Redmayne

For me, and in posting this I'd like to he\ar others views, otherwise what's the point? My recovery, first of all in my drinking days, spent as a high functioning alcoholic and now in recovery as a fully functioning person see Carl Rogers, defined as being someone who has lead a 'rich' full life of experiential learning knowing both great triumph and disaster in equal measure. Whilst still retaining the openness and enthusiasm for new experiences... It's a way of life!

In which, in an effort to make spiritual progress I have explored many things, often in philosophy primarily in both Stoic and Buddhist philosophy (the two compliment each other) and even in reading Richard Bach's books, spiritual philosophy found in, for example 'Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah' et al..

Notwithstanding the philosophy and practice of the lessons learned from the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous' with the assistance of 'Joe & Charlie's: Big Book Study Meeting'.

Taking great heed of the words on p. 275 in the personal story 'The Keys of the Kingdom' in the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous' 4th Ed. which says ' A.A. is not a plan for recovery that can be finished and done with. It is a way of life, and the challenge contained in its principles is enough to keep any human striving for as long as he lives.'

Which of itself,without the addition of my other interests suggest that my efforts aren't in vain...

Of course we are all, I hope, aware of the maxim,'Live and let live' so it's best to keep an open mind in these matters, best approached in a relaxed, philosophical manner similar to my interpretation of the words in 'The Serenity Prayer' on which basis I'm always open to others sharing their experience, strength and hope by way of constructive comment or criticism...

RDBplus3

Thanks for the post, Redmayne.

Joe & Charlie's Big Book Study is an important series of Speaker Messages that helped me immensely in understanding and practical application of the AA Big Book, and working the 12 Steps.

Also important for me, is the personal application of the Serenity Prayer, the 3rd Step Prayer, and the 11th Step Prayer (the St Frances Prayer).

I appreciate your posts, with your application of various philosophies, quotes, readings, etc, to enhance our sometimes seemingly 'mundane' lives. It reminds me, "it is for Freedom we have been set Free"... Free to pursue beyond letting our lives be 'mundane'.

I also, would like to hear feedback from others in this Sober Community, about working out their lives ... getting Free, and being Free.

RDBplus3 ... Happy, Joyous and FREE.

Redmayne

Thanks for that, both interesting and informative to which, in gratitude I'll respond with this,

'The time assigned to us is limited. If you do not use it to free yourself, it is gone and never returns,' - Marcus Aurelius

Sasha4

The time assigned to us is limited. If you do not use it to free yourself, it is gone and never returns,' - Marcus Aurelius

This is very insightful for me Red.
Alcohol is a prison I believe.
It becomes like groundhog day - at least for me anyway.

The years spent drinking and regretting can never be reclaimed.
A future without drinking is often feared as dull, boring, not worth while.
However it is anything but that.

Redmayne

Thank you for an excellent,articulate and intelligent response that i'm sure benefited many, including myself...

zerothehero

Whether one calls it sobriety, sober living, recovery, or just being a teetotaler, it is a way of life. I know precious few people who don't drink, and now that I've been seeing a naturopath and dealing with some health issues via an entire protocol that includes dietary restrictions, I can hardly go out to eat. I'm an outsider, a stranger in a strange land...

To me the most important part of recovery is learning to embrace my emotional life, the pleasant and the unpleasant. Look at the newcomers threads and you'll see folks tempted to drink because of how they feel due to life's many problems. Developing the courage to face life head on to me is the central issue. Not having a bottle to crawl into leaves us exposed and vulnerable.

I keep getting deeper into Shambhala/Buddhist practice. I am a warrior. Health living is courageous living. Fearlessness is essential to moving forward.

Redmayne

Great post, thank you...it reminded me of this from R.A.Heinlein's book,'Stranger in a strange land' about the adventures of Michael Valentine Smith,

'Once I served humanity and the thought of that pleased me. Then I realised society does not want this, in fact it consciously rejects it. So now I do what pleases.'

As you are a warrior, so am I and afford you equal, deserved respect...

zerothehero

Thanks, man. Except for those who remain in prisons of their own making, we are all warriors.

Redmayne

'Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.'

'Begin at once to live, and count each day as a separate life.' - Seneca


'You have power over your mind, not outside events.

Realize this, and you will find strength.' - Marcus Aurelius

Wholesome

I've been reading about Stoicism and it does have a lot of similarities to Buddhism. I like the idea of turning a negative into a positive and creating opportunities out of obstacles. I've been doing that recently regarding my hours being cut back for the summer, instead of seeing that as a bad thing I've been using those hours to teach myself a new skill so I can get a job in the future where I don't have to worry about hard times like I do now. Something I would not be doing if I was drinking.... all I would do is talk about doing it.

So much of life really is about how you choose to frame things in the mind and persevere and adapt. People can get so focused on the negative and get themselves trapped in thought/ behaviour loops. It's much easier to accept that things are always changing and evolving, nothing is permanent.

August252015

This is from my latest blog post, coming forward about my alcoholism as I have taken leadership of a restaurant industry recovery group (non-AA) in Atlanta:

"I work a daily recovery program. It is a living, breathing entity that is my worldview, my bastion of hope, my strength in numbers. Part of it is spiritual, and part of it is learning; my lifelong agility at research and study, reading and questioning, serve me well in both areas. Part of it is tactical; I take physical steps and use emotional and rational tools to not only stay sober, but to live my own best life.

When I was a child, I would not have described the life I have now as the most perfect and fitting one I could imagine. Today, I would. My years of experiences – good and bad, related to drinking and not- along with my alcoholism….are part and parcel to this life.

Acceptance is the companion word to “done.” A new freedom and a new peace, and the ability to handle situations that used to baffle me – these are just some of the things I have discovered since I quit drinking over 14 months ago. I consider myself young in recovery and the only finish line I envision is to die sober.

This blog, and my newfound mission working with a restaurant industry recovery group called Ben’s Friends, are two ways I intend to use my experience to benefit others. I know there are tweets, Facebook and Instagram posts, discussions with others, and other outlets I don’t even know of yet in my future. From a place where I was underweight, malnourished, and on the brink of cirrhosis, today finds my tummy rounder, my health restored, and my energy high. This is the place where my strength arises, as my heart and mind are hopeful about my future. From a place where I felt alone, defeated and fatally wounded, today I am beloved by one precious man, embraced by family and friends, and privileged to have a place in this wide world. Perfection has no place in my world, and acceptance of whatever challenges and sadness life will bring is absolutely required. Trust and hope, faith and persistence, knowledge and humility – these are the things I will need to keep close and live out as I go through the rest of my one wild and precious life.

That is what I have found after admitting to that one word and that one adjective. This is what my alcoholism has brought me."

Redmayne

A terrific post thank you and my wishes for every success for the future, wherever it may take you

My sobriety date, a day at a time extends back to Feb., 15th 2008. The night before I nearly died from drinking, so let's not get to clever about this...

Even now I still think, metaphorically speaking I haven't put the drink down. Not that I'm tempted by alcohol, but more I'm aare by small things i.e. little, unexpected acts of kindness towards me that didn't exist in my drinking days, that have the tears flooding down my tears.

I can handle 'the big stuff' without to much problem, it's the little things that 'sneak under my radar that'll get me every time. Yes, I know I'm a 'big softie' but woud you have me any other way?