more of the same

[canuhearme]

I guess it's not news to most of you but well, last night I did it again, my veins didn't hold out. Good thing? Nope.. I got a little high and thought thats it. I blew $100 in 4 hours and got nothing from it really. Last night I thought I'm not doing this anymore. But today, I'm more determined than ever. I don't seem to care. Maybe next will kill me and I'll never have to deal with the fact that hubby is using again and he's very stubborn when it comes to cleaning up.
I figure we have just ended our marriage, how will we ever both clean up at the same time? Just feel like nothing really matters right now.

Are you guys going to tell me to get lost till I'm ready?

[justanothrdrunk]

No.

[Latte]

I love it here. No one has ever told me to get lost.

No one in AA/NA has ever told me to get lost.

Keep coming back, okay.

[canuhearme]

I didn't want to come here today but something just keeps telling me to stay connected to sr. I just know I don't want to hear what you all have to say.

[anvilhead]

nope, stay here and GET READY! you are right, it's gonna be way tough to get clean with a using addict underfoot. and right now you two are like gasoline and lit matches....i think you DO wanna quit this deadly pursuit, or you wouldn't be here.....but you are also in the grips of a really REALLY powerful drug and it's not gonna let go easily...so i'm not surprised you went from NO MORE, to WHO GIVES A RIP? in a short period of time.....it's the crash and burn part....

you're an addict who doesn't want to use anymore, but finding that's a bit tougher than just saying D U N! that's ok, that's why you got US! you are worth it.......

[Someone]

oh girl. i am so sorry. you can't give up though. if you have to walk away from your hubby then maybe you do for a while. it dosen't have to be over, you just got to do whats best for you right now.

i have been doing okay. i haven't had any urges really. but its step by step, right?? please PM me if you need to! i am here for you!

[canuhearme]

The only thing I know for sure right now is that I'm not going to do this forever. I'll be outa pocket for a while, my mother is having a heart cath today so I'm going to go stay with her a few days. It'll be really good for me to get out of here for a while. I'm worried about her, but I'm sure glad to get away.

[Impurrfect]

sending prayers for you and your mom. Check back in when you can.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

[Freedom1990]

I was told time and time again, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

When I was taken to rehab, I weighed 109 pounds (I'm 6' tall), had blown out all the veins in my arms, was pregnant, and too weak to even hold my head up for long.

After rehab I had to walk away from the then using hubby who was also psychotic and violent.

He never found recovery, and was buried last year at the age of 47. He died from complications of AIDS.

Death is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

[chiynita]

Originally Posted by Freedom1990

I was told time and time again, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

When I was taken to rehab, I weighed 109 pounds (I'm 6' tall), had blown out all the veins in my arms, was pregnant, and too weak to even hold my head up for long.

After rehab I had to walk away from the then using hubby who was also psychotic and violent.

He never found recovery, and was buried last year at the age of 47. He died from complications of AIDS.

Death is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Doeast get anymore clear cut than that.

I am thinking of you and praying for you and your mom.
It can get better. I was told settle for nothing now..Settle for nothing later.
Hugs