For anyone addicted to opiates...

[YouveGotStyleKi]

My name is Mark. I am 20 years old, and have been addicted to opiates since I was 17 years old. My addiction started with hydrocodone, a few here and there during school so I could get through the mundane days. Towards the end of my senior year, a friend of mine told me about an amazing pill he tried that weekend called Oxycontin. I remembered that my father was on it for back pain, and I asked him if it was similar to that of the Lorcets I was popping. He told me it was nothing like it, that I would feel about 10x better. He was right. I licked the coating off, broke it in half, and took a half. I was sky high for well over 6 hours. From that moment on, I was hooked. I never thought in a million years that I would become addicted to something like this... I didn't know I was addicted until I stopped taking them about a week later, and felt intense pains I never realized before. I thought I had a bad case of the flu; the chills, night sweats, overall sweating, body aches, etc. It wasn't until my buddy came to school the next day when I was high, and told me he was, "dopesick." He described the pains and I realized that I was addicted. I was never so scared in my life, but I knew that I could never tell anyone. So, for about 2 years after I graduated, I did whatever I could to get a few OC 80s, some roxicodone 30s, etc. Anything that would keep me high. I got fired from an amazing job with Apple Computer, I lost a girlfriend I was with for a long time, and my family no longer wanted me around. This was my bottom. I decided it was time for treatment. In October, I enrolled myself into the local rehab clinic. I had no insurance, and it was at least $2000 for a 10 day stay... I got hooked up by my county with 2 and a half weeks of treatment. It was a great experience, but I soon learned the the 12 step program, finding a sponsor, and COMPLETE abstinence from any sort of drug was not for me. I was addicted to pain killers, not alcohol. I'm not the type of person who goes out and drinks, and then immediately craves opiates. But, I went along with it, and stayed clean for three months... That was until I found an OC 80 laying on the floor at my house, and without thought, I popped it into my mouth, and I was right back in the hole that I was in before. I knew I couldn't endure another rehab experience. I couldn't take the withdrawal. I was in a world of pain for a week before I finally found out that my family doctor offered his own special detox method. Replacement therapy. Buprenorphine. Suboxone. I did a LOT of research before I even considered it, then I called my doctor, and had an appointment for the next day...

Needless to say, Suboxone was my saving grace. I have only been on it for about a week now, but for the longest time, I couldn't go more than a few hours without an opiate. I was taking damn near 240 mgs of Oxycontin a day, and at least 400 mgs of Roxicodone, just to function. I wasn't even getting high anymore. With the Suboxone, I don't even crave it. I remember learning about my rehab experience, and how people literally snuck this stuff in... No wonder!

On a scientific level, your brain produces a chemical that bonds to the opiate receptors in your brain. When you overload it by taking massive amounts of opiates, the brain stops producing it, and even past the withdrawal state, you experience something called Post Acute Withdrawal for months (even years) after abstaining from opiates. Basically, since your brain isn't producing the chemical, which controls your mood, your motivation, and all kinds of other things, you're obvious going to feel like complete garbage, be depressed, and not even want to get anything done after quitting the drug.

What Suboxone does is basically helps to jump-start the brain to produce the chemical that helps control these emotions. It's a partial opiate-agonist, buprenorphine, and an opiate antagonist, Naloxone. The buprenorphine is taken sublingually, under the tongue, to release the maximum amount of buprenorphine and the minimum amount of naloxone. If taken any other way, a lot of naloxone is released into the body, incurring severe withdrawal symptoms, called Withdrawal Syndrome. This is used to discourage any other method of use. Also, if you try to take any other opiate while on Suboxone, it will not have any effect on the body, because the opiate receptors are already being populated by the buprenorphine and is additionally blocked by the naloxone.

Replacement therapy is definitely the best method of treating opiate addiction, because it eliminates withdrawal, still gives the body the tiny bit of opiates that it needs, and helps to recover the brain's receptors from it's (for lack of a better word) fried state.

If anyone I knew was debating between rehab, Methadone, and Suboxone, I would STRONGLY suggest Suboxone. Partly because rehab only covers half the bases, especially because they do not allow replacement therapy (in many rehabs, at least). Also, because Methadone is basically swapping one addiction to another, and you will honestly be on Methadone for life.

Suboxone has already changed my life, and I'm eternally grateful for how it has affected me. It has allowed me to begin a true social life, it is helping me become a more respectable citizen, both in the community and in the workforce, and is helping me get my family back. Suboxone truly is a miracle drug.

[adoublelife]

My story is similar to yours in many ways! I was taking 5+ 40's per day, and it wasn't doing anything for me anymore. I wanted to stop so bad, but didn't know how I could do it and still keep up with my family life. I tried to do it on my own, but would only last for so long. Now that I'm on suboxone-it's been almost 6 weeks, I'm a different person. I started on 4 2mg per day, and now I'm down to 1 2mg pill per day. It has helped me so much! I still have a long road ahead of me, but I intend to give it my all day by day and remain humble and greatful to have my life/sobriety back! It was such a horrible feeling being addicted to oxy's. I'm happy to know it has helped you too!

[catcrazy]

Another happy sub patient here too.
Youvegotstyle, congrats on researching and making the right decision for you!
Feels amazing doesnt it?
I dont want to be a downer, but sub gets a bad rap around the net and in many other places, for many reasons..so as with any treatment for addiction, its not for everyone.
The most important thing, IMO, to remember is to get counseling during the time you are on sub. Whatever kind of counseling works for the person, seriously.A priest,rabbi, psychologist, lcsw, support group etc..
Bibiliotherapy has been an enormous help to me, yep reading as therapy..books that are educational on topics that have affected me. Journaling is another immensely helpful tool for me as well.. Dont discount this one, men especially seem to shun this idea, but it cant be extremely cathartic and educational about ones self..
I spent time in a 12 step based rehab, and abstainance based models arent me either, I do not have a problem with alcohol and I refuse to beat myself up for having an irish coffee here and there(literally couple times a year at most?)..it is whatever works best for the person..
In case you havent found it, altho from the information you have shared here I will be surprised, there is also an advocate for bupe treatment site, with forums and info as well, that I belong to and is a great help for me, and many others. Its www.naabt.org , and they have literally tons of info on bupe/sub treatments and research, discounts if you have to self pay and even a Dr/patient connection, where you can sign up and be contacted by Drs in your area.
congrats on making the positive changes you needed for yourself and best of luck to you!

[YouveGotStyleKi]

Finally at week 1 of daily Suboxone use.

It's amazing. I've been able to have a stable social life, an even better love life, and an amazing relationship with my family. Suboxone is HEAVEN SENT!

[adoublelife]

Good for you! You are well on your way. Pretty soon the weeks will start to add up to months and so on. Just take it day by day, don't get ahead of yourself. I finally hit 6 weeks ago yesterday and I'm down to 2mg. Mad at myself tonight because I waited until 9:30 to take sub and then figured should have tried to do without or even half it, oh well. I'll try again tomorrow. So what dose are you on? Do you supplement your recovery with meetings or other support? Sub is a great, great medication! So happy for you

[YouveGotStyleKi]

I'm still at 16 mgs. I'm gonna wait til my second month to start tapering down. And yes, I do supplement my recovery with NA meetings. There are a lot around here that have such a friendly atmosphere and make the recovery process that much easier.

[Bella45]

Thank God for SUB!

[Bella45]

Hi, I have been on sub for only one week also. I can already feel such a difference, NO cravings. I have been having headaches though, is this pretty norm?

[sunshinegirl]

I am really happy for alll of you. I have been trying for months to get my husband to try sub. I know it would help him greatly. all I hear is I will.....
I gave him info on this medication several times. Does anyone have any ideas that I could try to help him?? I wish all of you the best.

[LIL_Pebbles]

Thank you for sharing, I just found out about the damage this drug and mild opiates can do, I don't know if my cells shinked or are no longer, as you know, if this is the case opaite replacement theropy, most not all have to be on it the rest of their lifes, this is scarey, but your story will reach many that are just starting out. unfourtunatley this drug some of my insure. or other will not cover, one place it would cost me 800.00 a month...the system is screwed up they want us addicts to pay money we can't aford, we most steal and do the evil to get money to get the pills, I say this the USA take car of us addicts and crime rate will go down, if not? drugs are the all time ruler and will in the end cause many to die those who are on it and those who are not. I have a a/b/f he thinks he is all that, I tell him he is not clean , he is on Methadone, take that away fromhim I said and told him to think about that, as he has no compassion to my suffering, he can't stand my moods getting off, he solution? throw a pill at me, even if i am low and will not make it...yeah this will not last he and i, but for now we need eachother pill wise, long story.

I wish you and others a solid recovery, for this drug class caled opiates.opioids will take your mind away and make a grown man cry like a newborn.

[YouveGotStyleKi]

Opiates are horrible. I'm very sorry for your situation LIL_Pebbles, but there are so many places out there that are nice and cheap for Suboxone therapy.

Bella45, headaches are indeed normal. I have them almost every day, but I would take a mild-moderate headache every other day than experience horrible withdrawals and still be knee-deep in my addiction. I think 30%-35% of patients on Suboxone have headaches, the next (which I have) is constipation. Which sucks.

Good luck to everyone. Especially you LIL_Pebbles, you'll pull through. Best of luck.

[TONYTEXAS]

Thanks for the share. Thats pretty much my story as well. I was only on the sub for about 10 days in a detox and thank god have some days clean now. In my experience getting to meetings, working a program, has to be number one. It works!

[rikaros]

I transferred from methadone to suboxone. I have been on subs for 2 years now and really like it. My body stopped making endorphins completely so I'm one of those people who will most likely have to take medication until the day I die.

I have a few issues with how the medication is handled by physicians, but all in all, it's the physicians who are the idiots, not the medication.

As a warning to all of you who are just beginning suboxone treatment. In the AE reports on suboxone (adverse effects) there is a potential for the medication to cause spontaneous hepatitis. If you notice extreme fatigue, combined with a slight to severe yellowing of the skin, call your doc immediately. It's rare, but not so rare as to be inconsequential, and can affect you within the first 6 months of treatment, as the body is acclimating to the medication.

Ericka

[adoublelife]

Wow that's scary! What kind of hepatitis? I have never heard that, but I will look into it. I am now down to 1mg of suboxone and realize as I taper farther down it gets harder, but I'm prepared and willing to give it everything I got! I'm almost to 8 weeks now, oxycontin free! This is a big accomplishment for me as I was heavily addicted. Everyone has their own personal road of recovery and as long as we are making progress in the right direction, it's all a matter of time before we reach our goal, so long as we don't give up!
Congratulations to everyone!

[YouveGotStyleKi]

Today has been 1 month of being on the suboxone, and it's absolutely amazing. I haven't felt this great in years. Another weird thing, I'm actually writing a kind of mini-novel about my experiences with drugs, from the start, the middle, and the end, the destructive nature of them, my rehab experience (along with a few of the funny stories I heard and some of the great people I met), and finally, my experience with Suboxone, all chronicled in journal like chapters. Should be an interesting project. (I'm very interested in creative writing!)

Congrats to anyone else who is doing well with the drug!

[exopiate]

I treat with suboxone--it is a revolutionary and wonderful drug for opiate dependence. I have an important comment, though, based on what I read here. Those of US with opiate addictions get used to thinking that the lower the drug, the better. We have all tried to taper ourselves over and over with methadone, oxy, or whatever...and we bring that same thought process into the subox process. Even some addictionologists miss the boat on the proper use of the drug.

Subox allows a couple things to occur. First, it is meant to be used once per day, and ONLY ONCE. That helps to extinguish the addictive brain patterns that we all developed while using, where we are constantly focusing inward, on how we feel. With subox once per day, the person is to go about his/her business and eventually lose that constant looking inward. Second, subox allows the extinction of the cycle of craving/distress---pill---reward. Like the other process, this is a learned response that needs to be extinguished over time--sometimes a long time.

People make a couple common mistakes. First, they think that the lower the subox, the better. This idea is incorrect, for obvious reasons if you think about it. If you think about trying to wean yourself, and you think honestly, are you really any closer to sobriety as you wean yourself down? The answer is 'no'. We have a mistaken belief that addiction is just about the drug, and if we stop the drug, we are better. But that is not true--most people eventually recognize that if they make it all the way to the other side of withdrawal, off the drug, what happens?? we relapse. In actuality, the person using opiates is FARTHEST from being addicted when the dose of drug is high. That is when all of the addictive behavior goes away.

SO--as someone who has treated over a hundred people with subox...the correct way to use it is to obey several principles. First, it must be used no more than once per day, preferably in the AM (so that there is no time to 'look forward' to taking it). Second, the dose must be high enough to eliminate cravings completely. A person on one mg is not getting the benefit of subox--they might as well be using chips of methadone. Although there are reasons why subox is easier to titrate down, which I will explain in my next post.

The goal is to take subox as I described until the opiate addiction is 'forgotten'. The ideal candidate for stopping subox is the one who is still taking 16mg each morning, along with his blood pressure medicine and stool softener... who forgets to take his meds now and then. The addiction has become 'extinguished'--has lost it's hold and it's meaning. This takes from 6 months to several years. The person no longer constantly 'checks in' with how he feels--he is too busy doing things in life. That is how nonaddicts live--they aren't aware of every bead of sweat and belly cramp. It takes time to get that back. Once that come back, the subox can be stopped very easily with a bit of clonidine, a dose or two of ativan, and a few days.

[exopiate]

Why is it so easy to taper suboxone? Because buprenorphine is used for pain in doses of hundreds of micrograms. The opiate effect peaks at about 500 mcg, or one half of one mg. All of the dose above a milligram is there for is to reduce cravings by occupying all of the receptors, block use of other opiates, and finally, to last long enough to be dosed every 24 hours. When a person as described above is ready to go off subox, it is as easy as pie to get to 1-2 mg. But there is some withdrawal for the last 500 mcg or so, which as stated above responds very well to a couple doses of ativan and clonidine.

[YouveGotStyleKi]

Like I've read in many experiences with Suboxone, there is always a nasty withdrawal period with ANY opiate, bupe is just a much more mild one.

Also, I have never heard of buprenorphine being used as a pain killer.

[karlee]

I have done many drugs in my life. I was able to get off all of them on my own except for the Opiates..I can't go more than 2 days without them..The longest was 3days and the withdrawals were horrible..It probably doesn't help that I drink too. However, I have gone a few weeks or more befor without drinking..

[spark-o-cet]

exopiate if you can tell us what kind of md you are and how you got involved with suboxone.also give us some statistics of success vs. relapse with suboxone in your practice.and last give us all the info that you can about suboxone and the whole addiction process including do endorphins ever really do come back like before the addiction started.thanks for all the good info so far.it seems to make good sense and im gonna go back and reread it again.-spark

[spark-o-cet]

bumpin it back up

[T1]

I've been fighting opiates for the last 2-3 years and as of the last 2 weeks I've been clean. However this is the third time I've been clean and like most addicts we can't stay away. I'm more determined than ever but I feel soOOoo run down all the time now as is to be expected. exopiate I would also love to hear about the potential return of endorphins. I have a meeting with an addiction specialist this week (for the first time) and am very curious to see if suboxone is right for me. I want my energy, happiness and ultimately my life back so I can share it with my wife and little girl but don't want to get hooked on something else. I wish I had a crystal ball that would tell me how long I have to be clean before I feel like my old self.... which I can vaguely remember.

Does anyone know if it's safe to take depression meds with suboxone? I've been on them for the last 4 months. I'm a mess.

[northbelle]

You know I am interested in hearing if they use suboxone for someone who has been opiate free for a few weeks. I have heard some people actually take it FOR DEPRESSION..I can totally relate to your sittuation. I feel like I am always just hanging on by a thread and really have to PUSH myself to do this whole "LIFE" thing. I have 60+ days and I just wonder sometimes if life is SUPPOSED to feel like this ?? Anti D's don't seem to have much of a effect on me ..
love north

[T1]

i'll report back tomorrow after my session to see what the doc suggests. I however did notice slight improvement while taking D's. Kinda leveled me out with having the super dark days.

[mendingheart]

Hi all,
I am an oldie on here, now and then. My abf has been on sub for alm