Day 3 - home detox

[iluvmykids]

I am really confused right now. I have been tapering from a 10 -13 pill a day hydro habit for the last 2.5 weeks. I got down to a pretty low dosage at the end of last week and got sick of the SLOW DEATH feeling, so on sat. I flushed the rest and went CT. The last few days have been hell, but a weird thing happened last night. I slept almost the WHOLE night. No drugs (simply sleep), but no alcohol, sleep meds etc. I expected it to another horrible night of cramps, sweats, RLS, etc. I have done this before, and really want this to work this time. It has to work. I do not feel that a person has to reach rock bottom to kick this. I have done so much damage to myself and family that I want to make this right.

[T1]

your story is a lot like mine. Took me 3 times over 3 years from a similar daily amount. I did a rapid taper because I knew I didn't have a refill coming. Sucked it up and now I'm clean for almost 3 weeks now. You know how horrible w/d's can be so hang in there. I needed (still do) sleep meds to help with sleep. I couldn't agree more about not having to hit rock bottom, and the damage that was it was doing to my family was the ultimate motivating factor. It's great that you realize that. Took me a couple years to see that.

I've also done some damage to my body. After a very good week, last week... the last 4 days have been brutal on my stomach. I guess it's having a hard time adjusting. Feels like I've been kicked in the stomach all day. It's also making it hard to breath at times. I fear I've done some major damage that I hope I can make better.

Good luck on your journey to recovery. Does your wife actually know about your addiction? I knew the only way I could stay clean was to breakdown and tell mine. She's been very supportive which has really helped.

[Jane63]

That is good news "iluvmykids"!!
Maybe it was that hike you took the other day finally catching up with you?!

I think each and everyone has their own version of "rock bottom". {Mine was when I realised how powerless I had become, that I was damaging my health and neglecting my family!}

You hang in there! It DOES get better and it DOES get easier!
{{HUGS}}
Jane

[kj0975]

Keep up the good work everything will pass in a few days and will be well worth not being controled by a stupid little pill. Its taken me a few relapses but I got the hang of it eventually. I also believe every doesnt have to hit rock bottom but we have to hit some type to realize the pills control us and we have lost control it takes a bit to get there. I quit cold turkey too its tough but your already getting sleep thats great I swear it felt like months to get some sleep even almost a yr later of not abusing seems I still need something for sleep sometimes. I try not to take something every night. Way to go keep up the good work!!!!

[Chris38]

ILMK, good for you going detox. I went cold turkey straight from takine 10, 15 or 20 pills a day. I took a week off of work and was in my own personal hell, but once the pain was gone the main thing was getting my energy back, and you will feel very weak even once the pain is gone.

Here is what I did to get my energy back relatively fast, it worked for me at least.

Keep yourself hydrated. Even if your not thirsty, drink as much water as you can. I'm a pretty big guy so I drank 2 bottles of poland spring every hour/hour and a half. Gatorade is great too, be sure to dilute it with water so you can cut down on the sugar intake, the balanace I found was enough to keep me hydrated without having so much sugar to be put asa downer for me. Mix gatorade/water 50/50. It still has a pretty great taste too.

Start eating breakfast. I dont give a damn if your hungry or not, get a bowl and start eating cereal every day. Cereals high in potassium are good, the smart start ones you find in any supermarket are fine, I switch between healthy heart and antioxidants, or sometimes i mix the two.

Take lots of vitamins. I take the following every morning with OJ, (some pulp b12 (good for nervous system), C, E, calcium(helps your bones) potassium(helps a lot with the leg cramps), beta carotine, and a multivitamin. I also take an asprin as its good to take one a day. Also I take very green, which is a good substitute for green veggies but you can probably leave that last part out if you want, but if you are interested it can be found in trader joe's.

Work out, even if it is just for 5 mins a day, and you adjust it daily, 6 the next, 7 the next etc you will start getting your blood flowing.

For a perioid of time, it depends on the person, you may experience PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome). Your body is replacing natural endorphins that are no longer there, as they come back you will start to feel better each day, but may every now and then feel crampness in your leg. I usually pop a potassium vitamin and eat a banana and I'm better an hour later.

Congratulations on your decision to save your life. I'm 51 days clean today by the way, had nearly a 3 year habit, so if you ever need any advice just let me know. I know I'm still early in my recovery but I can honestly say I feel better today than ever getting high off of those demon pills.

My info can be found in my profile. And rememeber, you always have something to look forward to, every day will be better than the previous once your past your 4th or 5th day from withdrawal. It takes time but you will be back if you stay off the sh!t. - Chris

P.S.

Soy milk. All you have to do is look at the ingredients. Either 8th Contenent or Silk is good, I like the vanilla flavor. The best part is that it is non dairy, and has 0 cholestorel. Since it is non dairy, even if you are lactose intolerant its fine to drink.

[ccgirl]

Good for you, luvmykids. And from your name, good reason, too, lol.


T1; when I detoxed, my stomache stuff was the absolute last thing to go. After about a month I would think it would be OK, then I'd have those kick you in the stomach feelings. It will pass. My detox doctor gave me some meds that people with IBS take and they helped a lot. Also may try that activia yogurt or one of those other healthy ones with active cultures. It's not a miracle cure or anything, but it soothes your stomache a little bit.

[Chris38]

CC is right, I left out yogurt, Apple Sauce is great for that too! - Chris

[iluvmykids]

WOOOOOOOW! I had given up on this forum. (i have been on another forum for years -pm when I can and i will give the URL so you can read my story) and BANG! i am overwheled with all the great responses. THAnk you so much for the caring words and the good advice. Chris-it was funny but at the time I had just eaten breakfast and was drinking diluted gatorade with water! I do exercise each day. For now its just walking a few holes on the golf course (no cart! of course) --My wife does know and she is my backbone and luv of my life! She is so strong right now. anyway --when I get PM status I will respond to each of you --thanks --I feel wanted again..

D

[Chris38]

ILMK, keep the inspiration up, it rocks. Also if you ever feel your aim is off and need to speak to someone check my profile out and contact me, I'll do my best to pull you through. Like I said, just know that the worst is over, get that energy up.

P.S. This may sound corny, but exercising to the Rocky Anthology soundtrack is great. - Chris

[Smyle]

I just wanted to pop in and say congrats on quitting.

I had a terrible addiction to hydro's/ any drug... I am very happy to hear you are takin steps to get your life back. You are doing all the right things..and your wife as support is fantastic. My hubby is so great and has really been there for me. I used for 15 years and have 1 year of clean time...It has been a difficult year but it is finally turning around. I wish you the best and keep posting so we know how you are.

much love,
Beezy

[Jane63]

ILMK,
My hubby was soo supportive of me when I quit and I know I could not have done it without him! So happy you have that kind of support too!!
Hang in there and keep posting!
Jane

[Chris38]

ILMK, just keep your eyes on the prize. Each day you will feel your energy coming back, along with a more optimistic attitude each day as long as you take care of yourself and do it on a daily, consistent basis. Keep posting. - Chris

[iluvmykids]

Hi guys --once again --this board is starting to really shape up!!! even more smileys!! LOL -- I was able to get on the golf course today (in a cart :-( ) and shot a really good score. It felt so good to feel real emotions. I havent felt that in a long time. Quick question. I am having a really hard time getting the courage to go to a meeting. The only one in my area (very small town) is an "addict to addict" meeting that I found on the NA website. I have a VERY PUBLIC career and no one knows about my addiction. I am sooooo scared that I will be recognized and lose all my credibility. I know that sounds lame, but it is REALLY the truth. I would love to learn online and physically talk to someone that way. Is that possible on here --the other forum I was on did not allow PM's. Want do you all think?

[Chris38]

ILMK, that is a tough question. I will not ask what you do out of respect to your privacy, my advice is to go to meetings that while not far away, are not in your direct area. If you do run into someone you know, hopefully they understand the importance of confidentiality, and if they break that confidentiality I'm sure you can tell the meeting's chairperson.

I own my own business and fear that I will run into one of my clients, but I do not let that stop me. If losing a client or 2 is part of the cost of my decision to use drugs in the first place, then that is on me.

May I ask what city and state you live in? Here in NY we have a board called www.newyorkna.org, perhaps your state/city has one as well, I'd be glad to help you find it. Peace. - Chris

[iluvmykids]

Chris --that is TOTALLY depressing. I just searched an area in the city and there were 29 meetings today. I searched my area (bumsville usa!) and there a 5 meetings within 100 miles this week! See my problem. One meeting is in the next town over called Addicts for Addicts --not sure if anyone has been to one of those titled meetings--How does it work for a new person. Is it strictly the 12 step style or is it something else?

[Chris38]

The principale of NA is that the only requirement is the desire to be clean. I can not speak for the folks near you, but if they follow the NA rulebook, they will encourage you to be 100% sober but they shouldnt judge you by any means. I've run into a few cult like folks who want me to look over my shoulder at every turn, but I stay away from them.

You are also not required to say anything, they may ask your name but you just have to say a first name, it doesnt even have to be your real first name(I use mine though)

They dont ask for ID or anything

Just got back from a meeting actually, each one opens my eyes and heart each time, making me feel lucky I did not have to hit rock bottom to get off of these pills, at the same time I feel guilty though when I hear some of these horror stories. But the bottom line is that I'm staying clean, 51 days today. - Chris

[iluvmykids]

Chris --I think that meetings are going to be a VERY important part of my recovery. I just wish it was not so close to my hometown. I am also being selfish because I do not want to travel 1 hr each way to a meeting in a town in which not a sole would know me or my work. Besides that --I am feeling pretty good right now. Its been a very good CLEAN day. Day 5 tomorrow. I think I am on the other side of the hump.

[Chris38]

Well an hour drive there, and hour drive back, listen to some good music, that will occupy time and keep you from using. See there is an upside to everything - Chris

P.S. I just walked an hour and a half from the last meeting I went to, about 3 miles, listened to my headphones and got some excersise - Chris

[Jane63]

How ya' doing today ILMK??

[iluvmykids]

Hey guys --DAY 5 -Hump day --as they call it. I went to see my DR. again and he spot drug tested me and it was negative. he said that he will call me at random over the next 2 years and test me. Sometimes each week, sometimes each month. If I fail, I go to rehab and lose my family. THAT AINT GONNA HAPPEN. Today was interesting for symptoms. I felt pretty tired at lunch time after working, so I went for about an hour walk, then when I came home I was WIPED OUT. I laid down for a bit and then started to hear all the kids playing etc in the beautiful weather and it pissed me off so I said screw it. I put on my bike shorts and went for a 12 miles ride. The hills were killer, but I felt soooo much better at the tops. almost like I was getting more o2 than when I was on the hydro. Really cool day. I am severely WIPED right now and I am not sure if I can make it to LOST!!!! I have to I am ADDICTED!!! Thanks --to all love D

[Chris38]

Hey ILMK, while you do need to focus on getting your energy back dont rush it all at once. If you are on day 5, then concentrate by vitamin supliments, a smart start cerial breakfast, (you may also need immodium AD, depending on how you are doing in that department. You dont want to overdue it at once, the big this is keeping yourself hydrated, and eat healthy. - Chris