Did anyone here who is/was an addict get kicked out when you weren't stable/safe?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,906
Did anyone here who is/was an addict get kicked out when you weren't stable/safe?
My H is very obviously high. Always before you could barely detect it. He's upped the usage apparantly (percocet I think?) because he's not safe to be driving and I'm terrified to get fired. I'm gathering from people on SR that he should be kicked out NOW. My counselor and I talked today and he feels I should wait a week or so until AH's next appt because he wants to lay it all out for AH.
He's afraid that AH may kill someone or himself while driving. He's also afraid that without someone to monitor him somewhat that he will lose an awesome job that he's had for 21 years. I know this is totally codependent, but what do I do about the fact that he could harm someone or himself? Also what if suicide has been mentioned? I do know that he is that low that it could happen. He could be bluffing, but I don't know how to take that chance. Thank you so much for all of your input.
He's afraid that AH may kill someone or himself while driving. He's also afraid that without someone to monitor him somewhat that he will lose an awesome job that he's had for 21 years. I know this is totally codependent, but what do I do about the fact that he could harm someone or himself? Also what if suicide has been mentioned? I do know that he is that low that it could happen. He could be bluffing, but I don't know how to take that chance. Thank you so much for all of your input.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,906
He has talked about it, but then says he's not serious, he'd never do that to the kids or I. (Unless it looks like it's unintentional - THAT is what I'm worried about). Even without the suicide talk, what about if he's driving when it's not safe. I can call the police, but then he loses his job which will completely devastate the kids and I monitarily.
I guess I"m asking because I've heard let him fall, let him fall etc. I understand this now, but I want to fall and hit rock bottom to get help, not fall and kill himself either accidentally or intentionally. KWIM?
I guess I"m asking because I've heard let him fall, let him fall etc. I understand this now, but I want to fall and hit rock bottom to get help, not fall and kill himself either accidentally or intentionally. KWIM?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Right above Texas
Posts: 8
Not sure if this is relevant but I took 3 weeks of vacation and got clean. I didn't want to get fired and didn't want to quit (couldn't quit for financial reasons) and I used an excuse of a sick family member. Told them I didn't want to go on short-term disability or Family Medical Leave b/c I needed to get a paycheck while working to get clean. I went to doctor that deals with the brain medically, and who is a takes private patients. I was on Lortab. He helped me get clean with Suboxone. Worked great for me but from what I read, it doesn't work for everyone. The key is get them in somewhere without them thinking it will disrupt their life otherwise. And make sure there is counseling to go with it - that is critical or an addict will use again.
Dopeless Hope Fiend
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: anchorage Alaska
Posts: 2,741
My addiction caused me to harm many...
I got kicked out , locked up and left a neat little trail of destruction in the path I was on with my using and abusing..
Save yourself at all cost. You cannot trust anything a using addict says or does and I can tell that you are accepting that...
Right on that you are looking to protect yourself...that really is the ONLY person we CAN save....ourselves...
Wishin the best for you and your recovery!!!
love north
I got kicked out , locked up and left a neat little trail of destruction in the path I was on with my using and abusing..
Save yourself at all cost. You cannot trust anything a using addict says or does and I can tell that you are accepting that...
Right on that you are looking to protect yourself...that really is the ONLY person we CAN save....ourselves...
Wishin the best for you and your recovery!!!
love north
Waiting For Engines
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: brooklyn, new york
Posts: 572
The mere fact that he is using narcotics and driving, is posing a danger to your children, not to mention the population.
If you were truly concerned about your family's life and your AH's "terrific job" which will evaporate if he kills someone or himself, you must present yourself at family court and try to obtain a Mental Hygeine Warrant, which will permit you to contact the police anytime he is in a car and uinder the influence. The police will immediately take hum to a psychiatric emergency room--not jail--and he will be safe, not to mention all who are on the street.
He will be evaluated and with the hope of true professional assessment, be transferred to a rehab/detox center where he can begin the road toward recovery.
Several of us have mentioned this as an intervention, and you can do it. Callie, if you just understand a little of his disease, you may save him from an ugly end...
If you were truly concerned about your family's life and your AH's "terrific job" which will evaporate if he kills someone or himself, you must present yourself at family court and try to obtain a Mental Hygeine Warrant, which will permit you to contact the police anytime he is in a car and uinder the influence. The police will immediately take hum to a psychiatric emergency room--not jail--and he will be safe, not to mention all who are on the street.
He will be evaluated and with the hope of true professional assessment, be transferred to a rehab/detox center where he can begin the road toward recovery.
Several of us have mentioned this as an intervention, and you can do it. Callie, if you just understand a little of his disease, you may save him from an ugly end...
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Callie)))
Some good advice above.
I hate to say this, but at the rate he's going, he is not only going to lose his job, but may also face criminal charges because of his profession. If there is even a small amount of meds not accounted for, he can face the same charges I got..."obtaining controlled substance by fraudulent means".
If I were you, I would prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Yes, losing his job will affect you and the kids. However, there is nothing you can do about his using. I would start working on the finances and see what you can do if/when his income is no longer coming in.
It's not fair to you or the kids, but, unfortunately, the families are usually greatly affected by someone's addiction.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Some good advice above.
I hate to say this, but at the rate he's going, he is not only going to lose his job, but may also face criminal charges because of his profession. If there is even a small amount of meds not accounted for, he can face the same charges I got..."obtaining controlled substance by fraudulent means".
If I were you, I would prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Yes, losing his job will affect you and the kids. However, there is nothing you can do about his using. I would start working on the finances and see what you can do if/when his income is no longer coming in.
It's not fair to you or the kids, but, unfortunately, the families are usually greatly affected by someone's addiction.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
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