Patchez

I just returned from my monthly visit to the Doctor/Pharmacy and I need help.
In addition to my Duragesic patches (2 100mcg x 48hrs) I also go thru 100 8mg hydromorphones for breakthru pain, 90 Soma, 60 Xanax 1mg and I have a box of Actiq berry flavored lollipops for emergency use.

All of this is not quite lasting a month and it's getting harder and harder to keep from getting sick. I abuse my meds and I know that I am addicted. With the amount of meds I go thru I just don't think I can go cold turkey at home and be over it in a couple of weeks. I have been on the majority of these meds for several years and I know that with benzos cold turkey is not smart.

I want to stop. I want to be where a lot of you folks are - SOBER! I want to go to a meeting but with the amount of meds I am on I would feel like a total hypocrite. It just seems so hopeless sometimes. I have hinted around to my Doctors and they just add a new med or increase one I am already taking...
I want to tell them about my abuse but something stops me each time...

HELP! Where do I go from here?

Patchez

Impurrfect

Welcome to SR!

With the amount of meds you are on, and the length of time you've been on them, I think you really need a medical detox. Trying to stop any of them without medical advice would be pretty dangerous.

It sounds like you have legit pain issues. My stepsister does, also, and has been working with an addictionologist to keep her pain under control but not allow her to abuse her meds.

As far as meetings go, I've always been told that someone is welcome as long as they have the "desire to quit" and it sounds like you do.

This is a great place for ES&H..experience, strength, and hope. If you ARE dealing with chronic pain, there is another forum here dealing more specificially with that. However, you are welcome on any forum and will find some pretty awesome people here.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

tanyapmc

I agree that you need a medical detox. Benzo withdrawal can kill you. I think it's time to tell your doctor that your addicted and look for a new doctor. If you have legitimate pain issues then that needs to be addressed.

Please keep posting. And welcome to SR

scotts

I feel for you and I am too a chronic pain patient. I am fortunate enough to not require that heavy of narcotic pain medication.

You NEED the help of a DR to wean you off of these drugs if your pain will allow it.

If you dont mind me asking, what is your medical condition?

Fent patches, fent pops,dilaudid= a lot of pain meds. If you decide to quit on your own, take it slow.

I have recently quit my addiction and am fighting hard to keep cravings away, its tough I'll tell ya. Keep posting and we'll stay here to support you all the way!

tommyk

Tradition #3: the only requirement for membership is the DESIRE to stop....

You can, and should, go to meetings.

Then, if you want a huge leap forward, check out the 12 step program.

ccgirl2

You know what? If you tell your doctor, you'll feel such a sense of relief; you'll have someone (hopefully) in your corner. It's a good place to start.

butterflylover

Welcome Patchez! I just told my doc yesterday about my Lortab addiction that I've had for about 5 years and I'm going to get on Suboxone. I also suffer chronic pain. But, it feels like a weight has been lifted since i told my doc. And, yes, I think a medical detox is what you need. It's a safe controlled place. I wish you the best!! :ghug