Codeine Chronicles Part II

[lugnut]

Prayers from me to your ex LB! I am sure he will pull through. I dont know all the details but I will pray for you and your family tonight.!

As for cigs...I have tried to quit so many times. I took that chantix and was doing great but come to find out I had a bad reaction.. It made me suicidal (which is not me) I love myself to much lol..
So pack to at least a pack a day.. Impurrpect...as for the price I told myself If they ever got to 2 bucks a pack I would quit, then 3 bucks then 4 bucks (see a pattern here?) I heard they are harder to quit than H??? But they are going up to almost 5 bucks a pack here in Indiana plus I go outside and smoke because of my kids and at -35 below 0 it really is cold out there lol..

LB does the gum help you with the crabbiness?
And Vinter does the patches seem to be helping allot? I have been smoking for 22 years so it might be rough. Maybe everyone can take a pledge here and we can quit smoking??

I know my body can use it.

[Impurrfect]

I don't know about H, but I know I've had a harder time quitting the cigs than crack, but then I stay away from the crack. Everyone I work with, not only smokes, but smokes the same brand I do, so it's not like I can stay away from it. My cigs are $3/pack, right now, but considering how little I make at my job, that's still a lot.

Guess I need to set a date and go for it. Just wish I wasn't so crabby when I do it!! The meds I'm on for my migraines and PTSD decrease my appetite, so maybe I won't eat everything that's not nailed down, but gotta figure out something to make me less witchy.

Sorry to hijack your thread, LB...how are YOU doing? Are there such things as cheap tickets to Bejing? Any time I've had to fly somewhere emergently, I've had to pay a small fortune! I wish you luck!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

[Vintersemestre]

If you think that's bad your average pack of popular cigarettes in Quebec is around $9 CAD. Generic natural tobacco cigarettes can be had for $10 a carton though.

[Dee74]

Cigs are $12-15 AUD in Australia, or so I'm reliably informed.
I wonder where all that moneys going....

I really hope your ex improves LB - I'll be thinking of you and the kiddies.
D

[christin1225]

Originally Posted by lugnut

Lugnut...as for the price I told myself If they ever got to 2 bucks a pack I would quit, then 3 bucks then 4 bucks (see a pattern here?)

I swore that once I couldn't buy 2 packs for a dollar that I would quit (they were .45 back in the early 70s). I was about nine and finally quit for good in 2000. I'M STILL PRAYING, LB.

[emmer]

Hey LB, I am on clean day 2.
When to NA last night and it was a good meeting, I was blue though and felt like crying there.
I haven't had any cravings at all this time, but I have had some bad headaches.
I took a white tag last night too.

Last time at "this time in quiting" .. I felt miserable, but this time I feel a bit sad and anxious but not miserable.

I wanted to share something I keep reading and reading, it's from the AA big book, and I find it comforting and profounding .................it causes my spirit to be at peace. ..........Please read

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.

I came across this on the gratitude forum and will keep it close to my heart.

[lostbutterfly]

That's lovely Emmer. We shall have to remember that! Not had any news yet, which is probably a good thing. Anything bad will come straight to me at work.

Cigs are £5.00 here!! You have it so good! Well, not you canadians.

[christin1225]

Originally Posted by lostbutterfly

Not had any news yet, which is probably a good thing.

Try to remain positive, LB, and know that we are still praying.

[ananda]

LB! I'm sooo sorry for this time for you! I will add something to my medittion for your ex, your kids and you (hug)

staying busy is a good thing, but do be sure to leave some time for eating proper, getting rest and stuff...I handle stress better when I take care of my body.

(hug)

oh yeah...emmer..glad to read your post there are parts of the bb i don't like, but he does have some really good stuff too (hug)

[Jane63]

(((LB))) Sending prayers your way! Please keep us posted how your ex is doing!!

I quit smoking for a month using the Chantix and it worked very well for me but my willpower isn't what it used to be and I relapsed horribly! I hope to give it a try again here soon and will probably try the Chantix again or maybe the patch. I've heard there is a program where you can get the first month free (or something like that!) here in Ohio so might look into that!
((HUGS))
Jane

[lostbutterfly]

I get really wound up about the cigarettes thing. You can go into a shop and buy 20 packs of cancer sticks and 20 bottles of booze, but can you go into a pharmacy and get 20 packs of codeine - I think not!!!

The social cost of my little pill habit was a darn sight less than my booze habit. Must say, I did go different places for my booze, but that was just out of embarassment!!

Had a vision of my ex's funeral with all his ex-wives and children present!! Lucky we all get along! One big extended family. He is quite charming, generally gets away with most things, and has always looked after his ex's and is a very good dad!

Not to be confused with my ex-boyfriend, father of my youngest, who does nothing!

[Vintersemestre]

I was apalled in london when I paid about two pounds fifty for a pack of 10 smokes... glad I had brought my own.

[lostbutterfly]

In night clubs and bars, the cig machines charge 6/7 pounds for a pack, and they take 4 or 6 cigs out, so you don't even get 20. But of course in those situations, you HAVE to smoke if you've run out, which I always did.

Actually, the best way to smoke is roll ups. They taste better too!!

[lostbutterfly]

Thank you everyone, for all your prayers and good wishes.

Update on my ex-hubby. Touch and go last night, I get the impression they nearly lost him - but I get this info via his oldest daughter who gets it from his second oldest daughter who is with him now in Beijing.

He has 1/4 of one lung left functioning. His kidneys and heart are improving again. They let him come out of sedation so that he could see his daughter was there, but then of course he panicked trying to get the ventilator tube out of his throat, so they put him back under.

So that's it. Nothing more to do except keep the kids positive. My son and I watch comedies on telly, my daughter is not doing so good - she's isolating herself when she is at home. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. And the rest is in God's hands.

Hey, Emmer, congrats on 2 days. I'm so glad you are back. LB xxx

[lugnut]

I will be praying for your ex LB!! I know it is hard on the kids and you. Even though he is your ex there was a reason you married him! I hope he pulls through. The kids need him!!

Again prayers for you and your family!

[emmer]

Sorry about your x- husband (((LB))) that sux!

Hope he recovers soon.

I've hardly had any sleep in 3 days and I am exhausted. ....I 've been working long hrs too.

Tired but clean

[colagirl]

LB... I'm so sorry! Please keep us posted... I hope everything turns out okay.

[lostbutterfly]

Originally Posted by emmer

I wanted to share something I keep reading and reading, it's from the AA big book, and I find it comforting and profounding .................it causes my spirit to be at peace. ..........Please read

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.

I came across this on the gratitude forum and will keep it close to my heart.

Have you ever read books written by the Dalai Llama, Joe? He is big on the whole acceptance thing. "The Art of Happiness" is one that springs to mind. Now I'm not drunk every night, I'm going to read them all again.

For me, he is the spiritual leader of our time.

[lostbutterfly]

And here is song on the radio at the moment which has advice that might be worth listening to, certainly for me!!!!

You're not as messed up as you think you are
Your self-absorption makes you messier
Just settle down and you will feel a whole lot better
Deep down you're just like everybody else

She's not as pretty as she thinks she is
Just picture her after she's had kids
I bet she sits at home and listens to The Smiths
Deep down she's just like everybody else

So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside

He's not as clever as he likes to think
He's just ambitious with his arguing
He's crap at dancing, yeah and he can't hold his drink
Deep down he's just like everybody else

I'm not as awesome as this song makes out
I'm angry, underweight and sketching out
I'm building bonfires on my vanities and doubts
To get warm just like everybody else

So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside

Amy thinks that life is lacking in drama
So she fell for horoscopes, faith-healing and karma
She's so wrapped up in her invisible armour
She'll never grow into herself
And it's OK thinking me and all my friends are just wasters
But saying that I can still see through her heirs and graces
I bet she's scared her life won't leave any traces
Caught up like everyone else

That's not the point anyway
Oh darling, I felt compelled to call you up to say...
So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside

[Impurrfect]

((LB)) - still sending prayers for the ex, you and the kids. It's perfectly normal for people to fight a ventilator, which is why they keep people sedated when they're on them.

((Joe)) - good to see you!! I like the song, but obviously it's another Amy that thinks life is lacking in drama...THIS Amy LIKES no drama!

I've managed to catch a cold, and I HATE colds. Actually, I hate being sick, period. Guess I need to be a little more grateful when I'm feeling good, huh?

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

[christin1225]

Still praying LB. How are you and the kids doing today?

[lostbutterfly]

Me too nowadays - the less drama the better. I welcome boredom with open arms. Hi Christin - how are things?

Update on ex-hubby: He is off the ventilator now, and breathing on his own. He is p*ssed off and trying to escape from his ICU bed. The kids are really pleased and so much happier. Thanks for all the positive thoughts you all put out there.

Strange, you don't realise how much someone means to you till stuff like this happens. I don't see him a whole lot, he travels constantly to the Middle East and China, and he lives in London - quite far from us. But in spite of that, he makes me feel less alone somehow.

And colds - I hate them too, Amy. I am hoping I have caught every winter virus that is around this year. I really have had enough. I can't tell you how grateful I am NOT to be coughing, NOT to be sneezing and NOT to be blowing my darn nose!

[Vintersemestre]

I've been abnormally sick this winter too, I caught bad gastroenteritis that nearly put me in the hospital for dehydration and I just got over like my third cold.

[emmer]

I am glad your x is feeling better ((LB)).

((Amy)) that sucks that you have a cold!

When I took too many pills, I'd feel sick, but oddly, I preferd feeling sick to being clean, it kept my head away from reality.

I'm on my 4th day clean and not doing too bad

No booze for 1 month, no abusing anti/psy or other meds for about 2 weeks and no codeine for 4 days.

[Impurrfect]

((LB)) - wow, I'm glad he's off the ventilator!! I hope they get him out of ICU soon. That's not such a good place to be when you start feeling better..most of them are designed for unconscious patients who don't need much stimulation. The ones I worked in, once the patients started walking/talking, we were READY to move them out!

I still have my cold. Fell asleep, yesterday, holding onto my box of kleenex.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy