Soooooooooo shy!!!

[REDSTAR]

i have a problem with sharing in meetings. i am quite articulet and when im one on one i have no worries. but when it comes to sharing in meetings i usually get all tongue tied. i will have great things that i would like to share but when it comes to me, its just !!! help

[Jfanagle]

I was once told, " when you are sharing don't worry about being glib and saying just the right thing, everyone else is trying to work on what they are going to share and how they will sound, and they aren't listening all that closely to you!" LOL, in otherwords, share from the heart and what ever you say will be just the right thing.

Keep up the good work, life just gets better and better.

Jon

[lostsheep]

I have the same problem. I close my eyes or look at ground and talk. it's for me, kind of like talking to only 1 person....maybe to God. After a while you can't get me to shut up. lol.

[erikm02]

I barely talk ever now that I'm sober lol

It's weird

[madhadder545]

I myself go to ticket meeting's that way the pressure of trying to find a silent part is there but If you pray these words before the meeting--God let me see, feel& hear what I need to see, feel & hear-- you will be fine you will speak when you are ready friend

[DayTrader]

Originally Posted by REDSTAR

i have a problem with sharing in meetings. i am quite articulet and when im one on one i have no worries. but when it comes to sharing in meetings i usually get all tongue tied. i will have great things that i would like to share but when it comes to me, its just !!! help

Really common, for sure.

Drinking used to really help me open up.....but it just didn't seem appropriate to take a swig at an AA table so I could share about how I was working the program....... lol

My great-grand sponsor helped me with this one. He said, "Ya know what, if you're worried about what to say and thinking about what to say........you really have NOTHING to say. Anything that does come our of your mouth is likely to be fantasy anyway....stuff you've made up or phrased in a way to try to impress people. AA is about being open and honest and if you can't do that, just say your name, your last drink date, and that you're there to listen and learn."

Over and over we hear about how our over-active ego leads us down the wrong paths. Well, that same ego wants me to try to impress ppl at meetings........and since I don't think I'm impressive enough on my own.....that same ego usually wants me to embellish my story....yanno?

Looking back, it was probably close to a year before I got comfortable at ONE meeting. Another meeting, a particularly strong group with a lot of solid recovery, it took closer to 3 years before I felt "comfortable" in sharing. It takes what it takes, yanno?

Anytime I catch myself "feeling nervous" it reminds me that I'm almost always feeling that way because my ego is telling me I need to sound impressive..........and AA is the last place to be trying to impress people. The program hinges on "rigorous honesty" as it says right before the 12 steps in the Big Book. So the question is am I willing to be honest even when I believe my honesty won't impress everyone?

........an interesting side fact........usually I find the most solid AA members are more impressed with someone who's talking openly and honestly about their failures, struggles and confusion than they are by hearing a rehearsed, articulate and polished "speech." So........really want to impress ppl? do it by getting really honest and toss out the intentions of trying to impress.