esctasy am i addicted

[help me]

i have taken x for about 6 to 8 weeks at least 1 time a week now i cant go more then 7 days without throwing up diareah chills sweating craving. even hearing the word make me throw up. is this physical or mental and how other then rehab can i over come this. i tried this weekend not to take it i was very sick by saturday i scared my friend so bad she went and bought me x. as soon as i seen it i threw up and immeditly took it. now its monday and the nasua has started agaiin along with the shakes. i dont wanna do it anymore but im scared. what do i do.

[jinx230]

It sounds like its definitely mental, but there seems to be some physical element as well. I don't know anything about ecstasy addiction - I'm sure other people here can help you out to figure what you can do to help your situation.

In the meantine - search this site and the web to see what information you can find out specifically about ecstasy addiction, and how to help yourself.

Also - if you're feeling that bad, try to get plenty of rest, and definitely drink alot of water - it sounds like you need it with all of your symptoms.

Hang in there - everyone here will help you out.

~Jinx

[margo]

Hi Help Me, and welcome. I'd urge you to see your doctor and tell the truth about your use of ecstasy. There's no way of telling what we're ingesting when we consume illegal drugs and your symptoms could be physical, mental, or both. Don't be scared to tell your doctor - addiction is a common problem and your doctor should know best to know how to help you with these symptoms.

As far as whether you're an addict, that's really a question only you can answer, but take a look at this link - it may help you to decide:

http://www.cstone.net/users/pasc/problem.html

[bikewench]

Hey Helpme...

Welcome to Sober Recovery.

I used MDA compulsively before it was known as ecstasy...

I found this link that has many articles about the drug... so hopefully you can find some info to help you.

http://www.ecstasy.org/info/index.html

I do agree with Margo though about seeing a doctor... you never know... it could be a problem totally unrelated to using... or it could be aggravated by using...

I hope you let your fear motivate you into going for help... cause we can support you... but no one can kick it for you.

I hope you stick around .. let us know how your doing.. ;o)

[help me]

i wanted to say thank you for the links and the support. after comin to the site today i called a few of my friends who also use x alot. and i have come to relize im not alone. they are feeling the same way and we have decided to help eachother stay clean. even my friend who helped me support my habbit when i was sick and couldnt afford the x. i feel a lil better now knowing im not alone and i wont be alone during my withdraws. my bf tried to get me to stop using x a month ago. i started using it because alot of my friends said they became closer with their men when they were on it. i really wanted to fix my relationship with it but it only caused more problems. i pushed it on him too and would argue until he did it with me. i should have relized i had a problem then but i guess i wasnt ready to admitt it or just didnt care. he isnt a very supportive person and i guess that is one of the reasons i wanted x so bad cuz when we were on it he was the person i wanted to be with so loving and nice. i talked to him tonight and he was mean about it. he said he didnt care what i was goin threw i did it to myself and that this house better stay clean even threw withdraws no matter how sick i got. it almost pushed me to making a call. BUT I DIDNT. instead i sat down and asked him to talk to me like a human not a peice of trash. he is right i blame him for everything. and he tried to help me already but i wouldnt listen i just snuck behind his back and bought it anyway no matter what i had to sacrifice. i fell shame and alot of guilt. and the reason i dont have support at home is because when it was offered to me i didnt take it. but after our talk today i am hopeing he will be more supportive. he isnt addicted thank god i wouldnt be able to forgive myself if he would have been. i pushed it on him not relizing i had a problem. im just thankfull that i woke up before it was too late. this is really hard especilly since i dont like to admit when im wrong. i just hope my friends are as serious about this as i am. i really need to get away from it. and 2 of my best friends in the whole world are in the same situation as me and one of them feels responsible for my addiction because she is the one who talked me into it. but i just told her the only way for her to help me now is not to sell it to me anymore for one and for 2 she has to stop too. its nobody's fault but my own for my addiction. sorry if im babbling on i just have alot to get off my chest. and this really seems to help me say i cant do it. and puting it in words and being able to come back to the site and see what i and others have wrote really helps me when i have that urge. im just goin to take it one day at a time. the sickness doesnt get bad unless i dont use for at least 3 to 5 days and its hasnt been that long yet. but i am getting nausiated already and i think it will only get worse alot quicker if i use again. so im goin to be strong and just express my feelings here. im scared of meetings and phone calls to the na hotline. so all i ask is some kind words from ppl who have been in my shoes before. or have experinced the symtoms i am having due to drugs. once again thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for your support and kind words. i will keep you posted on my progress. i guess the best thing for me to do is post daily until i have it under control.

[bikewench]

Hey HM...

Way to lay it out...
That's what I have to do as well... write it right out of me...


Well...
I guess you know now that the only way out is through...
The withdrawals will pass... if you don't pick up again.

but i just told her the only way for her to help me now is not to sell it to me anymore for one and for 2 she has to stop too.

I hope she's listening... ;o)

I know what you mean about getting your guy high on the love drug just to get that yummy affection though...
To bad we have to drug them eh... lol....

Do you have any kind of a spiritual connection you can lean on?

You will get unlimited love and support here HM... and you'll also get the bare a$$ed truth as well...
I know how scary it is to walk into the doors of a 12 step meeting... trust me... but... we have to be prepared to go any lengths .. cause addiction is cunning , baffling and powerful. Hopefully you'll not have to experience that.

For sure... it's 24 hours. Can you not use for the next 24?

I guess the best thing for me to do is post daily until i have it under control.

Sounds like a plan...

Hey look.. your very own smiley...

[margo]

Hey HM - good to see you come back. Thanks for sharing your story with us - you're among friends and we'll support you through this - you can do it, just one day at a time. You're not alone, and we do care.

Keep coming back!

[labyrinth]

Hi help, I just wanted say a few quick things. I use to use x as well and am very familier with it. It is not physicaly addicting. But who knows what u are realy taking. If you are taking different pills and having this problem then it is all mental. If it is the same type of pill each time then there is a chance that there is a substance in there that is causing this. But unless your dealer picked up several jars of the same type this is highly unlikely. I have several friends who still roll and some of them have been doing it for well over 5 years and (funny thing I actualy asked one how many he thinks he has taken tonight) one friend said he has consumed around 1500 pills. And the way this guy rolls he has to be pretty close on that number. Never once have I heard of those symptoms happening every time you roll. The day or two after a roll these symptoms sometimes occur but they are not withdrawal it is just a x hangover. Also x can cause sever anxiety and your symptoms can be caused by this anxiety. I know that the depression and anxiety I suffered from after a roll could last for weeks.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE STOP!!!!!
my life has been utterly destroyed by taking a bad pill, My memeory almost does not exists, I can no longer comprehend anthing but simple subject matter. I also suffer from HPPD (go to www.HPPD.com to find out more...realy go look at what can happen) I also suffer from severe depersonalzation (go to www.depersonalzation.com and look it up IT IS A LIVING HELL.....but check my spelling first I can no longer spell very good The anxiety and depression I have are down right scary. I use to think that suciede was for wimps. I now think of it daily after X.

The people on the board might not like me for telling you this but I will anyway. IF you roll, Make sure to stay cool (MDMA is more neurotoxic to your body when it over heats).4 to 6 hours after a roll take a ssri (PAXIL ZOLOFT ect) this also has been proven to help prevent some of its neurotoxic affects. Never take more than one pill at a time and if you do (I did) never take different types of pills NEVER. (i did that too). The different drugs that are in each pill will make it more deadly to your brain. But most of all JUST DONT DO IT!!!. Out of the 50 or so hardcore rollers (myself included) that I know. NOT ONE of them wishs they started rolling, and almost all have developed mental problems. Its your life to do with as you please. So please dont screw it up. Feel free to PM me. I chat on yahoo under labyrinth1748 Ask me anything u want to know about the drug anytime!

steve

[labyrinth]

How are today? I have been thinking alot about you and am very concerned. Here is a couple of sites you should vist. www.erowid.org go to MDMA and look under healt (health )problems READ them these are real people with real problems becasue of MDMA. The one post the most relates to myself is by Numbgirls (numbgirl) called still trying to wake up..Go to www.safe.org (www.dancesafe.org)go to EBOARD and click on neurotoxity look for a post my (by)TeddydeChamps, you will see some by myself (some made by myself) under labyrinth + some # but I cant rem them right now. I left the mistakes in my post and the corrections in () for a reason. This is how my mind thinks now pretty pathatic aint it.


Take care

steve

[help me]

im ok just very tired and really not feeling good now its now been 4 days and still not using. i slept the day away yesterday. just wanted to let ya know. got to go now im getting sick.

[Toni B]

Hi!!! I just need someone to talk to......my boyfriend is a cocaine addict and has been clean for 2 years now and just fell yesterday............it is a nightmare to go through this again with him and he of course says now he will go on strong again to stay clean and continue to stay sober once again. It is very hard for me to trust him once again.......we are also in the process of buying a house together.....just someone to that needs a little inspiration....I love this guy!

[skunkape138]

You should get to meeting. Its the only way to do it. You were probably taking mdma with dope as well as i have taken it to. Its sounds like something similar because you normaly will not withdraw from X.

[help me]

Originally Posted by skunkape138

You should get to meeting. Its the only way to do it. You were probably taking mdma with dope as well as i have taken it to. Its sounds like something similar because you normaly will not withdraw from X.

ok what dope are you talking about i have had several things refured to as dope.

[help me]

i also wanted to let everyone know i am doing much better. its been 11 days since i used im feeling better now the sickness only comes and goes now thank god. i am the only servivor of my friends. the rest had a relapse. im trying so hard to make them understand what we were doing to ourselves.

[servicejunkie]

I hate to tell you this help me, but its the truth. Your "friends" will convince you to use much quicker than you will convincing them to stop. Save your own arse, but don't try this alone. You have to change the people, places, and things that you associate with using. In order to get fu@ked, first you have to get into position!! I used to be VERY BIG into eating rolls and that whole scene way back when, I ate rolls on at least 100 different occasions. I have seen many people suffer brain dammage and other ill effects from consumption of MDA and MDMA, but never as severe physical symptoms you are explaining. Check out NA and meet some people who understand you, therefore can best help you. By they way, there is NO DOPE (heroin) in extacy, being that it is not an orally active subtance unless in VERY large quantities, and is way to expensive, and has not shown up in thousands of pills tested. Just a stupid urban legend. That would not be causing withdrawl symptoms, yours seem to be mental. Congrats. on the 11 days, keep fighting and keep comin' back!!
Mike