--with all their beauty and goodness in which we take joy, and with all their faults which we can also see in ourselves.

When we have put someone up on a pedestal, sculpturing them to fit our needs and desires by smoothing out the rough edges and creating new curves here and there, we cannot see the real person underneath our work. All we see is the illusion we have created. That is denying the person's real identity and is disrespectful. It's much better for our friends and for ourselves if we drop our expectations and illusions, and accept them all just the way they are.

What unfair expectations do I have of others?

[exzim]

Thank you Doug. I need this for the holidays!

[Gabe]

Originally Posted by Doug

All we see is the illusion we have created. That is denying the person's real identity and is disrespectful.

Beautiful.

[Ann]

Then we'd be able to see them as they are--with all their beauty and goodness in which we take joy, and with all their faults which we can also see in ourselves.

Accepting people for who they are, good side and bad, helps me release any expectations I may have based on who I would like them to be.

Hugs
Ann

[Paulie]

WOW - I was just talking about this earlier this morning.

Thanks Doug.

I like to tell myself I don't have expections...but I do.

[Dan]

That post reminded me of another thing you posted recently Doug...

Originally Posted by Doug

If only I could throw away the urge to trace my patterns in your heart I could really see you.
--David Brandon

I like this exploration of who I am, now that I'm in recovery.
Thanks for being but one of the sources of fuel for the journey.