Lizrox

I went through 28 day rehab back in 2007 (vicodin). Yes I relapsed after (amphetamines); but I am now almost a year clean.

The hospital has Alumni Meetings every saturday; and I thought I would get my self up and go tomorrow. It's when you just go and "tell your story."

They said no to me coming because I am not going to AA/NA..

Do you think thats right?? I have gained so much knowledge the past year; why does a requirement to go to a meeting have to be I am actively involved in AA/NA??

any opinions would be appreciated..

FT

Well, in my opinion that is just CRAP.

Inserting "exclusivity" into the recovery process is only going to put off quite a few people who already feel like "outsiders."

These people could use your experience to their benefit, and I would be inclined to respond to such a rebuff with a big F--K OFF.

Their loss, kiddo. You are SO as important as they are. What community do they think they are there to serve? If I were on their funding committee, they would now be OFF my list of who gets a grant next year.

Geez.

sailorjohn

Have been to any number of 'open' AA meetings-what you're talking about, right?-and have never witnessed a person that didn't at least claim to be a member give the open talk.

Would you think it rude if any other group refused to let a non-member deliver a lecture/speech/presentation to the members?

totfit

I certainly don't agree with this, though it doesn't surprise me. This is also ammunition for some insurance companies to de-certify some of treatments centers. I think often times some treatment centers are still not in the 21st Century and get "program" and "treatment" confused. It is a shame that they are so closed minded as the result is that there are a large number of folks that could have been helped, but were instead harmed, by lack of options.

FT

"Would you think it rude if any other group refused to let a non-member deliver a lecture/speech/presentation to the members?"

What lecture/speech/presentation are you referring to?

She just said, "It's when you just go and "tell your story."

When did it start happening that we are not interested in hearing other people's stories of struggle and recovery?

This is the kind of stuff that turns people OFF to NA/AA. I was under the impression that meetings were open to ALL people, in ALL stages of recovery. I heard nothing from her that indicated she was AGAINST going to NA/AA in any way.

stugotz

It really doesnt matter what we think, its what you think that matters.

sailorjohn

Well, since you're going off on a foamy little tangent here.

Please quote my original post and show where I wrote 'that she was against NA/AA in any way'. Or even implied as much.

Can you say 'projecting'.

FT

"Have been to any number of 'open' AA meetings-what you're talking about, right?-and have never witnessed a person that didn't at least claim to be a member give the open talk."

By implication, your statement suggests that she needs to "claim" some kind of allegiance to the group as a prerequisite to offering her voice there. THAT is crap. THAT is what turns people off. THAT suggests that she can't speak unless she aligns herself with AA/NA philosophy. For these people to outright EXCLUDE her is ridiculous and belies the philosophy that 12 step programs espouse.

Personally, I think NA/AA is great. I have no criticisms of 12 step philosophy, or anyone I've every met who represents, or claims to represent them. I'm not including you in that group.

You are toeing the line of being offensive. I think this forum has room for others' opinions without being subjected to name calling, or patronizing rhetoric.

glitter

I'm not understanding the OP.

How do the people at the rehab center know you want to attend this alumni meeting?

Did you actually "graduate" from their program, making you an "alumni"?

sailorjohn

Kudos, you actually quoted my post. Now for the good part

What exact implication would that be? I told you my experience. Care to share yours?

Well, it's their group, they decide who gets to share. They have something called 'group conscience' where the members of the group decide how the group conducts it's meetings. Are you going to argue that? My guess would be that you've never heard of it. Tough having facts get in the way of a good argument.

You mean those recovered alcoholics/addicts, correct?

Maybe you can quote exactly what these 12 step philosophies have to say regarding this particular subject. Please spare the opinions.
I can quote you what AA has to say on the subject.

Ouch. Lucky for me I read your profile.

glitter

It's my experience that an alumni meeting in a treatment center is NOT the same as an AA or NA meeting. While H&I brings meetings into treatment centers (hospitals), an alumni meeting is held at the treatment center itself and run by the ALUMNI of the treatment center. The meeting may begin with the serenity prayer, pass a basket for donations, have a secretary and a chairperson and group shares, but (again, in my experience) there are NO traditional AA/NA readings (traditions and/or steps).

If someone didn't actualy graduate a program, they are not really an alumni, right?

Maybe I'll start attending alumni activities at Harvard School of Medicine. I never graduated from that school and I'm not a doctor, but I am a nurse.....close enough, eh?

stugotz

I graduated prison but they wont let me do the jail meetings....... Sorry couldnt resist.

sailorjohn

Honestly don't know exactly what sort of meeting the op was referring to, they never actually said that it was/wasn't an AA/NA meeting.

I have attended countless meetings at hospitals that had inpatient/detox programs, they were AA, not affiliated with the hospitals beyond the fact that the facilities lent them the use of rooms to conduct the meetings.

Funny all this, I've attended AA meetings in Florida, the 'classroom' type, if you weren't a regular 'member'-someone that didn't attend the meetings regularly-they probably would not call on you to share. Regardless of your affiliation.

glitter

I think the big difference here is that the OP stated that this is an alumni meeting. That usually means "alumni" of a treatment program. If this is the case, the alumni can have any rules and do whatever they want, including excluding those who attended 4 years ago and who may not have "graduated" the treatment program. This is why I asked those clarifying questions to the OP in an earlier post (#9).

dreamscape

I advise against anger, it'll cause resentment. Resentment is deadly to the addict or alcoholic.

FT

Sailorjohn:

Thankfully, I deleted my profile for this exact reason. I don't care to engage in banter with fanatics.

No thanks for the invitation to engage me. Are you sure you aren't roomies with OOI?

FT

I just wanted to support the OP. I apologize if I have insulted other posters.

That said, adios to this thread.

PaperDolls

I second this .... no matter if they're right or wrong don't let yourself get angry over something like this ..... it just isn't worth it. Not for this chick anyway.

Anna

Hey Gang,

Let's try to keep this focused on Lizrox question and stay away from the personal jabs.

Timebuster

I did a inpatient rehab at Seabrook House in NJ, a 12 step base rehab facility. Seabrook House programs are grounded in the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA). As a patient at Seabrook, the structured daily schedule consists of mandatory NA/AA meetings.

Twelve times per year, alumni are invited back for a day long celebration to share their experience, strength and hope with the current patients in house. The alumni gatherings take place the last Sunday of every month. These events are for alumni only, no family, friends, you must be discharged as a patient for at least 90 days. The morning begins with alumni group sharing, followed by lunch. The afternoon ends when H&I brings a meeting into Seabrook with a 12 step speaker, where all alumni are invited to share.

To share as a speaker in a meeting, it is suggested to have at least 6 months of continuous sobriety/clean time. The NA member chosen to speak at a meeting needs to be someone who is working and living the NA program of recovery. To share in the meeting the only requirement is a desire to stop using.

Seabrook House Alumni Guidelines

Six months of continuous clean and sober time

Is an alumnus of Seabrook House

Regularly attends 12 step meetings

Works with a sponsor

Is available to meet the newcomer within 24 to 48 hours upon arrival and can take them to a meeting

Is available by phone to stay connected with the newcomer.

Seabrook House Case Manager then identifies an alumnus who fits these criteria.

I only attended one alumni meeting at Seabrook, and that was many moons ago. But as you can see the program and guidelines are pretty rigged.

Lizrox, I'm sorry about your situation, but before you catch a resentment for life, why dont you call up and get a better understanding of the Hospital rehab alumni guidelines. Sometimes all it takes is some clarification of a situation so that we dont our undies in a bunch.

TB