Daughter of an alcoholic

Hi! I don't know if much of you remember me..but I was here a very long time ago. I told you about my next door neighbor trying to kiss me, and about my mother. For those who don't know me let me fill you in.
Neighbor: A while ago, I considered this guy my friend, because he was my older brother's friend. This guy is probably...23 now, but he was 22 when it happened. He called me over one day when I was getting the mail. I went, and he tried to kiss me...I'm only 12, which I guess I shouldn't have lied about my age to get on here, but I was kinda in need of talking on here. But being 12 and having a 22 year old guy trying to kiss you is pretty scary you know? Well this big fiasco happened and I told my brother. I was crying so hard, after I told him. I didn't want him to tell anyone else, I don't know why i didn't want him too, but I just didn't. Him being the brother that he is, told my dad. Nobody told my mom until later, because she's crazy when she's drunk, which she is all the time. She tried to go after the guy with a broom handle of all things I'm serious. It was a funny sight, but not at the time. The cops had to take her in for being publicly drunk, but the guy totally said he didn't do anything so he was let go. That kinda got me mad that they didn't do anything about him...he's the one who did the crime not me. They said i shouldn't have gone over there...but he was my friend (or used to be....)
Mother:
My mom is drunk...aaaaal the time....she never stops. She drink like two bottles of wine every night. Then she starts arguing with my dad, makes things up. Like she'll say that my dad has an affair with another man : I think that's absolutely sick. But most of the fights happened with my brother when he was still living here. My mom would hit him, he'd throw her on to the floor..etc.etc. I thought ti was sad. I didn't know WHO to side with you know...both of them I loved (used to). But when my brother left, she went after me and my dad. She'd call me a ****, hoe, bitch..anything she could think of. She'd slap me and push me onto the ground. And then she'd do the same stuff to my dad. one night we were out dirtbike riding...we were out in the middle of no where so no cops could come and help us right? Well she kept turning off the generator on th motorhome..which we needed to charge the battery up. But anyway she was really drunk off her butt.I pushed her out of the way, or else we'd be stranded out in the desert. She didn't understand. Once she pushed me into the counter...my head hit it, and I went unconcious for like 5 min. OMG I woke up and I was shaking soooo bad that I thought I wouldn't be able to stand up ever again. My dad was sooo mad after that. He wouldn't let her near me. She goes to AA meetings now, by court order.....but she never pays attention. She attends them, puts in her card, and goes out to smoke a cigarette the whole time...It's just not right. I've had to go with her once...that's how I know. I paid attention....because I want her to stop. I want her to stop so bad it hurts.I can't stand it....My dad's thinking of getting a divorce with her, but we don't really have the money right now. And with Christmas so close, I'm worried.


I just needed to talk...but I love yall and thank you for listening....thank you


Heather dutton

[2dayzmuse]

Hi Heather,
I'm sorry things aren't going as well as they could be. I remember when your first came here and told us about your problems. I think you were going to give Alateen a try. I was wondering how that is going? I hope things get better with your and your parents. It's sounds as if things have been kind of a bummer lately. Sometimes grownups don't act very grownup. No matter how bad things get at home, you can always find support at Alateen. Good luck Heather and have a very Merry Christmas. Keep coming back and letting us know how your doing. Take care of yourself.

[thanx2methodone]

Hey heather,
I totally know how you feel...my mom drinks aalll the time also, so much so that i dread christmas because of it (cause there is way too much booze around)
I don't really know what to tell you, other than if you can get out of there, i'd advise it. My mom hasn't stopped, and we have tried EVERYTHING! she still refuses that she has a problem. So i really can't tell you that it will get any better, but remeber--you have to look out for yourself!! Stop trying to fix your mom and her problem, and worry about yourself and your safety.

Good luck to you,
pls. let me know how you are doing...

[nodope]

Oh sweetie......I'm so sorry you are going through this.

I will listen anytime. There are so many wonderful people here who are very helpful.

[51anna]

Heather,

I'm so sorry you're in such an awful position and it seems like you have no adults who are helping you out. That is just terrible.

I agree that Alateen could give you some support and help you to feel like you are not alone. Also, I would suggest that you call the police each and every time that you feel threatened by someone - don't let it go by - make a call. They will come and they will assess your situation. You could also consider calling Child Protective Services yourself and tell them about your situation and ask their advice. Your main priority has to be yourself. Do whatever it takes to take care of you.

You can PM me anytime you like.

Love, Anna

[nutz]

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going thur, Heather.
Don't blame yourself for something you don't have control over of.
It's not your fault that your mother is an alki.

Try to forgive your mother for the things she said and done to you.
You see....when you forgive someone, you're not doing it for the
other person. You're doing it for yourself. This way you don't
have to carry the guilt, shame, and pain for something that somebody
else done to you.

Remember that you're a child of God and that you are LOVED
no matter what. No matter what anybody say or do or don't do.

Try no to grow up so fast. BE a kid

[LynnieD]

I know right where you are coming from. I grew up in the same kind of home, and it is not easy. You need to make sure that you are safe, and that you can have someone to talk to. I attended alateen and they suggested to me that when the arguing and fighting get out of hand that I should call someone and go to thier house or just have someone to come pick me up and go for a ride. No one deserves to be abused by the A in thier family. I will keep you in my prayers.