going to stop percs/lortab

[SadieMae]

Like everyone else, I never expected to be an addict. Was always a casual pot user, and pills recreationally. But for some reason, this past year, I have gotten hooked on Percocets. Ive taken Lortab in the past with no problem. I liked them when I had them but didn't mind if I didn't. Hubby is a perc addict and has a steady supplier. I found that I like them. Even though hubby is unemployed and I'm the breadwinner/bill payer, I "let" him talk me into paying for more pills. If he gets some, so do I. And I like them. But after over a year, I've gotten to the point that we have too much to lose to keep on this way. My average usage isn't as bad as some that I have read (no offense). I pretty much use three or four 10 mg percs a day. Of course I can take more, but this is average. Right now, I only have about 8 Lortab 10's. I'm hoping I can wean on a 3 / 2 / 1 / 1/ 1/2 / 1/2 dose. I plan to use the Thomas recipe. I am currently on (prescribed!) Neurontin, Robaxin and Mobic daily for chronic pain. I also have a hot tub. I plan to use Sleepytime tea and Valerian at night. Anyone have anything to add? Am I being too confident? If I was by myself, I wouldnt have a problem, but my hubby is more addicted than I and has much less self control that I. He says he is in this with me, but I doubt it. We've tried it before, just talking about it, and nothing happens. But partly that is because the minute HE brings it up, I whip out the check book. I need much more control in that department. Also, some days when my pain is just unmanagable, its easier to just give in. How can I find the strength to pretty much go this alone?

[Melvins99]

Thats almost exactly what I was on for almost 2 years, you wont have too much of a problem, just keep your current mindset..dont get me wrong though its hard at times, but no heavy withdrawals for me at least. I just up and stopped though, threw what I had left in the toilet and set F that, need ma brain back! I found my self waking up soaked in sweat, and some heavy-ish dizzy spells..thats about it..Im been off 7 days now.
Good luck to ya, hopefully your husband will follow suit w/ you..that'll make things a little harder for you if your watching him.

[Sugah]

I wish I had something more encouraging for you, but, SadieMae, I couldn't do it alone, nor could I do it with someone still using in the house. How about you and hubby hitting an NA meeting to see if you can relate?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

[SadieMae]

Originally Posted by Sugah

I wish I had something more encouraging for you, but, SadieMae, I couldn't do it alone, nor could I do it with someone still using in the house. How about you and hubby hitting an NA meeting to see if you can relate?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

You know, I hate to sound like I'm wimping out or not taking this seriously, but I really don't think the meetings are for me. For one thing, hubby would be horribly opposed. I mean, its not like he rules me or anything, but I obviously have a codependency problem going on. He went to AA meetings with his first wife and has told me "never again". and yes, I could go alone but he is such a whiney baby when left alone. Here again my codependency rears its ugly head. AND, I've been to, well, one NA meeting a long time ago and hated it. But I've tried to quit using before, but totally on my own. I never even tried to use internet support before and I'm hoping with the education I have gained over the past few weeks of researching this, and joining a few support groups on line, plus my new found strength (I hope) in not giving in to him, that I can do it this time. I feel strong right now, but of course I have a couple of Lortabs in me. I just ask that you all stand behind me and give me strength and I would greatly appreciate it! I doubt there is anything I or you can do for hubby, but hopefully if I shut off the money train, he might see that I am serious!

[fxshcakes]

Hey, I have faith in you! I'd try to just gradually step down from the lortabs and percs. Just take it one day at a time, putting one foot in front of the other. I'm not a member of NA, but have been off of meth for almost a year. When you have a craving, just try to advert your attention to something else--reading, talking to someone about it, writing about it, whatev works for you! And the best thing to do is lose the numbers of all of your connections, otherwise, it's probably not going to work. Staying away from old "using buddies" is essential, as well. I never believed it before, but I do now. Best wishes!
~L

[change4penny]

Hi, I'm a recovering opiate/cocaine addict, 8 months clean. Before rehab, I was taking 30,10mg hydro or oxycodones per day, plus using an 8ball of coke on top of it.
Thank God I have a supportive husband. I don't know if I could have done this if he were using. Good luck with that!
Welcome to the boards. Keep posting. You'll get a lot of good advice and support here.

Penny

[SadieMae]

Originally Posted by fxshcakes

Hey, I have faith in you! I'd try to just gradually step down from the lortabs and percs. Just take it one day at a time, putting one foot in front of the other. I'm not a member of NA, but have been off of meth for almost a year. When you have a craving, just try to advert your attention to something else--reading, talking to someone about it, writing about it, whatev works for you! And the best thing to do is lose the numbers of all of your connections, otherwise, it's probably not going to work. Staying away from old "using buddies" is essential, as well. I never believed it before, but I do now. Best wishes!
~L

Thanks. I've done a real quick taper. I only have Lortab left. I"m gonna to
3 1/2 today, 2 tomorrow, then 1 then 1. Unfortunately, hubby has the connections #'s, they are "friends" of his. I could avoid them no problem but not him. He will find a way to get pills, I know it. Even without money. Don't have using buddies either. See we are those "functional" addicts (like everyone elseLOL!) that no one would suspect has a problem. Had a little bit of RLS last night, but not too bad. Thanks for the advice. Keep clean yourself, huh? Good going! Almost a year? Wow.

[SadieMae]

Originally Posted by change4penny

Hi, I'm a recovering opiate/cocaine addict, 8 months clean. Before rehab, I was taking 30,10mg hydro or oxycodones per day, plus using an 8ball of coke on top of it.
Thank God I have a supportive husband. I don't know if I could have done this if he were using. Good luck with that!
Welcome to the boards. Keep posting. You'll get a lot of good advice and support here.

Penny

Yeah, people are lucky if they don't have to try to get their partner clean at the same time. Particularly if they aren't of the same mind set. He says he will, but we all know that addicts lie. But I'm gonna try. I have to. At least if I shut off the money train, it will help a little bit. Good luck on your recovery.

[SadieMae]

Well, I'm pretty proud of myself. Being the only breadwinner in the family and thus the one who finances the addiction, money has been difficult to say the least. Most of the time, we get our supply from our supplier, but recently I have been having an exacerbation of my chronic pain as well as a new problem, so a few weeks ago I got a legal RX for Lortab, which is what I am using to wean. I sat down to do the bills and its amazing. After not buying drugs from a supplier for almost a week, we actually have money to pay bills! Wow! I am a little behind in my mortgage and very behind in a loan, but all of the other bills, electric, phone, water, etc are PAID! Of course I'm broke now for the next week but hey, can't buy pills without money huh? Hubby hasn't done well on his taper, he is out and in fact asked for one of mine. I gave him a half and still have enough for my planned taper. Dear God, I hope this works out. I really need to get clean.

[change4penny]

Sadiemae...Yeah, the financial rewards are a plus for sure. Especially for me, I also have chronic pain, but the 120 I got from the doctor didn't last a week, so I had to buy them off a dealer. Plus, I was spending money on coke every day!
It's a great feeling to have the bills paid and plenty of groceries! Hell, I even went to the mall this past weekend and dropped some money! I never could or cared to before I got clean. Sobriety is very rewarding in more ways than you can imagine.

As for your husband...Lead by example. Most importantly...You do YOU and Let HIM do HIM.
Good luck, and God bless,

Penny

[SadieMae]

Thanks Penny. You're right. I can't do him, so I'll just do me!

[change4penny]

SadieMae

Now you've got it! Keep posting and let us know you progress!

Hang in there,

Penny

[bval]

Hey Sadie, welcome to the boards.

First off, I'm curious ...How's that weaning you were talking about coming along? You did 3 on sunday, 2 yesterday, and today it's down to 1. Right?

I just have to say ... I don't think your plan is going to be enough, esp. not in the scenario where you're living w/someone who's likely to just go right along using. What you're describing is about as far from optimal a situation as I can think of when it comes to getting clean. I don't mean to be a downer, or discouraging, but it's gonna be real tough under these conditions.

If you can't get to any meetings, at least order some good recovery literature (the NA basic text is a good start) to read. I would start participating in some online recovery meetings, not just posting on these boards. And I'd also consider getting out of the house for about 4-7 days, if you can figure out a place to go ... parents or siblings place, somewhere where people are clean and sober ... to get through the detox at least.

Best of luck to you in any case, and keep posting

[SadieMae]

I am so FREAKING PROUD OF MYSELF! I'm still weaning Lortab. But the past two days, I haven't even taken my allotted last half for the day. I need it more in the morning, for pain, seriously and if I haven't needed it, I haven't taken it. I put it off and put it off and if it gets to late, there is no sense in taking it because it just keeps me up at night. I had good energy at work yesterday, surprisingly because I didn't sleep well the night before. Last night I slept well and woke up early this morning. Had a little RLS last night but not bad. I still have 2 1/2 Lortab left.

Hubby? Not so good. I gave in as far as he is concerned. He didn't wean like I did so he is in bad shape. I gave him enough $ to get 4 Percs. So he can "wean" he says. Yeah, right. He leaves to go to the dealer and wants me to go! Uh, NO! (Yay for me!). So he is gone for hours and finally calls me in a panic, telling me he is lost and paranoid and needs moral support. WTF? What did you do, I ask? Oh, the dealer also gave him a 1/2 Roxie. We decided long ago not to do Roxies and haven't. Well, I got mad about it and the fact that if his dealer is "GIVING" him stuff, why the hell have I been PAYING for it then? So I hung up on him. He comes home with the song and dance with which we are familiar: I'm sorry, I'll never do it again, this is the last time, I'll never go there again, bla, bla, bla.... And then he asks, do you want a Perc?! Jeez! NO! (Yay for me again!). And you know, I really wasn't tempted?

I do feel really good. I've pretty much already had most of the stuff for the Thomas recipe which I have been taking for the past two weeks, not exactly but close. Got most of the rest of the stuff last night except for Tyrosine, which I'll have to look for. The only thing I'm afraid of is, why am I doing so well? I know its only been a few days but still. Other than a little RLS, no other problems. I've been on steroids for the past week and a half and I wonder if that is helping. It does seem to give me energy and help my pain. Could that be it? Will I come down like a comet when I'm finished? I hope not. But I take alot of other meds for my chronic pain, which I think could be helping as well: Neurontin, Robaxin, Wellbutrin and Zanaflex at night, in addition to Valerian and the thomas recipe stuff.

But anyway, I'm not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth and Im gonna be proud of myself for today!

[Nallabelle]

I think the reason you are doing so well is because you want this. It might get harder physically and mentally as your withdrawal progresses. Also, if your husband doesnt quit then relapse will be staring you in the face. Doesnt sound like he wants it as bad as you do, Im sorry.
I got l-tyrosine at GNC not cheap but it lasts forever. I know people that still take it and it does help. Good luck and stay focused!

[hopefully tryin]

Welcome!
Good job so far. I don't want to be negative but I gotta say. This is going to be super hard in the long run of it. Actually, for me the hardest part wasn't getting off the pills..it was staying off the pills. I can't tell you how many times I quit either c/t or weaned just to start back up again because I had no outside support of people who know what I am going through.
If you don't want to go to NA then what about one on one therapy with an addiction specialist?
You're story just sounds so familiar to me. I also once only took 3-4 pills a day when I realized I had a problem. I would try to quit, and would be successful for a short while just to start back up again. My addiction finally took me down 4 years later and at that point I was taking upwards of 25-30 pills per day!!
What worked for me was inpatient detox (5 days) and follow up support. I'm going on one yr this month and I feel better and more alive now than I ever have!
I wish you the best of luck and please if you can get some face to face support. This internet thing is great but nothing compares to one on one face 2 face help and support.

[bval]

I don't mean to belittle your accomplishment, cause you're doing awesome, but just as an explanation ... you're getting off of a 30-40mg habit, and doing it the 'right way' with weaning down and such ... what I mean to say is, you're not having that rough a time because your habit was not extremely bad to begin with, and you're going about the kicking in the right way.

I should add that neurontin is very helpful with withdrawal symptoms, my sub doctor gave me that stuff, along with clonidine, and the two of them together helped a TON.

A small word of caution though, DO be prepared to feel bad for a few days when you actually completely stop. There is a SIZABLE difference between 'some' and 'none' in terms of how you feel when you're addicted to opioids, even when that 'some' is very very little, as it is in your case.

But there's not much you can do about that, you've set yourself up in the optimal situation (so to speak), such that it won't be *that* bad when you do stop. I'm just saying, it'll be noticeable when you quit completely no matter how low you take your dosage, so just be prepared for that.

If you ask me, the time is very near for you to do the symbolic flush of your last pill or two, and push on through to the endgame...

I'm very proud of your accomplishment thus far. It takes a lot of strength to wean all on your own, esp. with someone else using in the same house. You are a tough cookie!

One last thing ... roxies, percs, they're the same exact drug, so I'm confused as to why you guys had this no 'roxy' rule? It doesn't make sense to me ... if you can get roxies cheaper than percs, it makes no sense to buy percs. All you're doing by doing so is increasing the damage to your liver from the tylenol additive that is in percs, but not in roxies ... they're both instant release oxycodone, so ...

[SadieMae]

Hi, BV! Thanks for your words. I'm going well. I had my last dose of Lortab 5 mg, yesterday morning and I'm fine. Slept well, no physical or mental wd's. Was a little tired yesterday but thursdays are my longest day of the week anyway, so it may have been that. Yes, I think between the Thomas recipe, Neurontin and Wellbutrin, not to mention Valerian, I'm fine. I know percs and roxies are the same thing, but their affect (on me at least) is totally different. The roxies just blast me with energy and last a long time, the percs are a lot more subtler. I realize about the tylenol aspect, which was my excuse to take the roxies to begin with. But they were much harder to quit than percs. and percs were much harder to quit than lortab. So, you are right, I think I've gone about this correctly and feel great.

Hubby isn't doing quite so well, he is moody and cranky and not very happy with me, since I am the money train in this house. But he is sleeping a little better due to the thomas recipe/herbal and supplement "cocktail" that I give him at night. If he would have weaned like I did, he wouldn't be feeling as bad as he does, but hey, what do I know, huh?

So, I'm just gonna keep on keeping on and stay strong. Thanks to all for your encouragement!

[christin1225]

Originally Posted by SadieMae

If he would have weaned like I did, he wouldn't be feeling as bad as he does, but hey, what do I know, huh?

Sadie... glad to hear that you are doing so well. It's great that you're helping hubby out too. When you give him a hug next time, give him two... tell him Christin sends one. I couldn't taper either. There are many for whom tapering is simply impossible. You are very fortunate to have been able to taper and your husband is fortunate to have you to help care for him. Keep up the good work! I wish you both well.

[SadieMae]

Thanks so much Christin. Hubby isn't doing well. Cranky and mad at me. And I don't know, its like he is brain damaged lately or something. Difficulty concentrating, slurs a little, memory difficulties. And he does have some Lortab, so I don't think its wd's although he does prefer the percs. He is acting like he is on downers, falls asleep early even if I don't give him his nightly "coctail" of valerian, Lyrica, Flexeril, herbs, vitamins and minerals. Hubby doesn't feel fortunate to have me. He is cranky and is making me cranky. Plus I have been on steroids for the past few weeks to help with some new nerve damage and pain I have been having, so it makes me cranky and then I "react" to his attitude. But I'm feeling fine. thanks to all.