Believe808 - My Story

[Believe808]

Today is 1 year

Today is 1 year since I have taken a drink or a drug. This year has been one of the worst years of my life but it has also been one of the best years of my life, and I truly mean that. When I began my recovery this time last year I was at the breaking point that it talks of in the Big Book, I couldn’t imagine life with or without alcohol or drugs, I didn’t want to live like this anymore, so I tried to end my life. My HP had other plans for me on that day, and today I am so grateful that he did.

I realize today that my life and my sobriety are precious gifts, ones that I treasure and I need to never take for granted again. Has it been easy, yes and no, life has thrown many curve balls in front of me this year, but I have not had the need to pick up and that is because AA has given me the tools and the people I needed to get through every single problem that surfaced.

When I walked into the rooms of AA, I knew I had to listen to every single thing that was suggested, I, who had 15 years sober in the past, didn’t know one thing about staying sober. I showed up and shut up, they had something that I knew I really wanted and I would do whatever it took to get it. It was suggested I find a sponsor, that was a hard one because I was not comfortable asking someone, but I did it anyway. My sponsor told me to call her every day, I don’t like making phone calls, but I did that too. I was told to call at least 3 other women and just say my sponsor told me to practice using the phone, and as hard as that was, I did it. It was suggested I make a meeting a day and the 90/90 would take care of itself, I was unemployed and I made 2-3 meetings a day, you see my life depended on it. It was suggested I take a coffee commitment, so I did. To overcome my fear of people, another suggestion was become a greeter at my HG, oh yes that was another thing, get a Home Group so I could be accountable to other people, I do have a HG and have taken a commitment of being a greeter and coffee maker. My sponsor had me start working the Steps right away, and it was in doing the Steps that I believe was the turning point in my recovery.

Has my life changed, you bet it has…I wake up in the morning and the first thing I do is pray and Thank God for keeping me sober another day. I make a gratitude list every morning, just to remind me of my blessings. I still call my sponsor every morning and many other times during the day and I also reach out to many other women throughout my day. Today I have a job after being unemployed for 17 months so it is difficult to make 2-3 meetings a day but I do make at least 1 every single day, my life still depends on them. I try to always be there for anyone who wants help getting and staying sober, I give back what was so freely given to me. Today I not only work the Steps but I live the Steps. Do I have a perfect program, no, but I do the best I can each day. I try to remain teachable never forgetting where I have been. And every night before I put my head on my pillow, I count my blessings, and I Thank God for my life and for my sobriety.

I was recently asked about the 15 years I had been sober, if I regretted relapsing after all that time, and my answer is No. What I have in way of sobriety today is 100 times more than I had in all those 15 years. I have a program today, I didn’t have one back then. I wouldn’t trade this 1year sober for all those 15 years. I am truly grateful today to have been given this 2nd chance at living a sober life.

And I am very grateful for all the people I have met through this site and another who have helped me and continue to help me stay sober one day at a time. Yes I am truly blessed. Thank you.

Donna