Step 2----thoughts/comments welcome

[nandm]

Step Two
"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."

Having completed Step One, we're starting to feel a little more familiar with how the process of recovery works. But now that we're facing Step Tow, we've begun to have second thoughts about whether we're willing to proceed.

We're nervous about doing an in-depth analysis of our own mental health. And we're equally fearful and reluctant about relinquishing our own self-reliance to a power we may feel we don't have even a nodding acquaintance with.

This is where we have to experiment a little with faith in ourselves, and in the process. Because by the time we have successfully worked through Step Two, we'll likely have developed a deeper understanding of why self-will and self-determination---no matter how much we struggle to apply them---are simply not powerful enough to effect our recovery.

Also, by the end of Step Two it should be increasingly clear how our compulsion/addiction has compelled us to act in ways that are not indicative of a healthy mind.

Step By Step, daily meditations for living the twelve steps. by Muriel Zink.

[nandm]

I struggled with Step Two mainly with the Higher Power concept. I had become so estranged from any sort of organized religion that my concept of God was a man made, vindictive, judgemental, excuse to hate and judge others.

I had to start simple with my concept of a Higher Power. I understood that there was something more powerful than I in this world. My original concept was based on the fact that electricity/energy is present in everything in the world. Even our heart runs off an form of electrical energy when calcium and potassium ions interact. The concept I came up with was a universal energy. That helped me to get past the God concept.

Today my concept of a HP and organized religion has changed substantially. I am much more accepting toward others religion concepts and beliefs.

I also struggled with the insanity part. I did not want to believe that I was insane as it was one of my fears that since I could not controll alcohol that maybe I had a mental defect, that maybe I was crazy. I feared winding up locked up in a mental facility. I realize now that the insanity was the alcoholism. Although I do have some mental defects, which are helped with outside help, I am pretty much as sane as the next person.

I am grateful for the sanity that the program and the Steps have brought me.

[savoy]

Before asking me the step 2 question from the Big Book, my sponsor asked me what was the most insane thing you did due to your alcoholism.

I related various drunk stories and he kept saying no, thats not it.

The most insane thing I did was picking up the first drink...every time.

[nandm]

Originally Posted by savoy

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The most insane thing I did was picking up the first drink...every time.

Well put. I can totally relate. Thanks

[lulamay]

I can relate totally to what you say, nandm.
For several years, I could get my head around step 1 without too much of a problem...all the evidence was there!
But the 'god' part threw me. For me, the key phrase is 'came to believe...'
I found the book of the same name really helpful too. x

[noad]

The God thing had me because of a punishing god, raised catholic and private schools......Spononr said one of love, as a father too his childern.....

[Found]

I increasingly see steps 1 - 2 - 3 were quick fire steps to the first AA members especially if they had hit a low enough bottom, and if they hadn't they are always there for redoing anyway - as I am having to do

2 is something like "I do need help from where help is to be got"

3 is something like "I'm deciding to get that help"

4 will then be "I'm getting that help"

I read of men that were at Dr Bob's desk and the 12 steps were covered in a day or two.

[dgillz]

Yes, read "Dr Bob and the Good Oldtimers". You'll read that they went thru the steps in days, not weeks or months.

Dr. Bob actually made 9th step amends (before the step was actually written) on the day of his very last drink.

[jimhere]

Originally Posted by savoy

Before asking me the step 2 question from the Big Book, my sponsor asked me what was the most insane thing you did due to your alcoholism.

I related various drunk stories and he kept saying no, thats not it.

The most insane thing I did was picking up the first drink...every time.

my sponsor gave me the same exercise. He had me make a list of the ten craziest things I'd ever done. I made this list...did this drunk, did that drunk, drunk, drunk drunk. He looked at and "Yeah, that's pretty crazy stuff, but I bet you haven't done any of that since you're sober. Could it be that the most insane thing you've ever done, you've done stone cold sober? And that's pick up a drink having full knowledge of what happens when I pick up a drink?"