Finally sinking in - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

hope2be · 03-24-2011, 04:20 AM

I was going to do a step a month, beginning in January, but here it was March and I just couldn't get past Step 2.

I mistakenly thought that once I got through the first step, I could put it on a shelf and move on. I purchased and began reading Codependency Guide to the 12 Steps by Melodie Beatty. I then began applying the first step daily and somehow the cloud of confusion disappeared to allow me to see things clearer.

I now take a breather before I react. I accept what is not mine to control which apparently allows my higher power to restore me to sanity.

My thinking is definitely changing as I immerse myself in readings on codependency.

morningstar · 06-21-2011, 03:29 PM

I'm on step 2 also. Step 1 was easy, so obvious. I like the "began to believe". I'm still at that point. My belief in god is very ambiguous. I almost want to act 'as if I believe'.

What is obvious is that I have no control over ANY other human being...just myself, and even that is iffy if I am unaware of the forces of my own addictions and the past and my habits. I too am doing a lot of reading and going to meetings when I can. The real life meetings are the best.

graceandbeauty0 · 11-13-2012, 04:19 PM

For step 2 I always had faith in God. I grew up catholic and going to church and praying when life got hard. My parents have always been big on enforcing God and when I was a freshman in college I really developed a relationship with God. I really believe too that is why no matter how crazy things got and how angry and sad I just prayed and I believe that's what kept me loving my addict an truly loving him no matter what happened.

But I think one of the hardest thing I'm facing right now is a broken heart. My addict dumped me recently when his life finally turned around and I'm just having such a hard time letting go an letting god. I love him so much but I know he wants to figure himself out and live his life for himself for once. I just can't keep wondering are we ever gonna get back together. Is the love really gone

I really hope not but I have to trust in God that every thing has a purpose whether I see it now or not.

***Freedom1990*** · 11-16-2012, 08:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by graceandbeauty0

I have to trust in God that every thing has a purpose whether I see it now or not.

I am so sorry for your pain. What wonderful growth that you trust in God. Everything does have a purpose, at least in my life. It's not uncommon for much time to pass before I do understand the purpose.

Sending you hugs of support!

03-24-2011, 04:20 AM	#1 (permalink)
hope2be Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Louisiana Posts: 216	Finally sinking in I was going to do a step a month, beginning in January, but here it was March and I just couldn't get past Step 2. I mistakenly thought that once I got through the first step, I could put it on a shelf and move on. I purchased and began reading Codependency Guide to the 12 Steps by Melodie Beatty. I then began applying the first step daily and somehow the cloud of confusion disappeared to allow me to see things clearer. I now take a breather before I react. I accept what is not mine to control which apparently allows my higher power to restore me to sanity. My thinking is definitely changing as I immerse myself in readings on codependency. __________________ I need to get my head out of the sand!

06-21-2011, 03:29 PM	#2 (permalink)
morningstar Member Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: NYC Posts: 12	I'm on step 2 also. Step 1 was easy, so obvious. I like the "began to believe". I'm still at that point. My belief in god is very ambiguous. I almost want to act 'as if I believe'. What is obvious is that I have no control over ANY other human being...just myself, and even that is iffy if I am unaware of the forces of my own addictions and the past and my habits. I too am doing a lot of reading and going to meetings when I can. The real life meetings are the best. __________________ :

11-13-2012, 04:19 PM	#3 (permalink)
graceandbeauty0 Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: pittsburgh, PA Posts: 5 Blog Entries: 1	Step 2 For step 2 I always had faith in God. I grew up catholic and going to church and praying when life got hard. My parents have always been big on enforcing God and when I was a freshman in college I really developed a relationship with God. I really believe too that is why no matter how crazy things got and how angry and sad I just prayed and I believe that's what kept me loving my addict an truly loving him no matter what happened. But I think one of the hardest thing I'm facing right now is a broken heart. My addict dumped me recently when his life finally turned around and I'm just having such a hard time letting go an letting god. I love him so much but I know he wants to figure himself out and live his life for himself for once. I just can't keep wondering are we ever gonna get back together. Is the love really gone I really hope not but I have to trust in God that every thing has a purpose whether I see it now or not.

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