Working Step 3 - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

***PaperDolls*** · 04-24-2010, 05:00 AM

Any pointers on working step 3 with a sponsee?

keithj · 04-24-2010, 06:01 AM

Usually it goes something like covering pg 60-63 in detail, relating experience and asking questions to get them to share their own experience with a life run on self will. Then getting on our knees and saying 3rd Step prayer together.

Most guys, myself included, can'y really see the truth of their selfishness without doing that 4th Step. So I emphasize the decision part. We have to have God's help for this. We have to be willing to give it all up. If someone is unsure (and you can tell they are unsure if they don't make immediate progress on 4th Step), I can let them dangle a bit here, reading those pages and saying 3rd step prayer every day for a week.

***PaperDolls*** · 04-26-2010, 11:42 AM

thanks keith .... this helps. I already know she's going to have some hesitation.

Decision:

the act of making up your mind about something
a position or opinion or judgment reached after consideration

I know for me ... I can make up my mind today and change it tomorrow then back again. Hell, I still have my days.

timbo555 · 04-29-2010, 06:38 AM

Is that a picture of Mary Tyler Moore from the "Dick Van Dyke Show"? Awesome!

Are you sober enough to have something someone else wants? Apparently.

Was there a time when you weren't?

What changed? Did you work the steps with a competent sponsor?

What did he instruct you to do on the third step? Did it work?

What does your sponsor suggest to you now? Do you still have one?

I think you know the answer to the above questions.

The only thing I can add is that my sponsor made it real simple for me when he substituted the words "thinking and behavior" for "will and life". It made the need for the fourth step very apparent; I found it difficult to turn my will and my life over tothe care of God until I examined it carefully. And my life consists of my thinking and behavior, my choices....

The decision to "turn it all" over really talks about surrendering to the process wholeheartedly and working the rest of the steps. And that becomes only a beginning effort in a lifelong endeavor.

God Bless

keithj · 04-29-2010, 06:52 AM

I think Ago put it best. Step 3 means I don't get to be a whiny little b!tch any more. I do what God wants, not what I want.

***PaperDolls*** · 05-05-2010, 08:03 AM

right on keith ....

Still working on it with her.
I've had to get tougher which
is difficult for me as my sponsor
wasn't like that. She was just
what I needed. My sponsee
needs something different. I'm
giving it all I've got.

And holy cow! it's helping ME too!.

Mcribb · 09-10-2010, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keithj

I think Ago put it best. Step 3 means I don't get to be a whiny little b!tch any more. I do what God wants, not what I want.

that hits home

04-24-2010, 05:00 AM	#1 (permalink)
*PaperDolls* Community Greeter Join Date: May 2004 Location: Midwest Posts: 7,828 Blog Entries: 10	Working Step 3 Any pointers on working step 3 with a sponsee? __________________ Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. --Samuel T. Coleridg

04-26-2010, 11:42 AM	#3 (permalink)
*PaperDolls* Community Greeter Join Date: May 2004 Location: Midwest Posts: 7,828 Blog Entries: 10	thanks keith .... this helps. I already know she's going to have some hesitation. Decision: the act of making up your mind about something a position or opinion or judgment reached after consideration I know for me ... I can make up my mind today and change it tomorrow then back again. Hell, I still have my days. __________________ Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. --Samuel T. Coleridg

04-29-2010, 06:38 AM	#4 (permalink)
timbo555 Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: atlanta, ga Posts: 28	1,2,3 Go.... Is that a picture of Mary Tyler Moore from the "Dick Van Dyke Show"? Awesome! Are you sober enough to have something someone else wants? Apparently. Was there a time when you weren't? What changed? Did you work the steps with a competent sponsor? What did he instruct you to do on the third step? Did it work? What does your sponsor suggest to you now? Do you still have one? I think you know the answer to the above questions. The only thing I can add is that my sponsor made it real simple for me when he substituted the words "thinking and behavior" for "will and life". It made the need for the fourth step very apparent; I found it difficult to turn my will and my life over tothe care of God until I examined it carefully. And my life consists of my thinking and behavior, my choices.... The decision to "turn it all" over really talks about surrendering to the process wholeheartedly and working the rest of the steps. And that becomes only a beginning effort in a lifelong endeavor. God Bless

05-05-2010, 08:03 AM	#6 (permalink)
*PaperDolls* Community Greeter Join Date: May 2004 Location: Midwest Posts: 7,828 Blog Entries: 10	right on keith .... Still working on it with her. I've had to get tougher which is difficult for me as my sponsor wasn't like that. She was just what I needed. My sponsee needs something different. I'm giving it all I've got. And holy cow! it's helping ME too!. __________________ Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. --Samuel T. Coleridg

04-24-2010, 06:01 AM	#2 (permalink)
keithj Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 2,763	Usually it goes something like covering pg 60-63 in detail, relating experience and asking questions to get them to share their own experience with a life run on self will. Then getting on our knees and saying 3rd Step prayer together. Most guys, myself included, can'y really see the truth of their selfishness without doing that 4th Step. So I emphasize the decision part. We have to have God's help for this. We have to be willing to give it all up. If someone is unsure (and you can tell they are unsure if they don't make immediate progress on 4th Step), I can let them dangle a bit here, reading those pages and saying 3rd step prayer every day for a week.

04-29-2010, 06:52 AM	#5 (permalink)
keithj Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 2,763	I think Ago put it best. Step 3 means I don't get to be a whiny little b!tch any more. I do what God wants, not what I want.

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