Step One

[Pilgrim]

Clay - careful with that idea that "I'm not as serious a case as you guys" thing. Lots of us had that idea but in truth, that is our disease telling us we are not that bad so that maybe we can drink again. It's not true and it's denial and it's where exactly the place where we need to be 100% honest. If you have another drink left in you because you are "not that bad" then the steps won't work.

Being a little bit alcoholic is a bit like being a little bit pregnant or only have a small case of cancer. It's either something or nothing.

If it's something, it is fatal and progressive. Some of us did go further down the scale than others but in my experience, we alcoholics are in great danger each time we drink because of the lack of control. We end up drinking more than we intend, maybe blacking out and maybe doing stupid things.

If you do the steps with a lurking notion that you can drink again and get away with it, your mind will tell you that AA didn't work and for most of us, our AA programme is the last resort. Wait until you have really had enough before you take the steps. It could save your life.

"Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed. "

Source: Big Book Chapter 3, Fourth Edition. I inserted the italics.

[Earthworm]

Hi,

When I first stated A.A like you I was also an aetheist. I had trouble with the Higher Power concept BUT I knew I had to stay sober and I knew A.A was the way to go. So I went with the flow and for the longest time used the group as my Higher Power. I've been sober 11 plus years and now am comfortable with the concept of a higher power.

Thanx and good luck

ngaire

[24hrsAday]

Originally Posted by Earthworm

Hi,

When I first stated A.A like you I was also an aetheist. I had trouble with the Higher Power concept BUT I knew I had to stay sober and I knew A.A was the way to go. So I went with the flow and for the longest time used the group as my Higher Power. I've been sober 11 plus years and now am comfortable with the concept of a higher power.

Thanx and good luck

ngaire

the group will serve as a higher power.. many have started their journey doing exactly that!