Questions to ask yourself while working Step 8

[nandm]

Step Eight ~ Part 1: Questions

"Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."




Take your moral inventory back out and look at it. It is an introspective list; it looks inward. Now we need to look outward, and to put ourselves in the way of feeling the pain of others, pain that we ourselves have caused.

1. There are many reasons we began to drink. Eventually though, the disease progressed, became a way of life for me. And I still stuffed my emotions. How often and with whom was I not truly present and giving my love, because alcohol was more important to me than anything else?

2. As aa alcoholic I often shortchanged myself and others to acquire alcohol. I used my resources for my addiction, and not for giving my family and me the good things in life we all deserved. How have I stolen, cheated, or lied to avoid the consequences of my addiction? And who was hurt by my actions?

3. In my disease, I often settled for much less than the best in many areas. How did my willingness to make falcohol my objective in life shortchange others, at home, at work, in relationships and friendships? Who did I harm in this?

4. As my disease progressed, I became filled with rage, self hatred, and anxiety. How did I cause injury or harm to others by my inappropriate reactions to life?

[nandm]

Step Eight ~ Part 2: Questions

"Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."




1. How do I treat people who are anonymous to me, like clerks, wait staff, repair persons, hair dressers, etc. How do I treat children, especially my own (if there are such)? The elderly? Invalids? Fat people? People of other races, religions, nationalities? What does this show about me, about my nature? Do I need to make change in my life in relationship to such people?

2. How can I make amends to someone whom I don't know, or who may not be around anymore?

3. How do I make amends to a company, institution, or such like?

4. How can I make amends to the two most harmed of all, the least and the greatest: myself and my Higher Power?

[nandm]

Step Eight ~ Part 3: Questions

"Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."




1. What do I have to do to become willing?

2. What internal changes must come about in order for me to be willing?

3. How do I know when I have truly become willing?

[nandm]

Step Eight ~ Part 4

"Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."



Question 1. What amends are obviously straightforward? I broke, I'll have it fixed. I stole it, I'll pay for it or return it. I lied, I need to tell the truth.

Question 2. What amends will be difficult? How might I go about preparing myself for them? How does being willing include being prepared? How can I resolve the issues about possible consequences?

Question 3: What is my own attitude toward amends? Where is my heart? A child may be forced to tell someone they are sorry, but the apology may not be heartfelt at all. I need to think about my motivations in making amends. True, the program demands it, and I may do it for that reason. But my heart might not really be in it.

[nandm]

[nandm]