17 years old, looking for advice - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

BloodRedSky · 05-14-2008, 04:29 AM

Hey guys, I've been reading here for a while and I appreciate the huge amount of knowledge and experience I found here.

Here's my situation: I'm 17, started doing drugs when I was 14. I did coke for two years, until I got arrested and my parents sent me to rehab. I stayed clean for a while after that, then started doing coke again and also heroin, got arrested two more times, spent two weeks in juvie, been to rehab again, then started using again.
I quit for a while because I decided to join the military, only to find out that I can't do that, because I have heart problems because of all the coke.

Right now I'm doing heroin, on a daily basis. I don't want my parents to know because they think I'm over that ****. My problem is that I don't know how to quit, I can't even imagine my life without doing drugs. I know that I need to get something done because right now, I've reached a point where it's either quitting or getting into some really nasty stuff to get more dope. I have no one to turn to, and I don't know what to do about all this.

barb dwyer · 05-14-2008, 04:42 AM

hi BRS -

Welcome to SR!
I hope you'll read the stickies at the top of this forum and I hope it will lead you to something that can help you right away.

I'm an alcoholic, but I wanted to post on your thread to let you know you're very welcome here, and that others will be along who are more familiar with narcotics addiction than I am.

BloodRedSky · 05-14-2008, 04:44 AM

Thanks for the welcome, Barb Dwyer (awesome name btw).

kj0975 · 05-14-2008, 04:52 AM

There are a few members here who have kicked heroin. Not easy but doable. Can u wean yourself down? Do you have a counselor you can talk to? Even your family Dr might be able to help you WITHOUT your parents finding out. Tryin2recover has a thread going about his struggles with heroin might want to check that out. You will go through withdrawls the worst is usually over within 4-6 days and it does get easier.

Jimmy123 · 05-14-2008, 09:04 AM

If one moment in your life can make your parents more proud than the day you left rehab it's the moment you come to them and say I need help - again. Hopefully your parents will understand you have a disease and just like cancer can come back so can drugs

Sugah · 05-14-2008, 09:24 AM

Your parents are aware of your past, so getting yourself to an NA meeting is not going to tip them off to a new problem - if they received any sort of education when you were in rehab. Being honest with them and asking them for help is ideal, though if the thought of coming clean is keeping you from getting clean, do what you need to do and deal with them later.

Please find a meeting. Find a network. Let others help you and teach you how they did it.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

ksos · 05-14-2008, 01:00 PM

Welcome to SR, although it pains me to say that to a 17 year old Heroin user. My friend, you need a full physical assessment by qualified medical personnel before anyone, let alone non-medical people on a message board, can advise you on how to stop using.

Had I not heard of heart problems, I may have suggested locking yourself in a room for a week and suffer, the way so many of us did--although it was a bit late for most of us. The discomfort of withdrawal, I have found, is far more profound in kids your age, than in kids my age (44).

You have a pre-existing condition which would tell me to advise you to ask an MD. There are medications that can be used which will assist you in the withdrawal phase of this process, but as Sugah said, find a meeting, meaning an NA meeting to help you with the hardest part of your dope addiction--the mental piece.

You sound like a smart kid. Too bad, it usually hits the smarter ones first. Oh, and by the way, please don't think that you are helping your heart by doing dope instead of coke, though. Toss that myth away right now, for you are probably 10 times more likely to go into cardiac arrest than the healthy fellow.

My prayers are there for you, son. Be well, and post whenever you need to.

barb dwyer · 05-14-2008, 11:11 PM

*prayers for BRS*

I've been thinking aboutyou all day, hon - hope you're okay?

BloodRedSky · 05-15-2008, 01:10 AM

Hey guys, thanks for the replies... I can't really talk to my parents about this-- we're not on the best of terms, and I can't rely on them for anything. About going to the doc-- aren't they obligated to call my parents?
If I could, I'd just check myself into a hospital, but being a minor complicates things.
I wish I could just wake up tomorrow morning without all this mess.

Again, thanks for the replies and support.

Jimmy123 · 05-15-2008, 01:29 AM

best of terms? terms? A parent can be mad at you and still love you. Don't be fooled by T.V. it's not uncommon for 17 year old's to have a rocky relationship with his parents. Anyway what could they possibly do to you sure their might be some yelling and screaming once again something very common amognst teens and their folks. and your on Heroin of course your on bad terms.... but believe me your parents just want their son back not a heroin addict who they cant trust

Here is your personal ultimatum you must make a decision NOW! Do I 1. want to do some nasty **** every day to some trucker in a bus stop just to buy enough heroin so you won't get sick or 2. have a fight with your parents BUT ultimately end up in rehab.

May God Bless you with long life health and most importantly happiness

mtnmagic · 05-15-2008, 01:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BloodRedSky

Hey guys, thanks for the replies... I can't really talk to my parents about this-- we're not on the best of terms, and I can't rely on them for anything. About going to the doc-- aren't they obligated to call my parents?
If I could, I'd just check myself into a hospital, but being a minor complicates things.
I wish I could just wake up tomorrow morning without all this mess.

Again, thanks for the replies and support.

BRS - I don't know about the legal situation of contacting your parents in your state. I do know you should go to the hospital and tell them you have no contact with your parents at this time and need help. Please do it.
Just do it and let things work themselves as the situation arises. Even if your parents do need to be contacted, I will tell you as a parent of an addicted son who I love more then life itself, the fact that he was trying to get some help would cross out any anger I would feel at what ever terms were going on in our lifes. I have gone through this over and over with my oldest son. His addiction is to pain meds (Oxy). Years have gone by. We have been very angry with each other. This started when he was a teenager. I love him. He has lied and took my money for his drugs. If he would just ask for help then go do rehab I would go to the ends of the world to make that available to him.

On the other hand,my own addiction to alcohol and mental illness, has made it afraid for him to approach me. I do understand that. It is gets so complicated.

By posting here, I believe you are at a turning point. Looking for a place to go or trust. Start with your Doc and the ER. Be honest. Do not protect your parents. That was so much of the problem that kept and still keeps my older son from getting the help he needs. They do not need protection. As a mom I willl share with you...I love my two sons with all my life. My own problems have affected them very much. I would very much want them to acknowledge that for their own help and recovery.

BloodRedSky · 05-15-2008, 08:18 AM

Update:
My parents found some of my stash. We talked it out. I'm leaving for the hospital in about 30 minutes, and after I get thru withdrawal, they're shipping me off to an out-of-state, long term rehab program. They say I'll be there for over a year. I just don't give a **** anymore, I just wish I could sleep and never wake up.

kj0975 · 05-15-2008, 08:38 AM

Your upset right now but look at this as a blessing!!! What a gift your parents are giving you right now. You have the rest of your life ahead of you, beat this addiction, work on it, get your life back. It can be done. I wish you the best of luck.

fallen17star · 05-15-2008, 08:45 AM

Do you want to get clean? If you do, you have to be prepaired for the road ahead. It's going to be long, emotional, and very rough but you have to overcome it. Heads up your parents are never going to understand what your going through but you just have to tell them how you feel. They only want to help you. I agree with Ksos though... you need a physical assesment. Herion is a strong drug that will really screw with your head! I wish you the best of luck and if you ever need someone to talk to there are more then enoough people here for you.

navysteve · 05-16-2008, 04:58 AM

Where in PA are you?????

Jimmy123 · 05-25-2008, 07:22 AM

Losing a year in rehab is better than losing a life to smak

serenityqueen · 05-25-2008, 08:49 AM

UPDATE:

I heard from BRS a few times over the past several days. He was in a tx program but ran away because he said they weren't giving him anything for his withdrawls. He contacted me via PM while he was on the streets and was having a hard time. He ran into some legal problems that, in my opinion, saved his life. This got him arrested but off the streets. He spent a few days in a hospital and is now at home with his parents waiting for another treatment center to call when they have a bed ready for him.

I have an email address for him but I'm going to respect his privacy and request not to give it out. However, I am going to encourage him to come back on SR until he leaves for treatment. I hope at that time everyone will share their experience, strength and hope with him instead of scolding him. None of us would be on this board right now if we hadn't made some huge mistakes with drugs and alcohol. Think about how scared and lost YOU were/are, imagine being 17 years old.

God Bless,
Judy

BloodRedSky · 05-25-2008, 02:30 PM

Thanks, serenityqueen-- nothing much I can add to the update, I'm just sitting around waiting for the call and trying hard to stay clean. I can't wait to go. I really had enough of this **** running my life.

Sugah · 05-25-2008, 05:36 PM

BRS, sit tight. Sit on your hands if you have to. Withdrawals are very uncomfortable, but if you don't use, there is an end to them. Using only prolongs the process. When I went to detox, I spent a lot of time chanting like the Little Engine Who Could - I know I can, I know I can... You can, too. And, then - freedom!

If you'd like to pm me, I'm in PA as well. If we're close, or even if we're not, perhaps I can help you get in contact with someone locally to help you through this. No matter where you are, there are recovering people all around you. I wish someone had been there for me to show me the way when I was your age. Instead, I had to take it almost all the way to the bitter end. It is a gift that you have reached a point of desperation so early. Please don't turn that gift away!

Peace & Love,
Sugah

barb dwyer · 05-27-2008, 11:32 AM

BRS -

well, gotta hand one thing to ya - you sure seem to stay busy!

I've thought about you often over the past week
or however long it's been since your first post.
I keep thinking . seventeen - and doing heroin already?!?!?!?!?
I dunno.
Must be the granma in me.
Drugs were far more 'recreational' in 'my day'.
We played around with 'em, then put 'em down and went to college.
It's such a different world now.
I don't wanna talk about it.
I never intended to get this old.

What a teacher you'll turn out to be when you DO this.

Remember - you'll never have to go through this again.

We're HERE... you're not alone.
I *don't* know what the withdrawals are like for heroin.
But I *do* know what alcohol withdrawals are.
And I intend to be here for ya if you need company.

I'm so glad that Spirit is looking out for you as well.
There's no such thing as 'coincidence' in barb's world.

Every now and then,
a Soul in True Pain comes on this site.
Spirit ... points these out from time to time.
You are one of them.
Stick it out - we're here -
if for nothing but to yell at us that we don't understand.

There is so much in this world that is beautiful ...
so much livingness in front of you.
All I can keep thinking about you is -
what a teacher you will be.

This is your 'true education' time.
Use it.
We're here to help in whatever way we can.

ksos · 05-27-2008, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BloodRedSky

Thanks, serenityqueen-- nothing much I can add to the update, I'm just sitting around waiting for the call and trying hard to stay clean. I can't wait to go. I really had enough of this **** running my life.

Kid...

You are doing the best thing for yourself now, okay? This crap happened for a reason, meanng your folks finding out, and even bouncing from a rehab that wasn't helping you feel semi-comfortable with the withdrawals...

It is gonna hurt, anyway...but you will not die from withdrawal--at least, my experience and the other addicts I know, never died from getting off of dope.

I am proud of you and your parents will ultimately, in time, share the same pride in that you did something which other young people do not often do.

Hang in, brother...

Ksos

soulsearcher67 · 05-27-2008, 06:32 PM

Hey Blood!

"I really had enough of this **** running my life."

By the grace of God, there go I....but you, Blood, don't have to go as far as I did!

I started drinking at 12, "softer drugs" at 13, snorting cocaine by 18, and by 22 had a daily crack cocaine habit (called freebase when I started) that lasted for over 17 years. Yeah, the sh*t ruins your life!

Wow! Only 17, and you can see that already! I wasn't even able to admit I had a problem until I was around 37 years old. I'm a year and half clean and sober soon. I don't obsess, crave, have urges, and very seldom even think about drinking and drugging anymore. You can have this if you really want it, and are willing to do the work!

What worked for me is 12 Steps, a sponsor, meetings(a lot of them!), fellowship, and above all a belief and trust in a "higher power."

In spirit we are brothers...you are never alone...

I'll be watching this thread....

ARIES · 05-28-2008, 12:30 PM

I hope you're doin' well right now BRS...

I WISH YOU A LOT OF STRENGTH !!!!

Love from Stefanie

BloodRedSky · 06-01-2008, 01:59 PM

Hey guys. Thanks for the replies, and your kindness. That's not something I'm used to getting from people. I spent the past few days at my grandma's place, I had to get away for a while. It just got too much. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow morning. It's like stepping off of life into some huge unknown. Don't know what to think about that.

Hopefully, I'll be able to get back here someday and say, I did it.

05-14-2008, 04:29 AM	#1 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	17 years old, looking for advice Hey guys, I've been reading here for a while and I appreciate the huge amount of knowledge and experience I found here. Here's my situation: I'm 17, started doing drugs when I was 14. I did coke for two years, until I got arrested and my parents sent me to rehab. I stayed clean for a while after that, then started doing coke again and also heroin, got arrested two more times, spent two weeks in juvie, been to rehab again, then started using again. I quit for a while because I decided to join the military, only to find out that I can't do that, because I have heart problems because of all the coke. Right now I'm doing heroin, on a daily basis. I don't want my parents to know because they think I'm over that ****. My problem is that I don't know how to quit, I can't even imagine my life without doing drugs. I know that I need to get something done because right now, I've reached a point where it's either quitting or getting into some really nasty stuff to get more dope. I have no one to turn to, and I don't know what to do about all this.

05-14-2008, 04:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
barb dwyer same planet...different world Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: butte mt Posts: 7,143 Blog Entries: 3	hi BRS - Welcome to SR! I hope you'll read the stickies at the top of this forum and I hope it will lead you to something that can help you right away. I'm an alcoholic, but I wanted to post on your thread to let you know you're very welcome here, and that others will be along who are more familiar with narcotics addiction than I am. __________________ When I changed the way I looked at things, the things I looked at changed.

05-14-2008, 04:52 AM	#4 (permalink)
kj0975 Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: NY Posts: 2,839	There are a few members here who have kicked heroin. Not easy but doable. Can u wean yourself down? Do you have a counselor you can talk to? Even your family Dr might be able to help you WITHOUT your parents finding out. Tryin2recover has a thread going about his struggles with heroin might want to check that out. You will go through withdrawls the worst is usually over within 4-6 days and it does get easier. __________________ When you grow towards the light the shadows fall behind you- unknown

05-14-2008, 09:24 AM	#6 (permalink)
Sugah Om, Aum, Ohm... Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh Posts: 2,353	Your parents are aware of your past, so getting yourself to an NA meeting is not going to tip them off to a new problem - if they received any sort of education when you were in rehab. Being honest with them and asking them for help is ideal, though if the thought of coming clean is keeping you from getting clean, do what you need to do and deal with them later. Please find a meeting. Find a network. Let others help you and teach you how they did it. Peace & Love, Sugah __________________ There's a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done Keep me in your heart for awhile ~WZ ANS 01/29/86 - 08/04/08

05-14-2008, 01:00 PM	#7 (permalink)
ksos Waiting For Engines Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: brooklyn, new york Posts: 545	Welcome to SR, although it pains me to say that to a 17 year old Heroin user. My friend, you need a full physical assessment by qualified medical personnel before anyone, let alone non-medical people on a message board, can advise you on how to stop using. Had I not heard of heart problems, I may have suggested locking yourself in a room for a week and suffer, the way so many of us did--although it was a bit late for most of us. The discomfort of withdrawal, I have found, is far more profound in kids your age, than in kids my age (44). You have a pre-existing condition which would tell me to advise you to ask an MD. There are medications that can be used which will assist you in the withdrawal phase of this process, but as Sugah said, find a meeting, meaning an NA meeting to help you with the hardest part of your dope addiction--the mental piece. You sound like a smart kid. Too bad, it usually hits the smarter ones first. Oh, and by the way, please don't think that you are helping your heart by doing dope instead of coke, though. Toss that myth away right now, for you are probably 10 times more likely to go into cardiac arrest than the healthy fellow. My prayers are there for you, son. Be well, and post whenever you need to. __________________ Ksos "If Enough people Call You A Duck, You Better Start Quacking."

05-14-2008, 04:44 AM	#3 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	Thanks for the welcome, Barb Dwyer (awesome name btw).

05-14-2008, 09:04 AM	#5 (permalink)
Jimmy123 Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 24	If one moment in your life can make your parents more proud than the day you left rehab it's the moment you come to them and say I need help - again. Hopefully your parents will understand you have a disease and just like cancer can come back so can drugs

05-14-2008, 11:11 PM	#8 (permalink)
barb dwyer same planet...different world Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: butte mt Posts: 7,143 Blog Entries: 3	prayers for BRS I've been thinking aboutyou all day, hon - hope you're okay? __________________ When I changed the way I looked at things, the things I looked at changed.

05-15-2008, 01:10 AM	#9 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	Hey guys, thanks for the replies... I can't really talk to my parents about this-- we're not on the best of terms, and I can't rely on them for anything. About going to the doc-- aren't they obligated to call my parents? If I could, I'd just check myself into a hospital, but being a minor complicates things. I wish I could just wake up tomorrow morning without all this mess. Again, thanks for the replies and support.

05-15-2008, 01:29 AM	#10 (permalink)
Jimmy123 Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 24	best of terms? terms? A parent can be mad at you and still love you. Don't be fooled by T.V. it's not uncommon for 17 year old's to have a rocky relationship with his parents. Anyway what could they possibly do to you sure their might be some yelling and screaming once again something very common amognst teens and their folks. and your on Heroin of course your on bad terms.... but believe me your parents just want their son back not a heroin addict who they cant trust Here is your personal ultimatum you must make a decision NOW! Do I 1. want to do some nasty **** every day to some trucker in a bus stop just to buy enough heroin so you won't get sick or 2. have a fight with your parents BUT ultimately end up in rehab. May God Bless you with long life health and most importantly happiness

05-15-2008, 08:18 AM	#12 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	Update: My parents found some of my stash. We talked it out. I'm leaving for the hospital in about 30 minutes, and after I get thru withdrawal, they're shipping me off to an out-of-state, long term rehab program. They say I'll be there for over a year. I just don't give a **** anymore, I just wish I could sleep and never wake up.

05-15-2008, 08:38 AM	#13 (permalink)
kj0975 Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: NY Posts: 2,839	Your upset right now but look at this as a blessing!!! What a gift your parents are giving you right now. You have the rest of your life ahead of you, beat this addiction, work on it, get your life back. It can be done. I wish you the best of luck. __________________ When you grow towards the light the shadows fall behind you- unknown

05-15-2008, 08:45 AM	#14 (permalink)
fallen17star I'm here of my own free will.. Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Columbus, OH Posts: 23	Do you want to get clean? If you do, you have to be prepaired for the road ahead. It's going to be long, emotional, and very rough but you have to overcome it. Heads up your parents are never going to understand what your going through but you just have to tell them how you feel. They only want to help you. I agree with Ksos though... you need a physical assesment. Herion is a strong drug that will really screw with your head! I wish you the best of luck and if you ever need someone to talk to there are more then enoough people here for you.

05-16-2008, 04:58 AM	#15 (permalink)
navysteve Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: pennsylvania Posts: 798	Where in PA are you?????

05-25-2008, 07:22 AM	#16 (permalink)
Jimmy123 Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 24	Losing a year in rehab is better than losing a life to smak

05-25-2008, 08:49 AM	#17 (permalink)
serenityqueen Attitude of Gratitude Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Dayton, Ohio Posts: 1,214	UPDATE: I heard from BRS a few times over the past several days. He was in a tx program but ran away because he said they weren't giving him anything for his withdrawls. He contacted me via PM while he was on the streets and was having a hard time. He ran into some legal problems that, in my opinion, saved his life. This got him arrested but off the streets. He spent a few days in a hospital and is now at home with his parents waiting for another treatment center to call when they have a bed ready for him. I have an email address for him but I'm going to respect his privacy and request not to give it out. However, I am going to encourage him to come back on SR until he leaves for treatment. I hope at that time everyone will share their experience, strength and hope with him instead of scolding him. None of us would be on this board right now if we hadn't made some huge mistakes with drugs and alcohol. Think about how scared and lost YOU were/are, imagine being 17 years old. God Bless, Judy __________________ *"It's Great to be the Queen!"*

05-25-2008, 02:30 PM	#18 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	Thanks, serenityqueen-- nothing much I can add to the update, I'm just sitting around waiting for the call and trying hard to stay clean. I can't wait to go. I really had enough of this **** running my life.

05-25-2008, 05:36 PM	#19 (permalink)
Sugah Om, Aum, Ohm... Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh Posts: 2,353	BRS, sit tight. Sit on your hands if you have to. Withdrawals are very uncomfortable, but if you don't use, there is an end to them. Using only prolongs the process. When I went to detox, I spent a lot of time chanting like the Little Engine Who Could - I know I can, I know I can... You can, too. And, then - freedom! If you'd like to pm me, I'm in PA as well. If we're close, or even if we're not, perhaps I can help you get in contact with someone locally to help you through this. No matter where you are, there are recovering people all around you. I wish someone had been there for me to show me the way when I was your age. Instead, I had to take it almost all the way to the bitter end. It is a gift that you have reached a point of desperation so early. Please don't turn that gift away! Peace & Love, Sugah __________________ There's a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done Keep me in your heart for awhile ~WZ ANS 01/29/86 - 08/04/08

05-27-2008, 11:32 AM	#20 (permalink)
barb dwyer same planet...different world Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: butte mt Posts: 7,143 Blog Entries: 3	BRS - well, gotta hand one thing to ya - you sure seem to stay busy! I've thought about you often over the past week or however long it's been since your first post. I keep thinking . seventeen - and doing heroin already?!?!?!?!? I dunno. Must be the granma in me. Drugs were far more 'recreational' in 'my day'. We played around with 'em, then put 'em down and went to college. It's such a different world now. I don't wanna talk about it. I never intended to get this old. What a teacher you'll turn out to be when you DO this. Remember - you'll never have to go through this again. We're HERE... you're not alone. I don't know what the withdrawals are like for heroin. But I do know what alcohol withdrawals are. And I intend to be here for ya if you need company. I'm so glad that Spirit is looking out for you as well. There's no such thing as 'coincidence' in barb's world. Every now and then, a Soul in True Pain comes on this site. Spirit ... points these out from time to time. You are one of them. Stick it out - we're here - if for nothing but to yell at us that we don't understand. There is so much in this world that is beautiful ... so much livingness in front of you. All I can keep thinking about you is - what a teacher you will be. This is your 'true education' time. Use it. We're here to help in whatever way we can. __________________ When I changed the way I looked at things, the things I looked at changed.

05-27-2008, 06:32 PM	#22 (permalink)
soulsearcher67 Guest Join Date: May 2008 Location: Alberta, Canada Posts: 16 Blog Entries: 3	Hey Blood! "I really had enough of this **** running my life." By the grace of God, there go I....but you, Blood, don't have to go as far as I did! I started drinking at 12, "softer drugs" at 13, snorting cocaine by 18, and by 22 had a daily crack cocaine habit (called freebase when I started) that lasted for over 17 years. Yeah, the sh*t ruins your life! Wow! Only 17, and you can see that already! I wasn't even able to admit I had a problem until I was around 37 years old. I'm a year and half clean and sober soon. I don't obsess, crave, have urges, and very seldom even think about drinking and drugging anymore. You can have this if you really want it, and are willing to do the work! What worked for me is 12 Steps, a sponsor, meetings(a lot of them!), fellowship, and above all a belief and trust in a "higher power." In spirit we are brothers...you are never alone... I'll be watching this thread....

05-28-2008, 12:30 PM	#23 (permalink)
ARIES I choose to live Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Antwerp (Belgium) Posts: 386 Blog Entries: 13	I hope you're doin' well right now BRS... I WISH YOU A LOT OF STRENGTH !!!! Love from Stefanie __________________ There was New York Jake,the butcher boy who was always getting tight And every time that he'd get full he was spoiling for a fight But Jake rampaged against a knife in the hands of old Bob Stein And over Jake they held a wake in the days of '49 (Bob Dylan days of '49)

06-01-2008, 01:59 PM	#24 (permalink)
BloodRedSky Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: PA Posts: 8	Hey guys. Thanks for the replies, and your kindness. That's not something I'm used to getting from people. I spent the past few days at my grandma's place, I had to get away for a while. It just got too much. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow morning. It's like stepping off of life into some huge unknown. Don't know what to think about that. Hopefully, I'll be able to get back here someday and say, I did it.