Lortab Withdrawal

[butterflylover]

Hey, everyone, don't know if ya remember me or not but Hi! I've tried to quit before and that was only because I ran out of them. This time it's conscious decision. I've been on about 5-6 10mgs of Lortab a day since late 2003ish. Today is day 2 of cold turkey. I pretty much knew what to expect symptom wise, but the depression, no energy/motivation, and cravings are driving me absolutely f'n nuts! I feel like I lost my best friend. I do get 7.5's for rx'd for chronic back pain and pain from a possible ovarian cyst. But also have access to the 10's. The worst part of it all is 2 family members that I live with are prescribed Lortabs! I can't move out. That is NOT an option. And it's the other people's house. I'm in the middle of getting on disabilty for Bipolar/OCD...you name it. Hubby is also in the midst of a disabilty claim because he is Bipolar too...with some built up rage.

Anyhoo, When ya'll were on Lortabs or other opiates like it, did it make you gain weight and a belly? I don't eat much when I full of Lortabs.

Please share your 2 cents because I need to read 'em. I'm NOT seeing the light at the end of the table. Not even a glimmer. I need someonr to tell me that it will get better. I've been depressed since I was a child and now going through these w/d is making me depressed times 10.

Thanks for reading my story. Any advice and reassurance that it does get better much appreciated. :praying

[Aysha]

I dont know anything about lortabs or any pilss.
I just wanted to say I am glad you are making a conscious decision to quit.
With anything, it takes time.
So keep trying and good luck.

[tanyapmc]

Hi Butterfly. I have come off of opiates many times. And it does suck. I think it's great that you are coming off of them by choice. Keep hydrated. Gatorade is a good drink for hydration. Take some imodium for the runs.
Have you ever gone to NA? That would probably help you out too.
Try to hang in there. It will get better. If you do use you will have to do the 2 days over again.

[serenityqueen]

Congratulations Butterfly for making the decision to LIVE!!!!

You asked for someone to tell you that it does get better and you can do it?


Here I am!

I used for 32 years, most of that time I was having a love affair with opiates. I first put myself into tx in 1980. I just hadn't truly hit my bottom and also, I don't think I truly wanted to quit, I just wanted to learn how to control my usage. Hah! I had been in and out of tx, AA/NA, you name it since then. On July 25, 2005, I was so dope sick I couldn't imagine making it through the day, much less the hour. I never dreamed someone could feel so horrible and still be alive. I had built such a tollerance that I don't see how I didn't OD. I was using an average of 80 - 90 Vicodin ES a day! It took the initial wake up dose of 20 just to be able to get up, shower and get ready to go look for more. I was soooooo sick. I I have been Clean, Sober and in Recovery since. I have a little over 2 1/2 years in my new life! It was hard, I'm not going to lie to you. But if you truly want to be Clean, Free and Happy, you can do it! I suggest lots of meetings, get a Sponsor, Use that Sponsor, get lots of phone numbers and use them. I see that you have a relationship with God already, He will be your strongest supporter ever! Be open, honest and willing. If I were told that if I stood on my head, naked, whistled a show tune in the middle of Main St. during rush hour traffic, I would be able to stay clean just one more day, I would have asked what tune shall I whistle and on what street? You have to want this. Anythings possible. If you'd like to send me a personal message, I'd be happy to exchange some one on one info on what else really helped me.

A final thought. My Sponsor told me when I first wake up each morning to ask God, "please" And if I made it through that day, say "thank you" If you have to begin with an hour at a time, then so be it. Just remember, anythings possible if only you believe!

[butterflylover]

Well, I was woken out of a dead sleep with tummy troubles. Haven't had them yet this time around. Otherwise, I feel okay. Now, I can't go back to sleep!

Thanks for the replies everyone! VERY much appreciated. I'll type more later today.

[ccgirl2]

all of what you are going through is very normal. As far as the depression, remember, opiates worsen depression. The depression you feel now is your brain trying to heal and saying wtf happened to me? When you've had a good number of days or weeks behind you, talk to your doctor about your depression. Opiates are not antidepressants. They are the anti antidepressants.

[TiredMama]

I totally agree with CC. Your body is looking for that absent drug and is doing what it can to find it. It is draining you inside and out searching. It is a horrible feeling that I have experienced way too many times. Can I ask you is this your first detox? Have you considered NA or any other treatments?

[butterflylover]

Well, today is day 4. Last night I just felt wired up. Weird, weird feeling. Ahh! I want this to be over with...The cravings are killing me as well as my back pain =(

[serenityqueen]

Well, you've made it to day 4! the physical withdrawl symptoms should be easing up a little. I know if I could be still long enough, a long, hot bubble bath always seems to help any situation with me. I'd put some good music, relaxing music, on the stereo, light a few scented candles, take my smokes and a big ol' cup of Diet Pepsi in the bathroom. I'd let anyone else in my house know that if they anticipate needing to use the bathroom within the next 45 minutes now, they better go before I get it or forever hold their pee. Lol! The hot water should sooth your back too.

Also, do you journal? I found that to be a great outlet for me. My first few months in Recovery, my journaling went pretty much from one extreme to another. Either I was floating on a pink cloud, or else I was mad, mad, mad! I know now I was going through a grieving process. I was missing my pills terribly. It's always easier to express anger rather than hurt. At least for me. I also wrote a goodbye letter to my doc. And it wasn't a pretty letter. I got out all of the things I had lost due to my addiction, and not just the monetary things that can be replaced. You know what I mean. Hang in there, it should be easing up very soon. Keep posting, get to a meeting, get a Sponsor and remember, this too shall pass.

I'm leaving for a meeting myself now. I'll check with ya later.

[bvaljalo]

Day 4, CONGRATS ... you're doing awesome. Based on the amount you were using and what it was, I can tell you for SURE that sometime in the very near future, the fog will lift and the sun will shine through the clouds. It won't be long now, I PROMISE. If I were you, I'd be going to like 3 AA/NA meetings a day, starting today. And, given your obvious religious proclivities, I'd probably be praying a lot.

I can tell you that another thing that's for sure ... the sober life that awaits you is going to be better beyond your wildest dreams compared to the life you've been living addicted to opiates. I know from whence I speak. I fall into the level of usage category that SerenityQueen describes (not for that long, but I could easily put away the same amounts she describes nonetheless), and I got sober and have managed to put nearly 9 months behind me since I last used anything to get loaded on. It can be done. If I can do it, so can you.

You're almost there baby, just tough it out another couple days (MAX) and you'll be done with the 90% of the worst part ... and the last 10%, what I call a sort of 'clinging malaise' is way more manageable, because your spirits in general will be infinitely better than how you feel now.

Believe me, you DON'T want to blow it now by using, whatEVER you gotta do to stay off the s*it, you better do it. Get to some NA meetings pronto is my best advice...

[bvaljalo]

By the way, the wired up feeling is adrenaline. Your body has been overproducing it in order to keep you awake in spite of the heavy doses of depressant drugs you've been putting into your system. That's why people in w/d's can not sleep (or a big part of it at least) and their legs shake and they feel all panicky (and many of them jabber constantly). It takes a WHILE for your adrenaline system to get back to normal, but fortunately it WILL. Soon the jitters and trouble sleeping will be the last vestiges of your fading addiction, and you'll be so happy that that's the worst of it ...

[TiredMama]

You sound like you are doing great!! If you are having a hard time with your legs at night, take a hot shower and actually sit in the shower with the hot water running on your legs. My withdrawal symptoms are severe restless legs and 98% of the time, this works for me. Then immediately lay down after the shower so you might can have a chance of falling asleep before they start "crawling" again.

[serenityqueen]

Are you still with us Butterfly?

[butterflylover]

Thanks everyone for the kind words. Unfortunately, I slipped up and took 3 10's today. I'm so mad at myself. I feel like I've let everyone down. I've NEVER been good with willpower but I've been praying for the strength to get through this. So, I'll drag my sorry butt back out of this and try again.

My doc did rx me some Mobic (painkiller for Arthritis and back pain), Flexeril, and Amitryptiline for sleep.

I feel horrible for giving in to the cravings. I'm sorry guys. Tomorrow is a new start. Do ya'll think that taking those 3 10mg tabs will start the w/d part all over agin? Surely not. And thanks bvaljalo for the info on the wired feeling. I never knew that.

I will keep on postin'. And, again, thank you all for supporting me and letting me know it will get better.

Take care,
~B~

[TiredMama]

Hey Butterfly--

Just pick up and start over again. Tomorrow is another day!! Good luck to you I hope you can get some rest tonight.

[ccgirl2]

Tired is right. Remember this too, for me day 4 was the turning point where I didn't feel like I wanted to die from discomfort. If you can make it to that point this time, aim for day five. You'll be amazed.

[woops]

OK Butterfly - nothing for it but to get back in the saddle again! Taking those 3 will most probably set you back a bit - but not enough to stop your recovery..............just prolong it a bit. But - dont take any more - or you will end up back at Day 1 again - and you dont want to have to go thro all that again?
Good luck.

[jazpoppy]

Butterfly;

Did you tell your doctor to stop prescribing you the vicodin? U mentioned Mobic, and a couple of other non-habit forming meds that your doctor prescribed, so I wondered if he/she is helping you through this as well, or if you are not telling him/her so you can go back and get the rx if you "feel" like you need it? I hope you did be honest with your doctor, they can be your best friend if you are honest with them. They will give you the best head start in the recovery process if you keep in touch with them and are open and honest with them. Ask your doctor about clonodine (its a blood pressure medication that can help opiate addicted people in w/d from developing dangerous high BP and can take away the nervousness, and help you feel calmer (its non-addictive).

Take care and good luck.

Luv

Jaz

[ccgirl2]

Jaz is right about telling your doctor. Best thing I ever did. I couldn't be dishonest if I wanted to.

[butterflylover]

Originally Posted by jazpoppy

Butterfly;

Did you tell your doctor to stop prescribing you the vicodin? U mentioned Mobic, and a couple of other non-habit forming meds that your doctor prescribed, so I wondered if he/she is helping you through this as well, or if you are not telling him/her so you can go back and get the rx if you "feel" like you need it? I hope you did be honest with your doctor, they can be your best friend if you are honest with them. They will give you the best head start in the recovery process if you keep in touch with them and are open and honest with them. Ask your doctor about clonodine (its a blood pressure medication that can help opiate addicted people in w/d from developing dangerous high BP and can take away the nervousness, and help you feel calmer (its non-addictive).

Take care and good luck.

Luv

Jaz

Thanks everyone for the advice. Jaz, one part in your post explained me to the t. "Did you tell your doctor to stop prescribing you the vicodin? U mentioned Mobic, and a couple of other non-habit forming meds that your doctor prescribed, so I wondered if he/she is helping you through this as well, or if you are not telling him/her so you can go back and get the rx if you "feel" like you need it?'. I was rx'd the Lortabs at the same time as the other meds mentioned. I just can't tell my doctor yet...I know I should.

I didn't take any Lortabs yesterday but I did today. I was soooo depressed yesterday. I cried ALL day and cried myself to sleep with a horrible migraine.There are no more pills in the house. So, I will start again tomorrow. I'm gonna take it one day at a time. I'm going to beat this. I HAVE to. I'm so sick and tired of the evil sob's. They're pure evil I tell ya.


Well, We'll see how I feel tomorrow. Another day one. Dang, this is hard

[serenityqueen]

A few days ago, you were on what, day four or so? You were happy you didn't take any pills. Why did you keep them if you were going to quit? You have to get rid of everything and tell your Dr. You have to tell on your disease. Remember, you're only as sick as the secrets you keep.

I love ya,

[ccgirl2]

The first step is to admit your powerlessness over your addiction. I truly believe that if you are ready to do that, you will be ready to flush those things.

[TiredMama]

I agree with CC. It sucks having to admit it but sometimes you have to.