My Good Bye Letter

[VeronicaLee]

When I quit smoking..one of the things I did that really helped was write a good bye letter to cigerettes...I wrote one today for pot...just wanted to share...

Dear Marijuana:

We have had a love affair for many years. You have been the most important thing to me. I have begged, borrowed and stolen to get you. I needed you. You ruled my life. My days revolved around you. Days without you were sad days.

You have stabbed me in the back. You lied to me. All this time you were fooling me. Days with you have become sad days. I am tried. Burnt out. Unmotivated. A crappy mother. I have isolated myself. I have stopped making friends. You rule my life. I am powerless over you.

Well..I accept defeat. I accept that you are in control. I WANT TO BE IN CONTROL. I wish we could just see each other on the side..you know..once in awhile kind of deal..but you see..I AM AM ADDCIT.

I will say it again...I AM A ADDICT. When it comes to you its all or nothing. Quite honestly there are drugs I would prefer over you...you were just a crutch to keep me away from those other drugs. ...now I don' t want any of you.

I WANT TO BE CLEAN. I want to have a clear head. I want my money situation to be cleared up. I want to strive for something more. I don't want to base my friendships on pot smoking anymore. I no longer want to be around addicts who are not in recovery. I want to be CLEAN.

I accept defeat. I am helpless when it comes to you. You will always win. I will never control you. You will always have control.

Today my thoughts were on recovery and my life without you..not on how I would get some to smoke..not on sitting around feeling like crap becaues I am a big burnt out. My thoughts were on what my life could be like without you. I am turning the control over to God. and we all know that you can't mess with God.

I will miss you for awhile I am sure. but one day I will look back and think oh I am so thankful for recovery. I can imagine myself doing it. I can see it. I can imagine what that will feel like. I can imagine how much better my life will be and all the friends I will have and how much better my relationship with my children will be. My already somewhat sucessful career will be soaring. I will be working on my masters. I will have energy and be in Tae Kwon Do again. Oh I can't wait....

So for now I must say Good Bye...I will be thinking about you for a long time to come...but just for today..our relationship is over.

Veronica

[stone]

I may get hated here but pot is only a problem if you make it so.
If you use it to hide your emotions it will hurt you.
Pot is a problem if you you use it to hide.
Otherwise pot is not a problem.
I can smoke pot and then stop and feel no addiction problems. If you are using it to cover your personality problems and then you have none?
Of course it will hurt when you have none, don't try. and don't tell me it is physically addictive cos it isn't.

[woops]

Rubbish!

[VeronicaLee]

Originally Posted by stonerat

Of course it will hurt when you have none, don't try. and don't tell me it is physically addictive cos it isn't.

I am physically, mentally and emotionally addicted to pot. If you are not..kudos for you.

[stone]

I am sorry veronica, that is my opinion, if u feel addicted then I am sorry, no way you actually are though.

You think you are, try being addicted to alcohol or heroin and you will realise you aint adicted to anything at all.

[woops]

I am physically, mentally and emotionally addicted to pot. If you are not..kudos for you.


No denial there, kiddo! You will do just fine, Veronica.

[stone]

If you think you are addicted to pot well god bless, pot is nothing.

[VeronicaLee]

stonerat..if you read my letter I posted above..you would know that pot has not been my only problem. and maybe when I am ready I will talk about those other problems. but for now..its pot cause that is what I am currently using. (or was using) and I in no way intend on going back to those other problems. ever.

so for now I am dealing with a real live active pot addiction. If you have some sort of magic power that allows you to know who is addicted and who is not..wow..that is wonderful.

If you do not think pot is a problem..ask my three children. They will tell you.

[Ten Chips Down]

Give us all a break Paul, Jesus. Now's not the time or the thread mate. Ok? You can make another thread to debate that, no need pissing on hers.

[townie]

Best Wishes for you Veronicalee. Thanks for sharing your letter. I'll check to see if stonerat has started another thread before I address what he has to say. I have seen my best friend start to enjoy parenting more and be a more emotionally available parent since giving up the pot.

[stone]

Sorry Veonica, I was thinking of my own baggage, good for you for beating your demons, Dumbass me for thinking I know it all.
Seriously, You go girl please ignore my previous smartalec posts. I have felt the nastyness of pot before, please excuse my crap.

[VeronicaLee]

No problem stonerat...I understand that harder drugs and alcohol can have more drastic and tragic effects..I have been there..trust me...and I feel for anyone who is still there.

[stone]

Thanks a lot, I should have been wiser
Sorry babe.

[Pray4cee]

I will bet you really meant that pot is usually refered to as the lesser of all the evils of drugs, butwe all know, (ex- addict and co-dependants) that it is very much so psychological. There are some that can smoke pot and not have a hard time with it but there are also some who come to a conclusion that it effects the normallity of their lifestyles. I know, I was a pot smoke from the age of 11yrs old to the age of 36yrs. It's the mind set of the individual basically.
Robbie

PS. I do commend you for apologizing, it shows something positive about your character. (smiles)
Robbie

[Ten Chips Down]

There, now

God I love happy endings!

[Ten Chips Down]

A true piece of eloquence Veronica - you're quite the writer!

Very interesting approach, too. Write a damn letter of official and final DIVORCE from your DOC! lol

Make it personal. Personification of the problem substance effectively gives you a mirror right back on yourself and all the reasons why pot is no longer an option in your life.

The psychological analyses are intriguing -- in practice it's a plumb great idea and i LOVE it! Might just follow suit my own self.

Ten

[stone]

I certainly didn't mean to hurt anyone, and I have my own addiction problems with cannabis. I have beaten them and they arent comparable to alcohol.
If you think you have cannabis addictiion problems than you are lucky you dont have real problems.

[leeside]

Originally Posted by stonerat

If you think you have cannabis addictiion problems than you are lucky you dont have real problems.

How many more "real" pot addiction problems does she have to tell you about?

[Morning Glory]

Please stay on the topic of the thread starter, which is her desire to quit using Marijuana. If you don't agree with her choices for her recovery then please ignore the thread.

The best of luck to you Veronica. Please continue to seek the support from others here.

[VeronicaLee]

Originally Posted by stonerat

If you think you have cannabis addictiion problems than you are lucky you dont have real problems.

UGGG..I think we are right back where we started. My problems are very real.

Anyhow..thanks to all who read my post and showed support. I appreciate it.

[best]

Veronica

I think you will do fine. You have a great sense of truth about you.
When I was drinking, I had the mindset that going from hard stuff to just beer means I don't have a problem. I found that my issues are my issues and what others think doesn't matter. If it was a problem for me, it was worth doing something about it. Glad I learned along the way that alcohol was alcohol no matter what form it came in. Any drug, no matter the strength or form can be a problem for any person.
The degree of issues that any addictive substance causes in our life doesn't dictate if it is an issue or not...it is what we think that says it is a problem.

Mashed potatos and gravy can be as much a problem for me as the strongest drug there is.

You are wise and smart... you will do well I am sure. Congratulations on your choices.

[Brian1978]

That was a great letter. It opened my eyes. I had a love affair with pot myself I also had an affair with hydrocodone on the side. I kicked alcohol to the curb so it wouldn't be a threesome but the other 2 were still there then I got away from them. My new love afair is sobriety. I still am battling it out with hydrocodone though (kind of like a nasty divorce lol). I am doing alot better but I still have to watch out for it. I seen this letter and replaced the marijuana parts with hydrocodone for myself I hope you don't mind.

[Phinneas]

Originally Posted by VeronicaLee

UGGG..I think we are right back where we started. My problems are very real.

Anyhow..thanks to all who read my post and showed support. I appreciate it.

Yes, yes, yes and yes. In my experience, pot is just as addicting as any other substance one can name. Each substance has its own pitfalls and your addiction is just as real as any other.

I commend you, VeronicaLee, for making the commitment and taking action toward a new, better way of life. Sending you lots of support!

[Aa_vark]

Originally Posted by stonerat

I am sorry veronica, that is my opinion, if u feel addicted then I am sorry, no way you actually are though.

You think you are, try being addicted to alcohol or heroin and you will realise you aint adicted to anything at all.

stonerat -i like your avatar...BUT you're
...still one without the alcohol...

good luck veronica...
--one is too many and a thousand is never enough

[EricPaul]

Originally Posted by VeronicaLee

UGGG..I think we are right back where we started. My problems are very real.

Anyhow..thanks to all who read my post and showed support. I appreciate it.

Yes, VeronicaLee, pot does cause real problems. I have a couple of family members who are terribly addicted to it and have not been able to quit using it in over 30 years.

Here are the detox symptoms that some pot users go through when quitting pot and the possible timeliness of the duration of the symptoms. Good decision to stop using and wishing you success with quitting this crap too.

Detoxing from Marijuana


What is Detoxing?

Detoxing is the way in which your body gets rid of the toxins accumulated from years of using. It happens the first few days or weeks after getting clean and/or sober. It is also the very beginning of getting used to dealing with reality and real feelings with no numbing agent.

Can there be physical effects from quitting marijuana?

In spite of numerous years of being told that there are no physiological effects from marijuana addiction, many of our recovering members have had definite withdrawal symptoms. Whether the causes are physical or psychological, the results are physical. Others have just had emotional and mental changes as they stop using their drug of choice. There is no way of telling before quitting who will be physically uncomfortable and who will not. Most members have only minor physical discomfort if any at all. This pamphlet is for those who are having trouble and wonder what's happening to them.

Why do some effects last so long?

Unlike most other drugs, including alcohol, THC (the active chemical in marijuana) is stored in the fat cells and therefore takes longer to fully clear the body than with any other common drug. This means that some parts of the body still retain THC even after a couple of months, rather than just the couple of days or weeks for water soluble drugs.

Can this affect a drug test?

The experiences of some members have shown that if you quit marijuana and expect to take a drug test you should not go on a crash diet at the same time. Fasting, or a crash diet, can release the THC into the bloodstream very rapidly and can give a positive reading. This has happened to several of our members, but each time only with crash diets and major weight loss, not with just eating less than usual.

What are some of the more common symptoms?

By far the most common symptom of withdrawal is insomnia. This can last from a few nights of practically no sleep at all, up to a few months of occasional sleeplessness. The next most common symptom is depression (that is, if you're not euphoric), and next are nightmares and vivid dreams. Marijuana use tends to dampen the dreaming mechanism, so that when you do get clean the dreams come back with a crash. They can be vivid color, highly emotional dreams or nightmares, even waking up then coming back to the same dream. The very vivid, every-night dreams usually don't start for about a week or so. They last for about a month at most and then taper off. "Using" dreams (dreams involving the use of marijuana) are very common, and although they're not as vivid or emotional as at first, they last for years and are just considered a normal part of recovery.

The fourth most common symptom is anger. This can range from a slow burning rage to constant irritability to sudden bursts of anger when least expected: anger at the world, anger at loved ones, anger at oneself, anger at being an addict and having to get clean. Emotional jags are very common, with emotions bouncing back and forth between depression, anger, and euphoria. Occasionally experienced is a feeling of fear or anxiety, a loss of the sense of humor, decreased sex drive, or increased sex drive. Most all of these symptoms fade to normal emotions by three months. Loss of concentration for the first week or month is also very common and this sometimes affects the ability to learn for a very short while.

What about physical symptoms?

The most common physical symptom is headaches. For those who have them, they can last for a few weeks up to a couple of months, with the first few days being very intense. The next most common physical symptom is night sweats, sometimes to the point of having to change night clothes. They can last from a few nights to a month or so. Sweating is one of the body's natural ways of getting rid of toxins. Hand sweats are very common and are often accompanied by an unpleasant smell from the hands. Body odor is enough in many instances to require extra showers or baths. Coughing up phlegm is another way the body cleans itself. This can last for a few weeks to well over six months.

One third of the addicts who responded to a questionnaire on detoxing said they had eating problems for the first few days and some for up to six weeks. Their main symptoms were loss of appetite, sometimes enough to lose weight temporarily, digestion problems or cramps after eating, and nausea, occasionally enough to vomit (only for a day or two). Most of the eating problems were totally gone before the end of a month.

The next most common physical symptoms experienced were tremors or shaking and dizziness. Less frequently experienced were kidney pains, impotency, hormone changes or imbalances, low immunity or chronic fatigue, and some minor eye problems that resolved at around two months. There have been cases of addicts having more severe detox symptoms, however this is rare. For intense discomfort, see a doctor, preferably one who is experienced with detoxing.

How can I reduce discomfort?

For some of the milder detoxing symptoms, a few home remedies have proven to be useful:

Hot soaking baths can help the emotions as well as the body.
Drink plenty of water and clear liquids, just like for the flu.
Cranberry juice has been used effectively for years by recovery houses to help purify and cleanse the body.
Really excessive sweating can deplete the body of potassium, a necessary mineral. A few foods high in potassium are: melons, bananas, citrus fruits, green leafy vegetables, and tomatoes.
Eliminate fat from the diet until digestion is better.
Greatly reduce or eliminate caffeine until the sleep pattern is more normal or the shakes are gone.
The old fashioned remedy for insomnia, a glass of warm milk before bedtime, helps some people.
Exercise not only helps depression and other unpleasant emotions, it helps the body speed up the healing process.
Conference Approved Literature

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