hydrocodone addiction

[chloe06]

Blue..just before you go...I had a bad night but I have gotten up at 5.45 and I can say I dont feel as bad as I did yesterday so that is something isnt it. Day 20 today, hold in there you can do this.

Chloe

[Smyle]

I hope you have a nice weekend....enjoy the time off....

Glad to hear from you Chloe...

[windysan]

hang in there this weekend, y'all.

it gets better day by day.

[ccgirl]

Hi, I'm new here. I posted elsewhere, but I think this is better. I have been taking hydrocodone for 9 months. I was up to 8 - 10 per day, now I'm down to 5. I'm going to try to taper with what pills I have left. If I cut out one per day, I will be down to zero in ten days. Here is my question. I'm terrified of what's going to happen when I'm done completely, and even during the rest of the tapering process. Some of you sound in a bad way. Is tapering (which I can handle) a way to make it any easier? Or should I expect the worst? Does length of use and amount make a difference in withdrawals? I'm just so scared I don't know what to do.

I can't go to any kind of clinic. I can't get into why, but I really can't, so I have to do it at home. Any insight based on my information would be so appreciated you'll never know.

Thank you all.

[chloe06]

Hi CCgirl,

Tapering will make it a bit easier but cutting down one a day will result in withdrawal symptoms and withdrawal isnt easy as I am sure you have thread on this thread. I am wondering myself if I should have done it a bit slower, I went from about 16 tablets with 30mgs of codeine in each tablet to 4, then cut for 2 days then just stopped...maybe if you can do it more slowly it wont be as hard, say cut down 1 tablet every 3 days or even half a tablet. I know you say you cant seek help but the are anonymous phone help lines you could call to get some advice and support.

I am on day 20 today and although I hardly slept I am feeling slightly better this morning, that is a huge statement for me to make as I didnt think I would feel any better, it is scary but it does get easier...post here as often as you need to it has helped me alot. I look at least 10 times a day so if I can be of support to you I am more than happy to help.

Chloe

[ventuhome]

The good news is that quitting Hydro (cold Turkey or otherwise) wont kill you. ANd quitting from 5 a day will be less stressful than quitting form 10 a day. IF you can do the taper thing, go ahead and try it. If you start to feel awful, there are non-drug thing you can do (like hot baths, exercising, OTC meds) for specific symptoms. Get yourself some good movies and plenty of liquids on hand. It might still be bad it might not be for you. If it is bad, take it as one of life's lessons not to abuse narcotics ever again. Keep posting here and you will get support. there are people all over the world kicking Hydro on this thread. I happen to be a family member of a Hydro addict who has 90 days clean (because she is sitting in jail, facing 10 felony counts). Thats where abusing Hydro can land you, and quitting Cold Turkey in jail is not fun.

[Smyle]

I have done it every way...cold turkey ..tapering...rehab..jail..it all stinks yah the withdrawl is crappy ...but the fact of never using again is worse...in the long run... get to meetings or see an addiction counselor... good luck

[ccgirl]

Hi, all. I'm really starting to get scared. I just realized something. Every morning I get up, I feel really crapppy (headache, achy, etc) and I realized that it's because I take my last pill around 5:00 p.m. It kind of gives me a prelude as to what's to come.

I looked in the beginning of this site where it had resources and based on that and knowing from experience what is around here, there's not a lot. I do have a good friend who works in a facility that deals mostly with alcholic men; maybe she'd give me some help. The reasons I can't go anywhere is I don't know if my husband can take it anymore. I'm bipolar, have anxiety disorders, and I attempted suicide in April. I feel like he would leave me if I told him this.

I'm sorry to just dump on you when I just got here, and I have no words of wisdom to offer anyone, except suicide is not the answer. I'm just so sad and scared.

Dorothy

[chloe06]

The way you are feeling is perfectly normal, I have had mental health problems over the last few years, been in hospital 3 times with it...and I was terrified of telling my husband, but in the end I had to and yes he was very angry to start off with but he has come around and been really supportive. But if you are really really sure that is how he will react then I think maybe for you a very very slow tapering would be the best thing...plan it out so you know where you are going and try really hard to leave the right amounts of gaps between tablets so that you wont go into serious withdrawal...you are probably experiencing withdrawal if you are taking your last meds at 5pm.

Dont be afraid to "dump" anything here, there are people who understand where you are and wont judge you even if you slip up, just dont give up, you can do it!

Chloe

[ccgirl]

Thank you all for the support. Chloe, thanks for the advice. Unfortunately, I only have enough pills left for 10 days if I cut down one a day. It would be a shorter taper period if I only cut down by 1/2 per day. Any advice?

I also have a question. I am a migraine sufferer. I take a pill called Relpax, which is similar to Imitrex. I've noticed since I've started tapering I'm getting a lot more headaches, bordering on, but not quite, migraines. Are headaches common?


I also thought of a good stomache settler. I tried it today. My stomache started to feel crappy, and I just kept chewing mint gum. I don't know if it was psychological or not, but I heard mint is soothing on the stomache. It helped some.

[WA_NA_Survivor]

Originally Posted by chloe06

Hi CCgirl,

Tapering will make it a bit easier but cutting down one a day will result in withdrawal symptoms and withdrawal isnt easy as I am sure you have thread on this thread. I am wondering myself if I should have done it a bit slower, I went from about 16 tablets with 30mgs of codeine in each tablet to 4, then cut for 2 days then just stopped...maybe if you can do it more slowly it wont be as hard, say cut down 1 tablet every 3 days or even half a tablet. I know you say you cant seek help but the are anonymous phone help lines you could call to get some advice and support.

I am on day 20 today and although I hardly slept I am feeling slightly better this morning, that is a huge statement for me to make as I didnt think I would feel any better, it is scary but it does get easier...post here as often as you need to it has helped me alot. I look at least 10 times a day so if I can be of support to you I am more than happy to help.

Chloe

Hi Chloe, if you are doing a taper, generally no more than a reduction by 20% is recommended, in other words after 3 days take 80% of your original dose which would be approx 13 pills if you started with 16. Your codiene withdrawals remind me of something else - amongst the opiates, some have shorter half lives than others. Heroin is a short acting opiate which is why many heroin addicts have physical withdrawals (albeit very severe) lasting typically 1 week (varys according to amount used and extent of addiction), insomnia lasting for several weeks. Other synthetic opiates are longer acting and have a much longer detox - methadone for example.

I used the cold turkey approach because I didn't have any will-power to gradually reduce the dose - in the long term, you re-adjust better in general neurologically, the faster you get the drug out of your system but I'm no doctor and it is definitely not safe to go cold turkey with some drugs and drug combinations.

[WA_NA_Survivor]

CCgirl

Apologies, my last post was out of context, OTC immodium (used for treating diarrhea) if taken in sufficient doses, can block some of the withdrawal effects if you run out of codiene. Available in most supermarkets / pharmacies / gas stations - it is an opiate derivative which acts only on the body, not on the CNS with the exception of filling receptors which crave opiates.

[chloe06]

I also suffer with migraines which is why my problem has gone on for so long, I only ever got any relief from codeine, so they had to keep giving it to me even though I had been detoxed. I would say for the first week I had a headache that was bordering on a migraine, I was taking paracetamol and neurofen to help with it, also drinking as much water as I could fit in and also forcing myslef to eat helped. I am still having quite a bit of pain, I have managed to stop the paracetamol but I am still taking 8 neurofen a day. When you stop an opiate you do get rebound pain which is one of the reasons its so hard to stop. For me also crying is a trigger for a migraine so I have had to be really strong and not allow myself to cry. Sleep is also a big problem, I manage a few hours sleep a night at most and wake very early and have diarehoa every morning. I hate waking up so early but have to just tell myself that lots of people wake up early and I am thinking of ways to fill the time before everyone else gets up.

[ccgirl]

Hi Chloe;

Crying is one of my triggers too. My 9 year old daughter was just diagnosed with them also. Poor thing.

Right now my physical discomfort is minimal (down to 4 1/2) but I am an emotional wreck and dread waking up every day. And, I too, wake early. It sure makes for a long day, doesn't it?

[VegasAddict]

Hi all.... I am new here to this forum. I have not quit taking the hydro yet. I started taking half a pill a day for 7 years and only took a full pill if my Fibromyalgia got severe which at that time happened a lot but I didn't take the pills often. Then 4 years ago started dating my current husband. He is a Narcassist. I didn't know at the time but I found out AFTER we were married. I noticed I was taking more and more meds and I was in pain more often. Must have been the stress. Then I started taking them by the handful to kill my pain physically and emotionally. Now its been 4 years and I can take around 30 pills or more a day. I am calling it quits---with the meds. I am starting up an exercise program----very hard to do with the Fibro but I got to do something. I am tapering off of the meds. I only take 3 at each interval and once during that day I will allow myself 5 or 6 then back down to 3. That is much better than taking 5 or 6 each time. I am getting into different things on the computer to keep my mind active so I don't keep thinking I want more pills. I work a full time job with extended hours so I don't get to take much time off to go through this cold turkey. Besides, cold turkey can kill you. So far the tapering is going well. Its much like dieting. I hope that this site will help me get through this step by step. I will always live in pain and I just have to accept it. I would love to know if my energy will ever come back. I was very active and always studied and now I don't ever feel like doing anything. Is it the pills? Probably a dumb question. How long before I have a clear head once I quit? Any info would be great..... Thanks in advance.

[Buzz Kilowatt]

Vegas,

Concerning withdrawal, there are no absolutes as people respond differently.

30 pills/day is a substantial habit. If your meds contain Tylenol it can be bad for your liver and kidneys, too.

It is possible to taper if you have the willpower. It is a good idea to consult with an addictionologist - a doctor who specializes in addiction - or a regular MD . . . to formulate a recovery plan. There is also NA which offers group support and Sober Recovery. All of these are discussed in this forum.

AFAIK, cold turkey from opiates won't kill you but you will feel lousy for awhile. If you decide to taper, the way you feel will depend a lot upon your tapering schedule.

I used HC for many years but at a much lower dosage. Even so, I had trouble sleeping for a couple of weeks and had low energy and depression for about a month after I quit. I was below par for about 3 months and it took me about 6 to feel "normal" again.

No doubt the meds are diminishing your energy level. You should have a physical to determine if there are other causes. Depression can have the same effect, too.

During withdrawal your enery level will be lower still. However, that is temporary. My energy level has returned . . . it's better than when on the meds, which made me sleepy. My head is a lot clearer now, too. Sobriety is MUCH better than using.

It is very important to understand what is compelling you to use. Counseling can help you to understand more about your relationship.

Fibromyalgia is not well understood. My sister had it but greatly improved with a change of diet (no wheat, limited dairy) and shots of vitamin B.

You can possibly be successful by yourself but your chances will be much better if you can get some assistance.

Good luck,

Buzz

[VegasAddict]

Thanks for all of your input. I do appreciate your honesty. I made all the changes as you described for the fibro but non of it worked. I figure I will just have to deal with the pain. I have been going through this for a little over 20 years with the pain and I figured why be in pain if I don't have to. Well. we see that was a bad decision!!! As for will power. I excell in that area. I just have make a final decision. Just like when I was drinking for years and years and it was an ungodly amount of alcohol. I quit cold turkey. I also smoked 3 packs of cigs a day and I quit cold turkey but I now have a very demanding job that I cannot miss any time so I will have to kick the habit the hard way but hopefully the withdrawl won't be soooo bad. I know why I am using more than I was -- my husband being what he is and acting the way he does is very hard. Not many know about Narcassists and if they do--- fewer know what its like to live with one. Still I should have never used the meds as a crutch. I am much stronger than that. I guess its another learning lession. I have already been through the counseling thing and the docs and internal medicine etc. I think I have had my fill of doctors to last a lifetime. I lead a very active life and I hate the fact that the Fibro knocks me down hard. But again, I will learn to live with it and add an exercise program to keep my body in shape. I got everything that goes with the Fibro--heart problems, stomach, migranes, tmj, prescription changes --- I mean EVERYTHING. I hate it. But I dealt with it before and lived with it years without meds. I can do it again. Thanks again for your input. :-) I will be on here often for support.....

[ventuhome]

Hey Vegas, my sis-in-law started taking codeine for her fibromayalagia, graduated to hydrocodone, and over the years she gradually had to take more and more until finally she was taking the equivalent of 48 pills a day!! Then she got busted, had to go cold turkey in jail. Since then shes been in and out of jail 6 times, every time she has to CT, with no medical support. Its not pretty to look at, but she survives. It makes me SOOO happy to be here with people who decide to quit hydro on their own and then really try hard to do it. You guys ROCK!!! Mild exercise is supposed to help with fibro so its good you started doing that. It will probably also help with WD. I have also heard that some Essential Oils and herbs help too. Hang in there, come back here to post often and to see how the rest of gang is doing.

[ccgirl]

Ventuhome _ I can't imagine 48 pills a day. That certainly inspires me and lets me know that I can do this (down to 4 pills today) Thank you!

Buzz - You put so succinctly exactly how hydro made me feel and I didn't even realize it. The energy level thing... I used to take the pills and run around and clean the house and basically act like superwoman. Then around 1:30 in the afternoon...snooze. Hydro is a very quiet, sneaky little demon, isn't it?

[ventuhome]

You are helping me out emotionally so much! THANK YOU!! Whether you are on Day 1 or Day 100, whether you are smiling or crying, you are TRYING to quit. You have THE DESIRE to really quit. In your darkest moments please remember that that is a very important step.
My sister-in-law Mary, the addict in my life, does not have that. Despite sitting in jail for 90 days (and apparently off drugs), she is trying to weasel out of the consequences of her actions (committing a felony almost every day to obtain Hydro - she drank an 8 oz bottle, containing 240 mg Hydro a day). First she tried to get an outpatient rehab sentence, which she had already been given and cheated on. But the courts told her - inpatient rehab this time or jail. She doesn't want to go to inpatient rehab!! Her attorney tells us she'll probably get sentenced to year in jail now.
My brother is in tears. He really thought she was changing since going to jail. She was even telling him she might get out last Friday and he was planning a celebration. Now he is faced with at least 6 months of raising his son almost by himself (My other brother, sister, and I help him out when we can). We work really hard trying to stay positive, focus on the good things happening-his son, his new job. But we are still saddened that Mary really doesnt want to clean up, that she hasnt hit bottom yet, that spending ALL SUMMER in jail wasnt a bottom. What will her bottom be? Losing her son? Homelessness? Or OD'ing in some cheap hotel?
I've gotten so much support from Sober Recovery this summer, its really helped me support my brother and his son. I hope my story helps others on this thread stay off the poison today. Love to you all.

[VegasAddict]

What an inspiring post VENTU.... What is rock bottom for each individual? Maybe some of us won't ever hit rock bottom and will end up destroying our internal organs and die when we are old but just suffer the consequences. None the less whether we hit rock bottom or if we can balance our addiction the entire addiction is WRONG and is a DISEASE that each of us on here recognize is not the way we want to live. Could you image if our town was devestated like New Orleans had in many of their towns? How would we get our meds? How does one explain to the pharmasist or a out of town doctor that we need hundreds of hydrocodone prescribed for us just to make it a month????? We don't. We may not be dependant people by nature but this drug is making us dependant on the drug. We can't go far, do anything let alone get out of bed without taking the pills, thinking about the pills or having withdrawls when your out of the pills. We are giving our life to a pill. Simple as that. Sounds like all of us on here want to reclaim our lives. We may have forgotten what its like to feel like without the pills. We don't feel normal when we don't take them, we feel withdrawls and that craving and sickness keeps us coming back. I am really going to depend on this site for their thoughts, ideas, current situations etc. I am glad I found this site and BLUE pointed me onto this actual link. Thanks for being here.

[ccgirl]

I just thought of something positive. I took my dog over to my friends house today and she, myself, dogs and kids walked the beach. I realized I was looking forward to the day there were no more pills ruling my life! It felt good and I figure it's a good start to my mental recovery!

[Buzz Kilowatt]

Originally Posted by ccgirl

I just thought of something positive. I took my dog over to my friends house today and she, myself, dogs and kids walked the beach. I realized I was looking forward to the day there were no more pills ruling my life! It felt good and I figure it's a good start to my mental recovery!

That's good sign. It means you are on your way to recovery. Savor those moments. There will be more.

Buzz

[chloe06]

I have had a bad day, ended up at the drs with a racing heart and chest pains, they did an ecg and my heart is ok but beating very fast so I am stopping taking the amitriptiline..feeling a bit scared because I dont want to get those suicidal feelings back like last week but too scared to take the meds so have no choice, luckily seeing the psychiatrist tomorrow so will see what he suggests. The also checked my blood sugar levels which were very low so they made me eat sweets.

[ccgirl]

chloe, I replied to you over on the anti-depressant thread. I hope you feel better real soon!




I have another withdrawal question. I decided to taper differently, going down 1/2 a pill a day instead of one. When I woke up today, I had the ever present headache, but I really didn't feel so bad. Is it possible, that by tapering, maybe, just maybe, when I get to the end, it won't be as horrible as I've been imagining? Honest answers. I know everyone's different, but so far I'm pleasantly surprised. I only felt shaky and a little weak.

P.S. If I can get through today with all the sad 9/11 stuff and my youngest's first day of kindergarten I can get through everything!!!!!