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Old 06-23-2009, 09:11 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: davie fl
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Methadone or Suboxon for Husband? HELP

Hi Im new. My husband was doing Roxi's & how I found out was because he went to detox 2 times & now for Suboxone. The Dr had him on 12mg of Sub a day, needless to say when it was time to go back to the Dr & get more sub he never did do to $ issues?! He doesnt speak to me about his usage, I always see him in the mornings taking a pill (he hides) and says he isnt doing pills. Over the weekend I found methadone in his vehicle so that what he has been taking (he bought from a friend I know that this is a bad thing)! He doesnt do heroin I know this for sure. He has NO IDEA that I know about the methadone. Im not sure if this is a better alternative? I cant approach about the methadone. How bad or good is the methadone? I know he is trying to do the right thing but I thing this could be the wrong thing? He is trying to play doctor or taking advice from the wrong people. If anyone could give me there in put it would be helpful. Im so lost with all this . THANK YOU!
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Old 06-23-2009, 02:12 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I just wrote a long bunch of stuff to you and then I erased it when I stopped to consider the fact that your husband is hiding the stuff from you.

If your husband is hiding his using, it probably means he's not ready to quit. If he's not ready to quit, you're not going to be able to MAKE him quit. He's just going to continue to lie and hide things if he feels like that's what he has to do. Sit down and talk to him and just let him know you love him and want what's best. Go over all your options. Sounds like you guys have been through it all already. You both know what you're dealing with, and you both know what time it is, so to speak, so when he's ready to come clean (with you and the drugs), he will. Chances are, if he's hiding the methadone from you, he's NOT doing the right thing with it.
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Old 06-23-2009, 03:39 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Thank you! This is the hardest thing I ever had to deal with. The main problem is when he is weak & did go to detox twice is when he broke down & said he had a problem. I have read some many things on the methadone & was really confused as to being a good thing or bad? I know the sub is the best but I also read that methadone was a detox med as well but for heroin and that it's also a pill to get you high! Im so confused, Im so afraid of him killing him self. Im ready to give up but we do have a baby together & I feel like I cant give up because of the baby. Ahhhhh.. just lost!
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Old 06-23-2009, 03:44 PM   #4 (permalink)
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How bad is it? Well, sorry to break it to you, but opiate dependency, even in the early stages, is very serious. Recovery from it requires dedication and commitment and hard work from any addict. The good news is that we can and do recover. But you can't do it for him. You can't even help. All you can do is get out of the way and let him reach bottom until he decides to do something about it. Don't let him take you down with him.

Very bad situation to be in, for you and for him. I'd advise him to go to a qualified addictionologist with lots of exper. if he is interested in MMT (medical maintenance treatment) or DRT (drug replacement therapy) with either suboxone, naloxone, or methadone. Sub treatment saved me from a life of pain pill dependency, and all the he!! that goes with that. But I had a wonderful doc that I got honest with, and I go to plenty of meetings (NA and AA) and have a sponsor, work steps, have a recovery network, burned my "using numbers" and don't hang out with anyone who drinks or uses drugs. DRT won't work for him unless and until he wants to get and stay clean. That's just for your info, as it won't help at all to know about it until he wants recovery desperately.

As far as you, I suggest you join the folks over in friends and family forum, share openly, and begin your own journey by reading "Codependent No More" by Melodie Beatty. A wonderful book to help anyone dealing with drug abuse by a loved one.

Love,
KJ
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Old 06-23-2009, 04:20 PM   #5 (permalink)
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kj said so much of what I was going to say. I have to agree, if he is hiding it from you, he's more than likely not using it correctly. I have been on Methadone for nearly 4 years now and I can honestly say that I seriously doubt I would be alive today if the last time I was in detox, the doctors didn't refer me to a Methadone Clinic. I had tried many, many times to stay clean, but after years of drug abuse, the receptors in my brain are basically misfiring or non existent, (I'm not sure how to explain this part) so some type of drug replacement therapy is needed.

Yes, you can get high on Methadone but when used in the right dose, which is called a Maintenance Dose, you do not get high. It makes an opiate addict "feel normal" I know that's hard for someone who isn't an addict to understand but after years of abuse, being under the influence is what feels normal. When we don't have the drugs in our bodies, we get sick, hence the expression dope sick.

The only thing you can do is take care of you. I know that's hard when you love an addict. I highly suggest going to Alanon or Naranon. These groups help you so you don't get sucked in any further and let his addiction take you and subsequently the baby down right along with him. You can let him know that you are very aware that he has a problem and that you will not stand around and watch him slowly kill himself. Get help for you and maybe eventually he will see that you are doing everything to take care of you and the baby and may once again get help.

I want to add that Methadone is a dangerous drug to be self medicating with. One person can be on a certain dose for treatment while that same dose may not be the right one for another. There are many things that doctors consider when prescribing Methadone. More than likely, he'll have to go to a Methadone Clinic in order to be treated for addiction as doctors generally don't prescribe this for addiction, only chronic pain conditions and then that dose will not be the right one for addiction treatment.

If you have any questions, feel free to PM me and I'll do what I can.

God Bless,
Judy
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