Looking for some honest answers....

[FosterFamily]

Hi there....

Well I guess I pretty much gave it away in my online name. My husband and I are newly licensed foster parents, and I guess I am on here hoping to get some honest answers about heroine addiction.

We were just placed with a beautiful new born baby boy who's mother is in prison for heroine possession. This is her third or fourth time in prison/jail. We are not sure of the other drug charges, but also know that she has been in jail for prostitution. She is only 23 and as far as we know this is her first live birth. We too know that she used for the first four months of the pregnancy before she was reinstitutionalized.

I feel so much for her and for this baby. I can not imagine what must have happened in her life to lead her to this place.... anyway...

She is due to be released at the end of May. We know that she plans on entering a rehab facility where she can, so we are told, take the baby with her. From what we have been able to find out this facility is a short term treatment.. 30 days or less.

I guess my question is... does she really stand a chance if this is all the treatment she is getting? Does this baby stand a chance? I can't bear to think of what might happen to her let alone the baby.

I would appreciate any of your thoughts, and honest answers. I don't know there is much we can do for her, for right now her baby is being well taken care of, and maybe that is all we can offer.

Thanks in advance.

[best]

Sad part about foster care.... You need to let them go no matter what you think may be in the future.
I would say the best you can do is stay connected with the children's services office. Share your thoughts with them and let them know you are able and willing to care for the child as long as need be.
Foster parenting is giving the child the best you can, while you can.
It isn't something every one can do because there comes a time you need let them go.(even if you don't agree)

[Buzz Kilowatt]

Sad story.

People do quit heroin successfully. But they have to want to. REALLY want to.

There might be a glimmer of hope if she admitted herself to rehab, but it sounds more likely that it was a court order. I hope I'm wrong. Maybe a mother's love for her child would compel her to quit.

Addicts have one priority, and that is getting and using their drug of choice. Everything else is secondary.

To conclude, if the mother has a successful recovery and is committed to sobriety the chances are way better for both than if she relapses.

An overdose would be tragic to both parties.

A prayer for you and this little child.

- Buzz

[Peter]

Oh boy.

Welcome FF.Yes she really stands a chance. 30 days is more than enough for her to sober up to realize what has happened and to make some sensible decisions.

We can only hope and pray that her baby will help to provide her with enough motivation to stay clean.

[Done-With-It]

Hey there,

I'm sorry for your situation. God love people like you. You are a blessing.
I'd say Yes, it's possible if she wants it. Like the others said it just depends
on how bad she wants it.

I was able to stop doing meth on my own. No rehab or anything. One of the
hardest things I've ever done, it still is every day. But I wanted to quit so badly.
She has enough time in 30 days to realize that she 'Can' live without the drug.
In a perfect world she'd get a lot more than 30 days, but it is doable imho.

You are an Angel!~~~

[golf99]

She has been locked up for sometime, right? That along with the 30 day program should be a good amount of sobriety, right?

People sometimes fall, I'm sure the State would not release the baby if the Mother is using drugs.

You've done all you can do.



Best,

Golf

[mf2881]

actually golf, whats sad is the state can give her the baby, and then she can start using again. i have a crack addicted cousin who is living proof of that. she has a beautiful 4 year old daughter that is around the drugs and it is so sad.

anyway, foster, you never know which time will be the last. maybe now that she has a newborn to care for, this will be it. but heroin is a very hard drug to quit... if this is her first time trying, it probably wont be the last. who knows though. it took my ex 5 tries before he got it and i still dont know if he will go back to it. just like everyone else said, she has to REALLY want it.

my advice would be to notify child services of the situation like someone else said... if she continues using, then hopefully she will lose the baby and someone else can raise her in a safe environment.

[mightycass]

Well, that's a tough story. To give you a little history, I'm a heroin addict and had been for nearly five years. As of now I've been 4 months clean and I too am also 23. I first want to commend you on what you are doing. I know what it's like to be down and out and need some help. But, to ask whether a 30 day treatment center will suffice? I can't say that I think it would. First, she has to WANT to quit. Second, she had to really hit rock bottom to get to that point. That is what had to happen to me. I got arrested and my whole life was turned upside down. I surely hope she can do it but don't think it's possible unless she really sees how what she is doing is going to change her, and in ways that she won't want. I've got a short story I wrote that explains some of how I feel about dope, and might explain how she feels. If you would like to read it let me know. Other than that, good luck. I really hope she can pull herself out of this.

[golf99]

actually golf, whats sad is the state can give her the baby, and then she can start using again. i have a crack addicted cousin who is living proof of that. she has a beautiful 4 year old daughter that is around the drugs and it is so sad.


True.

Sad indeed.