Today has been a struggle - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Hope · 03-26-2006, 06:17 PM

For some reason, crazy thoughts have come on strong.

I haven't acted on them, I just wish they would go away.

rose petals · 03-26-2006, 06:50 PM

hi hope--
im laura,alkie,--whats going on?i just got done watching joel olsteen--have you ever seen him?--the message was just about being in peace and knowing gods in control--stop struggling--go with the flow type stuff and it frees you--course hes much better at getting the point over --hes a minister and it was a great message--if there is anything i can do --let me know--im here
laura

**Peter** · 03-26-2006, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hope4life

I just wish they would go away.

....and go away they will. This too shall pass.......

aasharon90 · 03-26-2006, 07:45 PM

Hi I'm Sharon and Im an Alcoholic. I remember early on when i first got sober if thoughts poped into my head I would say the Serenity Prayer over and over again till I could feel it deep down within. Until I became calm. I also noticed that when i began sharing my ESH with someone else or went out to help someone then that would take the focus off of myself or get out of myself and think of another and their problems.
Today since i was by myself, I posted more times here than any other time. Even tho i didn't have any thoughts of drinking today, I spent most of my time sharing, thus didn't have much time for anything else. Glad ur here for me.

Thanks for letting me share. Love and care.

**Done-With-It** · 03-27-2006, 12:39 AM

Hey Hope,

What's goin on? How you doin now?

Hope · 03-27-2006, 01:35 PM

Day 27.

Doing better today... those crazy thoughts have subsided.
I feel tired and sluggish today. My head still feels like it is in a deep, thick fog. Still struggling with getting enough sleep. I could not go to sleep until 5 AM this morning. I just couldn't drift off to sleep last night. I got up at 10 AM.
Today, I decided to cut back on caffeine since I believe that is causing major anxiety and may be contributing to my insomnia. I usually drink sodas ALL day long. But, this morning, I only had 2 cups of coffee and I had a few caffeine-free drinks throughout the day. For me, being without caffeine is HARD!! I want a Diet Dr. Pepper, SERIOUSLY! I have a horrible headache caused by caffeine withdrawals...and I am missing that usual jolt that is provided by sodas..
I don't know if I can keep away from the sodas, but I thought that it may be worth a shot.

I got some L-Dopa extract vitamins today... I am gonna see if that helps some. I will definitely provide updates.

Oh HEY, I love the Easter smilies! They are AWESOME!

angelgirl · 03-27-2006, 07:49 PM

Hey Hope,,

Glad you are feeling a little better today. But I wanted to let you know that it is so important to taper yourself down off caffiene. Going off to quickly can be very hard on us.

I also wanted to let you know, incase you don't already know

there is an excellent thread going in the Mental Health forum on caffiene withdrawal. It really has some great info. and links. It would be great if you have time to check it out. The links are full of info.

Prayers,
Becky

Hope · 03-27-2006, 08:43 PM

Thanks Becky!

I think I cut back too much today because I started to feel sick by the afternoon and I became extremely sluggish even more than usual. Of course, the headaches were bad.

I did fairly well with cutting back today. It definitely wasn't easy by any means.

I drink sodas a lot of times just out of habit. LOL... but I decided to do everything that I can to better my health.

I will check that link out, Becky!

Cheryl

Hope · 03-27-2006, 08:48 PM

I know this sounds weird but I found some old ATM withdrawal slips from January when I was using and they just really messed with my head! I mean, I know it sounds crazy because they are just receipts but my mind was about to start thinking about that but ya know, I played that tape out and I remembered the pain. I said, NOPE, not today! Clean, sober, and very grateful!!

I think as I get more clean time some of these triggers will diminish. At least somewhat, maybe.

Just happy to be doing the sober dancing thing today! :bunny

**Phinneas** · 03-27-2006, 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hope4life

For some reason, crazy thoughts have come on strong.

I haven't acted on them, I just wish they would go away.

Cheryl, you've gotten some excellent advice so far. But what about that recovery prorgam you committed to work not so long ago? When are you going to meetings and how many a week? Do you have a sponsor? Do you call #s you get from women's meetings? Are you reading the BB and/or Basic Text? Are you working the steps? Are you avoiding people, places and things that trigger you?

In the BB there is a story about a man who is whistling in the dark. I'm ok, those monsters won't get me. But all the time, he is shaking in his boots because he knows that next drink or snort could come at any time.

Time to stop whistling in the dark, Cheryl, and get down to the real work of recovery.

Just my opinion. I don't mean to come down hard on you, but with your track record here, I think you need some honest, straight-forward suggestions.

We want you clean and sober, not dead.

((((...))))

Spungold49 · 03-28-2006, 12:28 AM

Phinneas ".....you've gotten some excellent advice so far. But what about that recovery prorgam you committed to work not so long ago? ...... are you going to meetings and how many a week? Do you have a sponsor? Do you call #s you get from women's meetings? Are you reading the BB and/or Basic Text? Are you working the steps? Are you avoiding people, places and things that trigger you?"

Hey. As strange as it may seem coming from a soul with a name that has "SPUN" in it, I agree with Phinneas. The reason is because we AD/AL 's are expert at the art of manipulation. We try to control our environment, maintain the status quo,{If everyone would just stay put while I figure this out}.... Because if we are stopped in our tracks
we have to face the truth about our addictions. {Everyone don't move on...wait..be here ..I know I can figure this out...I need more time....meetings will confuse me at this point...I have read the BB....This is on the subconcious level. But Carol, did you not get a jolt when you read P's reply? I did. Great advice, hard to swallow, but once done, stirs up something in that old donut hole.

Thoughts are thoughts. They seem more real than "real" events. I know. it will get better. To borrow from Peter:

....and go away they will. This too shall pass.......

Take care sweetie from a 7X around yoyo.

Hope · 03-28-2006, 10:58 AM

I've been working with my sponsor, going to 4/5 meetings a week, using phone numbers, and I am away from people, places, and things.

I have been working on my recovery and I'm not whistling in the dark.

I know I have a track record of relapse but it just seems that every time I have a bad day or I struggle a bit, everyone thinks that I am going to relapse.
I am almost scared these days to come and post anything about a bad day I'm having because I don't want to get anyone worried.

For me, using isn't even an option. The thoughts still come and go at times, but I haven't acted on them. I have 28 days clean and sober today I plan to continue adding my days up. I know that 28 days doesn't sound like a whole lot, but I have a lot of quality work in my days.

I have really been working on me this time.

I barely even see my family these days so I could put my recovery first. Outside of my AA and church family and SR, I am alone.

The choice that I have made for today is to stay clean and sober and that is the choice I will make when I wake up tomorrow.

I remember to say 'please' in the morning and 'thank you' at night. I know that things didn't get this bad overnight so it will probably take a while to get better. Easy does it.

My past is full of stormy days but I am commited to my sobriety. I have a hard enough time dealing with life while sober, I have no need of going back out to further complicated matters even more.

I have an NA Basic Text, AA Big Book, 12 Steps and 12 Traditions, plus lots of other recovery related material. I am always reading recovery stuff. Recovery is my life. I am recovering for my life.

There are bad days as well as the good, but my sobriety comes first.

I am really grateful that I have my friends at SR! Thanks for caring about me.

angelgirl · 03-28-2006, 12:17 PM

Quote:

I've been working with my sponsor, going to 4/5 meetings a week, using phone numbers, and I am away from people, places, and things.

I have been working on my recovery

WOO-HOO!! You go girl.. Maybe you just need a little encouragement.. I do at times, I think we all do at times. I also need a kick in the rear ence in a while, but not often, as I do that enough myself.

Quote:

For me, using isn't even an option. The thoughts still come and go at times, but I haven't acted on them. I have 28 days clean and sober today I plan to continue adding my days up.

This si when I truly believe that life changed for me. When I could say this. It isn't even an option for me anymore. I think there is alot of power in those words. I really do. We can have alot of crap in our lives, as most of us do, but that doesn't mean we are going to use.

Quote:

I know that 28 days doesn't sound like a whole lot, but I have a lot of quality work in my days.

28 days does sound like alot. Ask someone who has 27, or 26, 25, 24, 23,,,,,,10,,5,,3,2,1 or even 0!! Don't ever discount the number of days you have. Rejoice in the days you have, whether it's 2 or 202. Recovery is a wonderful thing, and a miracle given to us by god, with alot of work done by us. You know that though..

Quote:

I know I have a track record of relapse but it just seems that every time I have a bad day or I struggle a bit, everyone thinks that I am going to relapse.
I am almost scared these days to come and post anything about a bad day I'm having because I don't want to get anyone worried.

Please,, don't feel this way. People do not think you are just going to relapse everytime you have a bad day. Please be assured that you CAN post your problems, just like everyone else. We WILL listen, and we will be here to help you through. That IS why we are here!!

Ya know, there was a very long time that I was here, years, as a matter of fact, that I just kept on relapsing, and ya know what? I just kept on posting, and looking for people to show me their strength, and their hope, and their experience, so I could find a way to recovery too.. I finally found a way. But it took me a long time. I still post about all of my problems. I have many. So do others that are here that are in recovery. Recovery is not a big pink cloud. It is tough work.. It's harder than it is to use, but we know that in time, it will get better, and we will be better people for it. Right?

You just hang in there girl.. You just keep posting, and keep praying. Gos is watching out for you. Also, you just keep that attitude that, using isn't even an option for you anymore. That's the best news I have heard all day!!

Prayers,
Becky

**Done-With-It** · 03-28-2006, 01:17 PM

(((((HOPE))))

Woman! 28 days is fantabulous! It doesn't seem like a little bit at all to me!!!!

Your almost a month clean!! YOU ROCK!!

If it makes you feel any better, everytime you Have relapsed It has shocked me
somewhat. Not like 'utter shock' but a big surprise. I don't expect you to
relapse, and I know you are working hard. If you do and when you have, it's okay,
but I just mean, It's not like I just 'expect' you too relapse.

I come here all the time and stress, get upset, whatever I need to do. I hope that people don't think I'm about to relapse, but if they do that's their problem. We come here for E,S & H, or whatever those three initials are, (I always forget)
but we don't come here to be judged, so try not worry about that aspect of it.
If anything you may be feeling people being scared for you, but they are only scared because they care.

I think you are doing great! You hang in there, Keep the Faith girl, and Rock On!

Oh, and you 'Are Never Alone'....

Hope · 03-28-2006, 01:48 PM

Thanks Done!!!

Your post put a big smile on my face! Those words really touched my heart and that butterfly was beautiful.

You are so sweet!

roadie58 · 03-28-2006, 08:03 PM

that first month is a biiiatch, glad to hear the feeling subsiding a bit. Sorry I wasn't around for past couple of weeks. It makes me sad when friends are having hard time. I'm also one who needs to cut back on the caffiene, I've been on the road a lot and living on Mountain Dew and Rock Star. Getting heart palpitations off of too much caffiene, but I know stopping cold turkey will bring on migraines so trying to just taper.

You know the right stuff to do by now. When you're feeling low, reach out, maybe help someone else to get out of yourself. It's all good. Keep on girl, you're doing fine.

Charlina · 03-28-2006, 08:12 PM

You are doing great. You know when I get an urge or craving to use I change my atmosphere. Try to change what I am watching or listening to. They say a craving will only last for 15 min. (thats what they told me in rehab) but that 15 minutes could last forever in my opinion. So I do try and change what I am doing sometimes I find myself 45 min later thinking WOW that worked pretty well.... Good luck

Hope · 03-29-2006, 04:34 PM

Tomorrow will be 30 days for me. I also have a job interview tomorrow which is so awesome.

My advisor made me feel really bad today when she was discouraging from continuing in my major. She was trying to push me into finding another major but I think she went about it in the wrong way. I mean, I thought an advisor was supposed to find other ways to help me. She wasn't too friendly. I don't want to change my major but she sort of had me questioning whether I have the ability to do what I was hoping to accomplish.

I won't let her opinions keep me down. I know that I can do it. I only want to prove to myself that I can do it.

If I spend my whole life listening to others saying what I can't do, then I will never be able to do what I can do.

**Done-With-It** · 03-29-2006, 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hope4life

Tomorrow will be 30 days for me. I also have a job interview tomorrow which is so awesome.

My advisor made me feel really bad today when she was discouraging from continuing in my major. She was trying to push me into finding another major but I think she went about it in the wrong way. I mean, I thought an advisor was supposed to find other ways to help me. She wasn't too friendly. I don't want to change my major but she sort of had me questioning whether I have the ability to do what I was hoping to accomplish.

I won't let her opinions keep me down. I know that I can do it. I only want to prove to myself that I can do it.

If I spend my whole life listening to others saying what I can't do, then I will never be able to do what I can do.

Hope,

No can make you feel.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

Don't give your power away to this woman. Where would 'Oprah' and many
others be if they had listened to the 'Dream Stealers'....

Don't let anyone steal your dreams from you.
Your stronger than that.

Who cares what she thinks. Get a new advisor, one who believes in you.
Stand up for yourself girl, No one has the right to put you down.

Congrats on 30 days! That's awesome!

Hope · 03-29-2006, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Done-With-It

Who cares what she thinks. Get a new advisor, one who believes in you.
Stand up for yourself girl, No one has the right to put you down.

That was very empowering. I really needed to see those words. I have taken them to heart. I will definitely be changing advisors. I think some of what she was was unnessesarily negative (pretty much all of it). So, I'm going to find someone who will encourage and inspire me along the way.

The really awesome part of all of this is just the fact that I walked out of there somewhat discouraged, but I didn't have any desire at all to use. It didn't even cross my mind!! Wow, I actually handled a situation that once would have pushed me over the edge. In the past, that would be something that I would have used as an excuse to use. BUT NOT TODAY!!! That is progress for me!!!!!

**Alera** · 03-29-2006, 10:08 PM

That is great news, I am very impressed with how you handled that situation. Congrats on the 30 days.

Hope · 03-30-2006, 06:08 PM

Today has been a good day; 30 days sober and job interview (I think it went well).
The only downside is that I am going to have to move out of my apartment and I won't have anywhere to stay until May. That was a bummer for me but I find that things are better when we accept what happens. I spent so much time fighting life as it was happening refusing to accept things, and that cost me so much peace and serenity. I can look at the big picture now and accept life as it comes. In that, I can find comfort and peace.

03-26-2006, 06:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Today has been a struggle For some reason, crazy thoughts have come on strong. I haven't acted on them, I just wish they would go away.

03-26-2006, 06:50 PM	#2 (permalink)
rose petals alcohol-kicked-my butt Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: oregon Posts: 198	hi hope-- im laura,alkie,--whats going on?i just got done watching joel olsteen--have you ever seen him?--the message was just about being in peace and knowing gods in control--stop struggling--go with the flow type stuff and it frees you--course hes much better at getting the point over --hes a minister and it was a great message--if there is anything i can do --let me know--im here laura __________________ Desperate times call for desperate measures

03-26-2006, 07:45 PM	#4 (permalink)
aasharon90 Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Baton Rouge, La. Posts: 2,726	Hi I'm Sharon and Im an Alcoholic. I remember early on when i first got sober if thoughts poped into my head I would say the Serenity Prayer over and over again till I could feel it deep down within. Until I became calm. I also noticed that when i began sharing my ESH with someone else or went out to help someone then that would take the focus off of myself or get out of myself and think of another and their problems. Today since i was by myself, I posted more times here than any other time. Even tho i didn't have any thoughts of drinking today, I spent most of my time sharing, thus didn't have much time for anything else. Glad ur here for me. Thanks for letting me share. Love and care. __________________ "A FRIEND IN NEED IS A FRIEND INDEED" SHARON M. Baton Rouge, La. 8-11-90 "Made A Decision To Turn My Will And Life Over To The Care Of God As I Understand Him."

03-27-2006, 12:39 AM	#5 (permalink)
Done-With-It InAButtonKindOfWay. Seriously? Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Hollywood Posts: 8,250 Blog Entries: 15	Hey Hope, What's goin on? How you doin now? __________________ Living in fast forward Hollywood RockStar outta control Need to rewind real slow Alwys Runin Time to take control Oh yeah ...

03-27-2006, 07:49 PM	#7 (permalink)
angelgirl You're never alone!! Join Date: May 2003 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 2,194	Hey Hope,, Glad you are feeling a little better today. But I wanted to let you know that it is so important to taper yourself down off caffiene. Going off to quickly can be very hard on us. I also wanted to let you know, incase you don't already know there is an excellent thread going in the Mental Health forum on caffiene withdrawal. It really has some great info. and links. It would be great if you have time to check it out. The links are full of info. Prayers, Becky __________________ â„¢ Don't tell God how BIG your addiction is, tell your addiction, how BIG our GOD is!! Jesus is our teacher and he is our Savior, who takes our prayers and makes them his own.

03-27-2006, 01:35 PM	#6 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Day 27. Doing better today... those crazy thoughts have subsided. I feel tired and sluggish today. My head still feels like it is in a deep, thick fog. Still struggling with getting enough sleep. I could not go to sleep until 5 AM this morning. I just couldn't drift off to sleep last night. I got up at 10 AM. Today, I decided to cut back on caffeine since I believe that is causing major anxiety and may be contributing to my insomnia. I usually drink sodas ALL day long. But, this morning, I only had 2 cups of coffee and I had a few caffeine-free drinks throughout the day. For me, being without caffeine is HARD!! I want a Diet Dr. Pepper, SERIOUSLY! I have a horrible headache caused by caffeine withdrawals...and I am missing that usual jolt that is provided by sodas.. I don't know if I can keep away from the sodas, but I thought that it may be worth a shot. I got some L-Dopa extract vitamins today... I am gonna see if that helps some. I will definitely provide updates. Oh HEY, I love the Easter smilies! They are AWESOME!

03-27-2006, 08:43 PM	#8 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Thanks Becky! I think I cut back too much today because I started to feel sick by the afternoon and I became extremely sluggish even more than usual. Of course, the headaches were bad. I did fairly well with cutting back today. It definitely wasn't easy by any means. I drink sodas a lot of times just out of habit. LOL... but I decided to do everything that I can to better my health. I will check that link out, Becky! Cheryl

03-27-2006, 08:48 PM	#9 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	I know this sounds weird but I found some old ATM withdrawal slips from January when I was using and they just really messed with my head! I mean, I know it sounds crazy because they are just receipts but my mind was about to start thinking about that but ya know, I played that tape out and I remembered the pain. I said, NOPE, not today! Clean, sober, and very grateful!! I think as I get more clean time some of these triggers will diminish. At least somewhat, maybe. Just happy to be doing the sober dancing thing today! :bunny

03-28-2006, 12:28 AM	#11 (permalink)
Spungold49 Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: California Posts: 40	Phinneas ".....you've gotten some excellent advice so far. But what about that recovery prorgam you committed to work not so long ago? ...... are you going to meetings and how many a week? Do you have a sponsor? Do you call #s you get from women's meetings? Are you reading the BB and/or Basic Text? Are you working the steps? Are you avoiding people, places and things that trigger you?" Hey. As strange as it may seem coming from a soul with a name that has "SPUN" in it, I agree with Phinneas. The reason is because we AD/AL 's are expert at the art of manipulation. We try to control our environment, maintain the status quo,{If everyone would just stay put while I figure this out}.... Because if we are stopped in our tracks we have to face the truth about our addictions. {Everyone don't move on...wait..be here ..I know I can figure this out...I need more time....meetings will confuse me at this point...I have read the BB....This is on the subconcious level. But Carol, did you not get a jolt when you read P's reply? I did. Great advice, hard to swallow, but once done, stirs up something in that old donut hole. Thoughts are thoughts. They seem more real than "real" events. I know. it will get better. To borrow from Peter: ....and go away they will. This too shall pass....... Take care sweetie from a 7X around yoyo.

03-28-2006, 10:58 AM	#12 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	I've been working with my sponsor, going to 4/5 meetings a week, using phone numbers, and I am away from people, places, and things. I have been working on my recovery and I'm not whistling in the dark. I know I have a track record of relapse but it just seems that every time I have a bad day or I struggle a bit, everyone thinks that I am going to relapse. I am almost scared these days to come and post anything about a bad day I'm having because I don't want to get anyone worried. For me, using isn't even an option. The thoughts still come and go at times, but I haven't acted on them. I have 28 days clean and sober today I plan to continue adding my days up. I know that 28 days doesn't sound like a whole lot, but I have a lot of quality work in my days. I have really been working on me this time. I barely even see my family these days so I could put my recovery first. Outside of my AA and church family and SR, I am alone. The choice that I have made for today is to stay clean and sober and that is the choice I will make when I wake up tomorrow. I remember to say 'please' in the morning and 'thank you' at night. I know that things didn't get this bad overnight so it will probably take a while to get better. Easy does it. My past is full of stormy days but I am commited to my sobriety. I have a hard enough time dealing with life while sober, I have no need of going back out to further complicated matters even more. I have an NA Basic Text, AA Big Book, 12 Steps and 12 Traditions, plus lots of other recovery related material. I am always reading recovery stuff. Recovery is my life. I am recovering for my life. There are bad days as well as the good, but my sobriety comes first. I am really grateful that I have my friends at SR! Thanks for caring about me.

03-28-2006, 01:17 PM	#14 (permalink)
Done-With-It InAButtonKindOfWay. Seriously? Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Hollywood Posts: 8,250 Blog Entries: 15	(((((HOPE)))) Woman! 28 days is fantabulous! It doesn't seem like a little bit at all to me!!!! Your almost a month clean!! YOU ROCK!! If it makes you feel any better, everytime you Have relapsed It has shocked me somewhat. Not like 'utter shock' but a big surprise. I don't expect you to relapse, and I know you are working hard. If you do and when you have, it's okay, but I just mean, It's not like I just 'expect' you too relapse. I come here all the time and stress, get upset, whatever I need to do. I hope that people don't think I'm about to relapse, but if they do that's their problem. We come here for E,S & H, or whatever those three initials are, (I always forget) but we don't come here to be judged, so try not worry about that aspect of it. If anything you may be feeling people being scared for you, but they are only scared because they care. I think you are doing great! You hang in there, Keep the Faith girl, and Rock On! Oh, and you 'Are Never Alone'.... __________________ Living in fast forward Hollywood RockStar outta control Need to rewind real slow Alwys Runin Time to take control Oh yeah ...

03-28-2006, 01:48 PM	#15 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Thanks Done!!! Your post put a big smile on my face! Those words really touched my heart and that butterfly was beautiful. You are so sweet!

03-28-2006, 08:03 PM	#16 (permalink)
roadie58 "The BAND" workshop ROCKS! Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana Posts: 1,489	that first month is a biiiatch, glad to hear the feeling subsiding a bit. Sorry I wasn't around for past couple of weeks. It makes me sad when friends are having hard time. I'm also one who needs to cut back on the caffiene, I've been on the road a lot and living on Mountain Dew and Rock Star. Getting heart palpitations off of too much caffiene, but I know stopping cold turkey will bring on migraines so trying to just taper. You know the right stuff to do by now. When you're feeling low, reach out, maybe help someone else to get out of yourself. It's all good. Keep on girl, you're doing fine. __________________ Roadie read about my adventures in trying to stay clean in sober in 'I'm ALIVE' in the Substance Abuse Forum..

03-28-2006, 08:12 PM	#17 (permalink)
Charlina Charlene Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Tempe, AZ Posts: 40	You are doing great. You know when I get an urge or craving to use I change my atmosphere. Try to change what I am watching or listening to. They say a craving will only last for 15 min. (thats what they told me in rehab) but that 15 minutes could last forever in my opinion. So I do try and change what I am doing sometimes I find myself 45 min later thinking WOW that worked pretty well.... Good luck __________________ I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just be alive is a g rand thing. Agatha Christie

03-29-2006, 04:34 PM	#18 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Tomorrow will be 30 days for me. I also have a job interview tomorrow which is so awesome. My advisor made me feel really bad today when she was discouraging from continuing in my major. She was trying to push me into finding another major but I think she went about it in the wrong way. I mean, I thought an advisor was supposed to find other ways to help me. She wasn't too friendly. I don't want to change my major but she sort of had me questioning whether I have the ability to do what I was hoping to accomplish. I won't let her opinions keep me down. I know that I can do it. I only want to prove to myself that I can do it. If I spend my whole life listening to others saying what I can't do, then I will never be able to do what I can do.

03-29-2006, 10:08 PM	#21 (permalink)
Alera SR's SMART Goth Mod Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: SoCal Posts: 1,892	That is great news, I am very impressed with how you handled that situation. Congrats on the 30 days. __________________ Copyright © 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008 Alera The addiction will protect itself ... AT ALL COSTS.

03-30-2006, 06:08 PM	#22 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 3,211	Today has been a good day; 30 days sober and job interview (I think it went well). The only downside is that I am going to have to move out of my apartment and I won't have anywhere to stay until May. That was a bummer for me but I find that things are better when we accept what happens. I spent so much time fighting life as it was happening refusing to accept things, and that cost me so much peace and serenity. I can look at the big picture now and accept life as it comes. In that, I can find comfort and peace.