CobraCommander

i injured my chest while working. i would regularly take about 5 15mg oxycodone pills a day everyday for roughly 10 years, i did mechanic work and truck loading work in the past i even posted on here last year trying to quit pills and realized i wasnt in withdrawals i was in actual pain.

last year for about 3 months straight i did some heavy lifting remodeling my house alone. i was doing a enormous amount of damage to my body sore as heck but kept at it everyday, i thinkt he pain pills covered my pain up so good i didnt know i shoulda rested more. well one day while reaching up i couldnt breath and fell to the floor. i called someone to take me to the emergency room i felt my chest tightening like a panic attack but this was woorse then that i was blacking out and getting dizzy (ive had anxiety since about 2nd grade and never experienced a panic attack this bad, i usually just get anxiety and not panic attacks). my upper chest felt like my heart was going to explode. i thought i was having a heart attack.

well that was in december. the dr said i was ok and released me, but i could not walk after that day. i couldnt breathe at all! all i could do was lay here thinking everyday i was going to die. after about the first month i realized my pain meds were making this worse so i started taking half a pill instead and it was helping. i also noticed my posture and using a computer was hurting my chest. (right now it hurts badly im typing as fast as possible) ive barely been able to use a computer or laptop the past fe wmonths more then a few minutes, at first even sitting in my bed trying to watch tv or play video games hurt so after 2 or 3 months i started sleeping on my couch and that helped.

so basically the past 5 months i spent almost every minute on my couch unable to breath. i cut my pain meds in half and went down to 2.5 15mg a day which is barely anything because i cant handle a full pill, if i take a full pill i get extreme attack and cant breath it feels like i took a 1000000mgs of hell, ive never had that happen to me. before when my pain was at its worse before this incident i could take up to 8 pain pills that was my max for pain i dont think i could safely do more then that i know my limit. now its only 2.5 a day, thats all my body can handle because when i take pain meds as they wear off i instantly get a panic attack.

see the first about 3 or 4 months my upper chest muscle was torn or somthing. i been to ever emergency room, specialist etc. and they all said i was ok. i know for a fact my upper chest was strained because i couldnt even lift or open a 2 litre.

now i got my upper chest to finally heal but now i have this new issue. ive had this pain under my left breast in the curve area where it feels like a spike is being driven into it. i got more tests done and they said im ok

what i think is happening is a few things, either that section is strained and everyday i reinjur it when i just sit here, or when i leave and try to do something. or cutting down on my pain meds is causing my anxiety attacks. i am now taking my anxiety medication and that seems to help ALOT. withina hour it takes it away. but im already taking now 3 1mg of xanax and its not enough. every 2 to 4 hours the pain comes back. if i could totally stop the pain meds i think this could possible go away but the problem is im not a addict, i have actual pain that is unbearable. i mean as it is the 2.5 pain pills im taking is almost doing nothing for my pain it helps me get out of bed, and then helps me go to the store or work for about a hour or 2. maybe 3 hours if im lucky then im sore the rest of the day. i have fibro very badly, a deteriated disc in my back, bad knee, (i can go on and on with the issues i think you get the picture)

i just dont know what to do, has anyone else ever gone through this? i was fine taking my 5 pills a day last year. i was on pain meds about 10 years straight and then all of a sudden that one day BOOM my life changed and i cant take them. it even took me a few months to even realize that the pain meds were even causing this panic/and/or pain thing.

ive talked to a few older people and they said they had the same issue. i dunno what to do, my health is getting worse and i need to do work, i need to go out and exercise, im thriving to do something everyday but im limited to what my body will let me do. i can wake up and automatically feel like a spear is in my chest and know i cant do a single thing but lay here and heal, and then theres other days its on and off, and maybe 1 day every 3 weeks i feel 100% fine besides aches.

i just dont understand why all of a sudden i cant take my pain meds. ive been recording logs and blogs for 5 months trying to find the perfect formula for my meds. so far the only thing i can come up with is take a anxiety pill with my pain pill, or a hour after. i feel 100% fine when i take a pain pill it take 40 minutes to kick in and then 20 minutes after that i get a attack. so im guessing its some sort of withdrawal.

im just really lost and odnt know what to do, when im in pain i try a advil or a pain pill or a anxiety pill and 1 of the 3 will usually cure it.
for the past about 6 months ive only taken 2.5 pills a day. a few days i took 3 pain pills but thats only because i was up like 20 hours straight because i had no pain and was so excited i could walk i didnt want to sleep.

right now if i knew i had no actual real pain i would go into some kinda rehab and ask for help, but the fact is im obviously not a abuser if im only taking 2.5 pills a day lol thats barely anything thats like taking a tylenol lol.

has anyone had this experience with having a pulled chest muscle and then not being able to use pain pills because it cuases anxiety attacks? i dunno if its because of a key area i hurt, or if my body is trying to fight pain and making me breath hard causing the attack, or if my heart rate speeding up from the pain pill is making my mind think its a panic attack. i just want these panic attacks to stop already so i can stop taking xanax it makes me so tired!!! i literally didnt walk or get off my couch for the entire winter i was in so much pain i felt like everyday was a heart attack every hour. this has been the most miserable experience EVER!!!!

i also bought a crapload of vitamins to try to help, they give me a little bit of energy and alertness but they arent helping the anxiety at all. if its even anxiety i dunno. all i know is i been to every single specialist i can think of and they all been complete jerks to me basically saying your fine and shoving me out the door without hearing my whole story. i would prepare a whole presentation on my pain to help them help me figure this out, and they would just ignore it and give me a cream or something dumb. ive only had one dr actually listen to me and try to help me through this thing.

as stupid as this sound i would like to get back to being on 5 pain pills a day again comfortably with no issues to take my pain away and have a normal living life again. right now im in regular pain all day on top of this breathing issue pain. sure it sounds great that im down to almost only 2 pain pills a day but i just cannot live a normal life and go to events and walk around stores or do yard work without them.

anyone who has had a similar experience, or suggestions anything would be greatlya ppreciated. i posted once on here last year and people were awesome. i tried a different forum a few months ago and it was nothing but drug addicts looking for ways to get high which disgusted me. i noticed this forum has people who actually help people

im sorry that was so long but i needed to say all that, thanks

cleaninLI

Welcome back cobra. It's good to see you. I really hate to have to say what I'm going to say. I want to put it as gently as possible. But your whole post just screamed addiction to me. I'm not doubting that you have legit pain too. Which is what really sucks about this whole thing. But all those breathing issues you've been having and that extra anxiety is all related to long term opiate use. I know, because I had it too. I've been off Percs and Oxy for over two years and my anxiety isn't near what it was when I was taking them. I was on Xanax too back then. But it was only I quick fix. It didn't resolve my anxiety the way the all natural method I'm using has.

Trust me until you can get out from under this addiction...your quality of life is going to become progressively worse. Even I know right now you are not convinced you are addicted. The pain and anxiety you feel will become worse too. These meds just mask the pain while you are taking it...but they don't cure it. There are so many better ways.

They just take bits and pieces of your life until there is nothing left but a life of counting and scheduling doses..... of waiting in doctors offices and pharmacies....Of trying to keep out of withdrawal.

No offense to you but I felt sad reading your post. It took me back to when pills ruled my life. When a good day meant lots of pills on hand and a bad day meant I was running out and needed to get more. It was such a sad way to live.

I hope you will find it in yourself to look seriously into what your life has become.
It doesn't have to be like this.

CobraCommander

i thank you for the response and dont worry i didnt get offended at all, i need the truth from what people think and thats eactly what you gave me so i cant get mad at that.

i get 180 pain pills a month, and i only take around 70 of them. i have been to that point before that you are talking about, needing my refill the exact same day that i got it refilled the previous month but ive long surpassed that and the withdrawals of the leg cramps and etc. it seems like the anxiety may be the only withdrawal related thing atm because the pain just seems related to when im working or sleeping a bad way. right now im only taking them as needed when im in actual pain but im not sure what alternative i can do. i have fibro and chostochonritis (i have small rib spacing, and funnel chest, throbbing ribs) which is making my rib areas ache. if i could sit on the couch all day that would eliminate my body aches and i think i might possible get away with just advil for the pain. but ive already gained 10 pounds over the winter which means im out of shape making me breathe harder when i walk causing even more anxiety.

i think before this major breathing issue started may have been more of a addiction stage, life just fealt so much better when i was pain free before. but ive been constantly trying to eliminate these pills as much as possible right now.

how long did your anxiety last when you stopped taking pain pills?
i would feel a little more humble if i knew for sure this anxiety was from cutting back on the pain meds and that at least one day itll go away.

basically the only plan i have right now is to keep trying to get healthy, keep trying to get my breathing issue better, eliminate anxiety pills.

im really trying hard to try to exercise each day and hoping that will minimize the pain in the long run by getting my body in shape(although right now it just makes things worse lol). i do agree that the length i was on them may have made my body addicted to it and i think my body is basically screaming pissed at me for cutting back on them.

i just have no idea on how to stop both the anxiety and pain. it seems like i get the pain from trying to work, and then seems like i get the anxiety from the pain pills. its like a never ending loop. as far as the xanax thats strictly a temp fix to help me breath at the moment. as soon i can get off them i will, i have no desire at all for them and i hate them and the only pleasure i get from them is actual breathing. the pain meds are a nice "buzz" but i could also do without that as well, the main priority has always been pain. its just these darn aches everytime i try to be productive. ive had this house nearly a year and ive just finally started regoing back and slowly working on it and cutting the grass.

theres really rarely ever a time i take the pain meds just to take them, its mainly because ill do something like paint a wall and feel like im going to cry after from the aches.

if you can offer a alternative of what i can do or take to stop both the pain and anxiety meds that would clear me of my anxiety and pain im willing to try anything.

im hoping once i make my actual move into my new place that i will be alot more stress free because i will be more alone, i will have a proper new bed, a proper computer desk and that will hopefully eliminate the anxiety and pain. i have alot on my plate, im taking care of 2 old parents who divorced, a sick dog, and then on top of myself.

sometimes i sit here and wish i was one of the addicts who got on drugs strictly for the high and fun of it, then i would know i could stop it alot more easy.

i kinda rambled alot on that post i just have been through so much trying to figure this out for so long.

Tiredofdrugs

Hi Cobra!

Man! Where to start! Hmmmmmmm Sorry you are in the pain from your injuries! Sorry about your breathing problems! I'm a 100% DAV! Believe me! I understand pain and misery! However! I chose to abstain from ALL pain meds in order to feel better! The pain meds were making it harder and harder for me to breathe! (There's a paragraph at the top of walmart's prescription papers that states the opiates cause breathing problems)! The pain meds were keeping me planted in a chair and unwilling to do much of anything! They in the end were also causing my pain to be worse!

See those little pills we pop to feel better is actually just tricking our minds into believing we feel better! The medication in them doesn't go to the source of pain to help THERE! Once I detoxed off the opiates I started trying different OTC meds as well as stuff I ordered to try and help with my pain! They actually worked to help get rid of my pain! The opiates were only masking my feelings within my brain. It wasn't doing anything for the actual source of pain.

I have to disagree with you too on what you said: "I wish I was only taking them for recreational purposes! It would be easier to get off them!" So NOT true! I've read many a story with ppl exactly in those positions and they didn't find it easy to give up or get off them!

As for your anxiety? You are bouncing all over the place with your feelings because of your use of the opiates! You were giving your body a large dose. Then you lowered the dose! Your mind and body are stressing out to the max over not knowing how to feel! Then you throw in the pain on top of it and you have a huge salad mixture of issues! Then you go to work on your house and do too much! Now you've stressed painful areas even more! GO SLOW!

Look at the big picture and take it apart piece by piece! Like a puzzle piece! Take that small piece of puzzle that pertains to an area of the house! Now ONLY work on that small area! I have to do this! There's tons of stuff to be done here at home. It sometimes overwhelms me! I have to pull my mind back into focus and only concentrate on one small area! If I work on one small thing at a time? Then slowly all the puzzle pieces come together to create a beautiful picture! If I only clean out a drawer? That's a piece of the puzzle! If I only work on getting the couch cover washed and the couch vacuumed? If I only sweep and mop the kitchen floor? That's a piece of the puzzle! It keeps things simple and it's also getting things done!

We are human! When we've been injured we can't go as fast and be as productive as we used to be! I've learned to do things in different positions in order to not hurt my back/knees, etc. also!

Hope this helps you to understand from a different perspective? A woman's view of things!

Tiredofdrugs
(TOD)

cleaninLI

I'm sorry cobra I've been wanting to get back to your thread...but kids are home from school and I haven't gotten there. But I agree with TOD about the breathing issues and the way she chops up her tasks into smaller potions. I have to do that too or I'd be totally overwhelmed!
I don't have breathing issues but I see that some people do....which is why I'm pretty sure the opies are causing it.

My anxiety got better after about two weeks off the pills. However, it was even better after a month. I had to retrain my brain though. I learned about mindfulness from the anxiety section of this forum. It took some time, but the benefits are so worth it. So please look Up mindfulness and get started on this technique.

What TOD says about the pills changing the way your brain thinks about your pain and how there are other things that go to the actual sites of the pain to cure it is so true! These pills only mask the pain....they never cure it. So the injury that is causing the pain goes without treatment. You then work harder because you don't feel the pain..then injure yourself more. But trust me there are treatments that work at the injury site and heal it. My daughter suffers from fiber myalgia too....as well as car accident injuries. But thru massage and physical therapy has reduced the pain she feels. There are other remedies like cactus juice , (TOD uses)vitamins, herbal remedies etc...that do work.

But I guarantee these pills that you are taking....no matter how small or large the dose....will never ever be the answer. They were never meant to be a long term solution to pain. They work fine....for pain just after surgery, or intense pain from an injury that just happened, or tooth ache pain. But that is it!!! They are not a long term solution!

So it's your choice to continue as is......Loose all your mobility and life....or go out on a limb and try something else? It's your choice. No one can make you decide...only YOU can.

But we are here to support you! I appreciate that you are taking my responses for what they are. My strong negative opinion of the pills based on how much better my life is off of them. I feel like I was given a new lease on life. I want that joy for you too. It really hurts me to see you suffering so badly when it doesn't have to be that way!

CobraCommander

thanks for writing all that. i can relate alot to it. the past 6 months have been like a puzzle you said. im trying everyday to at least do a little. even if its just walking up to my house and turning the lights on and off for the day. some days i can do a little more then others.

i dont know what part about this is worse the pain or the breathing

i cant even go into a store without taking a 1mg xanax, or even do anything actually.

im trapped in such a bad loop right now. i take a small pain pill when i wake up and boom 40 minutes later i get relief and boom 20 minutes after i get hit by the worst heart crushing anxiety ever. unfortunately the longer i go without pain meds the bigger the pain is and less i can do. im trying so many alternatives right now

im slowly trying to ride my bike at least once a week if im not in to much pain in order to make my breathing better through cardio. but unfortunately i usually have to take a pain pill to do that, followed by a xanax.

ive always had bad anxiey since about 1st grade, and i think the pain meds masked it for years and got rid of it. its the only thing that worked. and now the pain meds are causing it and even if i dont take the pain meds i get it lol.

it seems like the only thing i can do right now is take a small chunk of a pain pill and then in a half hour take a small chunk of xanax and they balance each other out. thats so far the only way i can get through the day.

it seems like everyday the anxiety gets worse when i take a pain med.

i wish i knew a alternative. my vitamins are giving me a bit more energy, but they arent doing squat for the anxiety and pain. and if i take ibprofin or advil etc they get me sick usually.

i keep trying all these new techniques to try to fix this. and ive fixed most of it except the worst part, breathing. without me being able to breathe right i might as well be a cement sidewalk. i cant fix my health at all if i cant breath

im going to try to cut the pain meds out completely, or ask my dr for a alternative that is something less strong. yesterday i took a full pain pill. i havent done that in 6 months. for a hour i fealt completely pain free for the first time in i dunno how long i was so happy, and then 20 minutes later followed up by the worst heart pounding anxiety tight chest thumping ever for the next 4 or 5 hours. i couldnt even lay down because of the pressure on my body laying down made it harder to breathe

yikes does this suck!! how do you pick between pain and breathing

Tiredofdrugs

Before I say anymore? What has your doctor told you about all of these problems?

Have you had a recent chest Xray?

Do you use inhalers?

TOD

CobraCommander

i totally agree with you on masking the pain part, i have a friend who has alot of injuries and then they take their pain meds and overwork themselves and they injure themself more, therefore making themself have to take more pills

im gonna try to stretch the pills out a extra hour farther a day for a week, and then 2 extra hours and etc. until i can get off them or at least cut the dose down more. oxycodone is imo really powerfull. i dunno if there is a alternative i can get on that is less powerfull to do this or what. god this pain is such a burden!!!

my sleeping has gone down the drain as well. everytime i sleep i get extremely overheated i wake up in a ball of fire lol. and as soon as i take the covers off and get up i realize the house is actually freezing from the central air and i cool off immediately. is this a known issue as well, it seems like my body is throwing off alot of heat in my sleep? and then thats causing my heart to race and causing me panic attacks

my progress today was i took a drive, i drove around the city for about 2 hours. i even stopped and gave 2 little kids some money that were playing. and then i went to home depot, i went inside and couldnt breath after wlaking down a aisle. i went back to my car, took a half a xanax, waited 10 minutes and went back in and i was completely normal. im really afraid of being hooked on xanax. ive been prescribed it for nealy 10 years and ive rarely ever taken it, only for serious attacks. and now that i take less pain meds, i need to take more xanax. so all i can do is hope that i can keep taking less pain meds, and then less xanax and hope im not switching one drug for another.

i will look up mindfullness. btw does anyone know if being out of shape can contribute to this anxiety? i keep mentioning it to the drs and they laugh about it. i keep asking them if i should get liposuction to actually relieve some of this pressure that i think might be making it harder for me to breathe. im extremely skinny but i got a pot belly and im very uncomfortable when i sit to drive or i eat to much etc. and i keep thinking this is contributing to me running out of breathe when i walk in a store and then having a anxiety attack. as i said im trying to exercise when possible to make it easier to breathe and lose some stomach fat, but its again hard to do when you cant breathe in the first place.

im sorry again for the rambling on and on, i have so much to say and im all over the place. you know i tell my friends this stuff and not a single one of them understand at all. its like talking to a wall. and here i have 2 complete strangers who know exactly how i feel.

im not sure if i even asked questions or im just complaining/begging the gods for help at this point with my last 2 posts but it at least fealt good to get some of that off my chest. some of these days feels like im making really good progress and getting better and then out of no where i wake up and have a 3 day funeral for myself, todays been one of those days.

Tiredofdrugs

Have you looked at these Threads?

Anxiety Disorders - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

TOD

CobraCommander

hey tod, unfortunately no doctors have had any answers. this has been going on since december. ive been to the emergency room about 3 times, had multiple ct scans, ekg (or whatever there called with the wires) checked for blood clots multiple times, blood tests, echo test, stress test, went to a muscle dr. they all have no clue. most try to rush me out within 5 minutes because they overbook. i even prepared notes for them about specifics and blogs and prepared a list of questions from research asking them about the possibilities of it being this or that. nobody will help me, ive had to pretty much remedy everything myself. even once i went tot he emergency room that i had never been to and they accused me of being some guy who using a fake social security number to get drugs. i flipped out, i said listen to me i dont want any god damn pills! i want help! im here because my chest hurts i dont know where to go, what specialist i should see and overall i cant breathe will you people just help me! i was begging the doctor. they act like we should just know where to go like we all have medical degrees. ill tell you what by the end of this i should have a medical degree since ive helped myself more then they have. one of the worst parts is not being able to stay online very long because of the pain. i will check those links when i can

ive been thinking of what you guys said above and decided last night to try to quit cold turkey on these pain pills. they are the last thing i can think of that is causing my chest pains and anxiety. this all first started from upper chest pain i was putting blinds up in my house and i strained a muscle in my upper chest. the muscle dr told me i didnt, but i know i did because i couldnt even open a 2 litre of soda nor even pet my dog etc. by the 3rd month of resting my lower chest started hurting. i found my bed was hurting my upper chest, and then when i went to the couch it was hurting my lower chest alot. so each month ive been trying to pinpoint these pains, and each specialist i go to gives me the same answers which are just opinions and blank stares saying your tests look fine we dont know whats going on

so ive really been thinking about what you guys said and last night at 1am i decided to try to quit cold turkey. well i went to bed and made it to 8am then my legs woke me up in extreme pain. so i took half a pill. right now its been about 12 hours since, so im going to take my other half. ive barely had any chest pains today, only slight anxiety which a xanax took away. by the end of today ill have accomplished taking only 1 full pill today. tommorow i plan on doing the same thing until im down to 0. im almost positive now for some reason the injury i had in december and the trauma i went through the past 6 months barely able to move and walk somehow made my pain pills stop helping me and started destroying me with anxiety and chest pains.

so keep me in your prayers. i will try to check out the links, i know theyll help but i have to sign off for now, computer gives me pains being on to much. thank you

CobraCommander

i seem to really be in a pickle here since my last post.

ive been trying to completely quit these pills as they have been giving me chest pains, but the horrendous leg pains keep me at 1 1/2 to 2 pills a day. i cant seem to get lower then that.

if i take more then 2 pills i get a stabbing chest pain which is my reason for needing to stop. the stabbing chest pain is worse then my injuries and body aches that i have taken the pills for the past 10 years.

now i wake up with my legs in extreme pain while sleeping and take half a pill. and then while up i need to take usually 3 1/2 pills during the day to get through these pains.

the big problem im having right now is, the stabbing pain has gone away since im down to 2 pills, but now when i take a pill i cant breathe at all! im very much so hoping this is anxiety. im up to 3 xanaxs a day its the only thing i can take to breathe after i take a pain pill.

i totally dont understand this at all. the more and more ive decreased pain pills the more and more new problems are arising. i have no clue why my pain meds are making me not able to breathe. im guessing this is anxiety since the xanax takes it away within a hour or 2. im just so helpless right now, the longer i stay online the more my chest hurts so i cant even do much research when people try to help me on here.

im afraid i took pain meds for so long that i destroyed my heart or something. although ive had every emergency test possible and basically everything says im ok, so im praying its just a massive anxiety attack reacting to my body cutting down on pain meds and not being able to handle them when i do take them. i really hate to take them at all but my bones feel broken. i tried vicoden as a alternative 2 different days but they did 0 for the pain.

im really scared as these breathing attacks make me feel like im going to pass out. my face gets red. today i took 1/4th of a piece of a pill and felt bad. thats roughly only around 3mg. and in the pamphlet it does say anxiety and breathing issue is a bad side effect. i just dont understand why now after about 10 years its happening.

all i know is im going through complete hell. i think i was on these so long that trying to cold turkey this is really twisting my heart like a tornado.all i can say is thank god for xanax!!!

i have another question, i want to go to another dr for a second opinion but from the past 7 months the more details i tell a dr the worst they treat me. they automatically label me as unimportant/ drug abusing/lying/ no problem addict. the first things i tell them is that im on pain and anxiety meds to try to help them help me and i explain im not here to get more of that stuff that i just want help with my chest pains and they always immediately treat me horribly but i feel if i leave that stuff out they may not be able to diagnose me properly if its the pills that are a factor. so is it possible to go to another dr and use a alias and pay out of pocket just strictly for advice and another opinion? i basically want to just tell another dr whats going on without offending my regular dr. and tell them i dont want any drugs at all i just want a second opinion on my pains and why am i having these horrible chest pains when i take a pain med.

i wish i could find a alternative to help my pains to get through the day but i got a table of restless leg syndrome, advil, vitamins, etc and none of it helps. the only thing that helps is taking as less pain pills as possible and as many xanaxs as possible when i cant breath after the pain meds. i desperately want to get off these pain meds to totally be free of this madness but after 10 years hey its not as easy as i thought.

i feel like im going through massive withdrawals when i take a pill if that even makes sense? as well as going through massive withdrawals when i go to long without one

sorry if thats all over the place, i been meaning to write all this for a week and been hyperventalating to bad the past few days to even come on here to type. i just now got a lucky moment to feel ok enough to come online to type

it seems like at the moment all i can do is try to go as long as possible without a pill and pray that when i do need one that it doesnt send me into the complete body crushing unbreathable experience. some days i can get away with breathing decent or ok when i take a piece but alot of the times itll practically paralyze me onto the couch for hours until the xanax mellows my heart down. heck even if i lay down during a attack i can hear my heart thumping through my ear drum onto the pillow

Tiredofdrugs

Cobra!

You are taking two powerful drugs! Opiates and Xanax! The leg pain is probably due to the decrease of opiates? It's part of withdrawals! Because when you take 1/2 a pain pill? The leg pain goes away!

Then you take Xanax on top of the opiates! I don't know anything about Xanax, but I do opiates!

Most ppl coming off opiates have anxiety! And the leg pains or RLS! I get the RLS! Opiates cause breathing problems too!

You're feeding your body two different drugs! Of course your body is going to rebel against not getting them!

Instead of seeing another doctor? Why don't you talk to your doctor about weaning you off both of them? Your database of records says you are coming in with these issues! They all see you are taking these drugs. Of course they are thinking you're needing more! Most drug users do! If you ask to be weaned off of them? They'll probably approach you in a better manner!

There are drugs a doctor can prescribe you to help you thru the withdrawals! Until you give yourself the chance to get clean of these drugs? You're probably going to continue having issues!

TOD

CobraCommander

hi tod thanks again for the response. a few days ago i did go to my dr and talk about trying to work out a solution to this. i explained i was weening off the pills and i was getting massive anxiety. she seems to think its mainly just anxiety and gave me a extra pill a day. (edit, she gave me a extra anxiety pill a day since its hard for me to get out and get to the dr and then store its easier to have extra so i dont have to go the exact day of the refills i can have leeway and also so i dont run out of the anxiety meds, she also kept the pain med amount around the same just for the same sake, i explained i didnt need the amount im getting but it only helps making it a bit comfrtable to not rush to the store for them) i recomennded asking if there was a alternative, or trying a lower mg, i told her everything honestly that ive been taking halfs and cutting down etc. she calmed me down and said its prob anxiety since ive had a history of anxiety. so i left feeling a bit more optimistic. i actually even had one of the ER doctors tell me i wasnt taking enough xanax. i first only was takin .25 of a 1mg pill and they said thats relaly not going to do anything so thats when i started taking half pieces of xanax.


im going to a heart dr today, as usual i always write a mini blog out to tell them about the med tapering ive been slowly doing over the months, the injuries, the tests etc.

whats scary is the new symptom im having. now that ive mainly got rid of the sharp pain in my chest, im now having a feeling of lightheadedness if my body has any sort of over excitement to the point i almost black out and my eyes hurt my pupils got huge the other day. a few examples is

1. my neighbor was playing his car radio loud for 3 hours i yelled at him over the fence to stop or move because this has been happening for year and after i got all riled up yelling my head got extremely red i got dizzy and almost faint. i had to come inside and lay down. almost everyday since then this has happened

i tried being optimistic and cut the grass and went out for a drive i was doing good until i saw someone doing a arson. i ran to the burning house and seen it on fire, i called fire dept immediately. within a half hour a group of people were asking me questions. i felt fine then it started again, i felt my ears getting red hot, my head and bodily getting heavily hot, and i came rushing back to the house to lay down to cool and elevate my body so i didnt pass out.

it happened once againn during a minor argument with my mom. (actually the way we talk we debate things in a argument lol weve always been that way we talk loud to each other) this pumped it up again. within minutes i was starting to turn red and i said ok lets stop this im not feeling good and had to lay down.

so i finally said lets make the heart dr appointment and see what they say. maybe this is all just tapering withdrawals and high anxiety and itll slowly go away im trying to still be optimistic.

i have to sleep with a sheet and no shirt because if my body temp builds up while sleeping i get overheated and it wakes me up with my heart pounding out of my chest and then as soon as i get up and take the covers off i realize the room temp is freezing. so almost each day i been waking up with my heart racing.

ive had leg issues since around 2nd or 3rd grade so im really hoping like you said its withdrawals causing the leg pain. one of the biggest fears is the actual pain ive been masking with pills all these years and having to face it every single day now.but again, with your help im being optimistic that the more i taper the longer and farther apart these pains will space out and the less meds i can take.

im just really scared about this red headed, light headed, eyes hurting head heating thing thats been going on. ive been trying to go out and exercise and move around by just walking in stores and etc. but now i feel stonewalled that what if this happens when im out in public and i cant get anywhere to lay down and collapse, what if im driving and crash. which again might kinda box me inside my house afraid i might hurt others. i did read in a few other spots people said they had dizzyness coming off of morphine.

if the tapering withdrawals are this bad i dont even wanna know what cold turkey feels like lol. i dont think i could safely cold turkey this. im getting closer and its been a long process and ive stuck to minimizing and not increasing so far. but man im scared, i just hope the heart dr doesnt say today its some sort of blockage or some crap they missed

if anything else i hope these little mini blogs im writing hopes someone in the future with a similar process who is gonna share the same journey as me, and hopefully i have a good outcome and they see this and it calms them down and makes their journey easier. ive been reading forums with similar symptoms as far back as 2010 wondering what happened to the people if they made it or not they always just disappear, i hope they fealt better and stopped writing, but worry maybe they found something bad and never had a chance to come back.

CobraCommander

also ive told each dr right off the bat i didnt want more meds just wanted chest pain help and i wasnt there to try to get anything out of them. and since the start ive been decreasing. so im pretty honest to them about all that. theres hasnt been a time in the past 7 months that ive increased the pain meds only decreased more and more so they shouldnt think negativity. they actually all talked me into taking the xanax more to help my breathing (which has been the only thing that did help). it sucks that my honesty is hurting me instead of helping me. another problem is each dr says they dont deal with chest pains and then send me off to another dr which takes forever to get to and then they do the same thing basically see someone else.

CobraCommander

guess i just wanted to give a update since the past week. i went to the heart dr. i was having a horrible anxiety breathing attack before going so by the time i got to the hospital i was ready to black out. i figured this was good so they could see my symptoms. i used a blood pressure machine befor ei left to monitor myself, i noticed my pulse shot up to 100 pretty quick during my attack and my bp was pretty close to perfect only spiked maybe +10

so i get there and tell them my pulse is high and they gave me a room right away and i laid down and took my shirt off to cool down. i was having a horrendous withdrawal anxiety attack. i have been having these about 2 weeks now since i cut below 3 pills a day.

i told him i was tapering and trying to get healthy etc. of course he instantly gave me the old junky routine telling me to change my life and i tried to explain all the injuries i had etc. and that this was more of a dependence issue not a addiction. i dont think he believed i was tapering, he basically made me feel like a loser which i was already prepared for because all drs do

anyways good thing is that my heart should be ok, he is going to order another echo heart test to look closer to double make sure nothing is clogged etc.

i cant seem to safely taper below 1.5 pills (roughly 22mg) a day.

ive lost my vision, got dizzy, all sorts of horrific effects. the worst part is just not being able to breathe and walk all day i am pretty disabled

my mom saw a deer outside (we live in the city so thats rare) i walked to the door and was already out of breathe. the walk + small excitement was enough to put me back to the couch ready to blackout.

i feel so bad i cant do anything to help my mom, cant cut the grass or anything. shes taking care of me like a maid. i cant breathe the entire day because my anxiety is so high that it is disabling me. i just lay here like a lifeless corpse waiting for nighttime hoping i get tired enough to sleep so it can advance another day

ive completed blocked everyone out of my life. any text i get i ignore, i have my phone on silent all day, i deleted my fb and any social media stuff. all that stuff spikes my anxiety. anything i read, any video game i play, any tiny bit of excitement can send me hurling into a horrific breathing attack.

i apparently cant go lower then 1.5 pills. once i took 2 just because it rained and i couldnt sleep from the pain. so i guess ill keep at least tapering and sticking on the 1.5 until this anxiety goes down and then go to 1.

this f'n anxiety man i hate it! one day i tried pruning the tree on my patio just to see if i could go outside. nope, about a half hour into it i was gasping for air ready to blackout. the blackout parts of this are the worst. i cant keep my time occupied, i cant go out, because i cant breathe correctly and my pulse shoots so f'n high my head becomes so hot that i just cant do anything.

ive lost a half a year of my life already trying to get better and doing the right thing. i hear all these success stories and how fast people get better but with me its taking 10 times longer.

if this doesnt pan out and work i dunno wth im going to do. i cant sit on my couch another half a year im going insane. i feel like im 17 again when my anxiety was so bad before pills that i would drive to a mall and get such bad anxiety i wouldnt go inside i would just drive back home and say maybe next time. those stupid pain pills were the only thing that got rid of my anxiety the past 10 years.

im so frusterated at this point. my progress seems like crap

damascus1986

sounds like withdrawls from taking a lesser amount to me. i had convinced myself i was in pain from my broken hip alot of it really was side efects from my opiate use. id suggest detox, rehab and 6-6 months clean from all drugs to let your body clear alot of that stuff out. I've been where you are vicious cycle with no way out.
Could be some PAWS involved too.

The best way to get freedom is to stop using.

damascus1986

Xanax caused me wierd widrawls kinda like the worst flu i ever had.

CobraCommander

i have noticed that as well that now i think the pills were actually causing me more pain before. i was so afraid before to cut down or get off them because my pain was so bad i was in a huge fear the pain would never go away. im pretty close to being off them, i wanna save the rehab route for last option because well i dont trust those places honestly lol and i dont want them substituting one drug for another drug. so im trying to do this on my own because i feel i know my body better then drs do at this point seeing their lack of knowledge and how careless they have treated me lately.

did you rehab or taper? and if you tapered was it a long process? i have a friend helping me and she said it took her nearly a year to taper and had almost all the same symptoms of me.

i cut the grass yesterday it was my first time outside doing anything (except trying to prune) in a long time, i only had a half a pill in the a.m. and half in the morning. cut the grass around 8pm and by the time i was done i was dizzy, breathing hard, and ready to pass out. at 1130pm i noticed my neighbors garage door open so i walked next door and hit his electronic lock, by the time i got back home couldnt breath again. its really quite annoying lol. i also had a migraine that lasted 2 days the day before yesterday.

im still being optimistic that this stuff will get less and less and start to balance out so i can cut to 0 pills and have 0 problems.

hearing that others had long tapering and long withdrawals kinda helps me feel a bit more optimistic and relaxed

CobraCommander

yikes after reading more on paws, it says withdrawals can last 7 months to a year. my main issue right now is the breathing/anxiety which is one. i dont seem to have any other paw issues from the list. man this is a long road i wanna drive off a cliff lol

Tiredofdrugs

Hi Cobra!

I've C/T'ed off the pain meds the last several times I've come off them. I always purposedly put myself into a situation where I'd run out before my next refill! That usually gave me a week to clear them out of my system with no way to get more! That's what worked for me! Because once I had a week off them? There was no way I was going back on them!

I'd had the breathing anxiety problems while on the pain meds too! There were times I'd get so anxious over things I had to do? I wouldn't be able to breathe! Like doing the physical training test in the ARNG! Doing pushups, situps and running two miles. All of the event's were timed and if I didn't pass? I had to do all three all over again! No matter if I only failed one of the tests!

There are also things used in homes for cleaning and air freshners that can cause breathing problems. As well as moldy areas in and outside the home. And of course pets!

I went thru rehab back in the 80's for 30 days. It was the BEST thing that happened to me. It gave me tools and resources to survive all these CT events I've gone thru. Don't be afraid of them! Or down on them!

Glad you have someone to help you thru this!

TOD