Question For Those Who Replied.. - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

southerngirl · 06-14-2005, 11:24 PM

First, Let Me Thank Each Of You For Your Replies To My Previous Post.. ( Now That He Is Recovered..) It Is Nice To Get Responses From Those Who Maybe Somewhat Like My Ah..
Yet, I Do Have A Question... In What You All Posted.. If He Is Where He Needs To Be Now, Then Where Do I Belong??? I Mean, We Have Been Married For 6 Years.. And He Says He Doing All He Can Do To Live A Christian Life... Then How Can He Want A Divorce? I Just Believe In My Heart That, God Wants That. Why Can I Still Be His Wife, While He Continues His Recovery.. Why Divorce??

fuster · 06-15-2005, 12:43 AM

People want a divorce when they feel there is no way to improve the relationship enough to make them comfortable with it, or they are not willing to do anything else to try to make things better. Your question would best be asked to husband, only he can tell you "why".

If this is more a rhetorical question about Christian beliefs being inconsistent with divorce, there are divorces among Christians, and sometimes things just cannot be worked out. Sometimes recovery produces growth in a different direction.

**best** · 06-15-2005, 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fuster

If this is more a rhetorical question about Christian beliefs being inconsistent with divorce, there are divorces among Christians, and sometimes things just cannot be worked out. Sometimes recovery produces growth in a different direction.

Yes there are divorces in the Christian world but that doesn't make it proper or acceptable. God says no to divorce.

You are correct in saying he needs to be asked why he wants one.

Southerngirl
I would think the best thing to do would be sit down with your pastor and the 3 of you talk things out.
If his heart is so hard that he continues with wanting a divorce, only God can change his heart. God may allow him to walk so you may be free to move on with your own life. Keep trying but remember you can't change him only he and God can bring the changes.
Prayers for you both.

roadie58 · 06-15-2005, 02:11 AM

I'd like to help but being 46 and never even close to being married, feel horribly uninformed in this area. Prayers go out to you though.

golf99 · 06-15-2005, 05:12 AM

Rell him you'll stand side by side with him. If my wife knew i relapsed, i'd be out. You can be a rock during his recovery, i'm going it alone (thank God for this board) i wish my wife stood with me. Maybe when people recover they say, "what the hell is all this" and want out, i don't know. Keep picking his brain, i feel you'll find more to it.

golf99 · 06-16-2005, 03:46 PM

How is your situation? Post...

eaglesgirl · 06-16-2005, 04:38 PM

I have to admit that I did not read your other thread yet.

Have you been to a Nar-Anon meeting yourself? Have you started your own recovery?

I have found that they have helped me find me in all of my husbands addictions.

06-14-2005, 11:24 PM	#1 (permalink)
southerngirl Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: opp,alabama Posts: 4	Question For Those Who Replied.. First, Let Me Thank Each Of You For Your Replies To My Previous Post.. ( Now That He Is Recovered..) It Is Nice To Get Responses From Those Who Maybe Somewhat Like My Ah.. Yet, I Do Have A Question... In What You All Posted.. If He Is Where He Needs To Be Now, Then Where Do I Belong??? I Mean, We Have Been Married For 6 Years.. And He Says He Doing All He Can Do To Live A Christian Life... Then How Can He Want A Divorce? I Just Believe In My Heart That, God Wants That. Why Can I Still Be His Wife, While He Continues His Recovery.. Why Divorce??

06-15-2005, 02:11 AM	#4 (permalink)
roadie58 "The BAND" workshop ROCKS! Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana Posts: 1,489	I'd like to help but being 46 and never even close to being married, feel horribly uninformed in this area. Prayers go out to you though. __________________ Roadie read about my adventures in trying to stay clean in sober in 'I'm ALIVE' in the Substance Abuse Forum..

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06-15-2005, 12:43 AM	#2 (permalink)
fuster Late stage optimist Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Auburn, WA Posts: 262	People want a divorce when they feel there is no way to improve the relationship enough to make them comfortable with it, or they are not willing to do anything else to try to make things better. Your question would best be asked to husband, only he can tell you "why". If this is more a rhetorical question about Christian beliefs being inconsistent with divorce, there are divorces among Christians, and sometimes things just cannot be worked out. Sometimes recovery produces growth in a different direction.

06-15-2005, 05:12 AM	#5 (permalink)
golf99 Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: MIDCOAST NH Posts: 329	Rell him you'll stand side by side with him. If my wife knew i relapsed, i'd be out. You can be a rock during his recovery, i'm going it alone (thank God for this board) i wish my wife stood with me. Maybe when people recover they say, "what the hell is all this" and want out, i don't know. Keep picking his brain, i feel you'll find more to it.

06-16-2005, 03:46 PM	#6 (permalink)
golf99 Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: MIDCOAST NH Posts: 329	How is your situation? Post...

06-16-2005, 04:38 PM	#7 (permalink)
eaglesgirl Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Jersey Posts: 154	I have to admit that I did not read your other thread yet. Have you been to a Nar-Anon meeting yourself? Have you started your own recovery? I have found that they have helped me find me in all of my husbands addictions.

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