Questions to ask yourself while working Step 1

[nandm]

Step One ~ Part 1: Questions
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol ~
that our lives had become unmanageable"



Here are the first set of questions for Step 1.

1. What does it mean to be so powerless over alcohol that you are unable to manage your life?

2. How far do you have to go to hit bottom? Do you drink alone so no one can see how much you consume? Do you hide stashes of alcohol where only you can find them?

3. Have you ever felt like trying to use self-will to control your drinkin is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline? Explain.

God, Grant us the SERENITY to accept the things we cannot change; The COURAGE to change the things we can And the WISDOM to know the difference.

What we could never do alone ~
We can do together.

One day at a time ~
One step at a time.

[nandm]

Step One ~ Part 2: Questions
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol ~
that our lives had become unmanageable"




1. Is there something besides abstinence and the 12 Steps that you think
might work for you?

2. What effect does your drinking have on the people around you?

3. Are you living your life the way you want to live it?

[nandm]

Step One ~ Part 3: Questions
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol ~
that our lives had become unmanageable"




1. Honesty is crucial to our ability to take Step 1. In what specific
ways have you worked a program of rigorous honesty?

2. Are there any ways in which your program has slipped and you've been a
little less honest with yourself about your drinking?

3. How have you practiced honesty in other areas of your life?

[nandm]

[nandm]

[Freshwater]

Exactly what I am looking for!

[CarolD]

Freshwater....
Welcome to SR!

[Strangef8]

Thank you for these tools. As someone new to the whole idea of recovery and 12 steps it's good to have things like this to help me understand the steps.

[Helene]

Hi nandm,
I cannot thank you enough for posting these. I am working on this alone, but with the help of this site, and having something to focus my energy on and taking the time to ask myself these questions and actually work through them, is helping me enormously. I hadn't realised so many things until I read the questions and asked myself them. It is making me cringe with doscomfort at many points, but facing it head on, is a constant reminder of why I am here on this site. I do not want to drink. There are many parts of me saying, go on - have one. Ha! As if I could ever just have one...today especially (day 6!)I have felt a longing for that warm, syrupy feeling in my limbs and the fuzziness creeping in on the edges of my brain that I get after the first or second one, but sitting here and doing this is reminding me that it doesn't EVER stop there, and that it only lasts for at best half an hour and then its to h*ll and gone...Thanks nandm!

[Twig]

I just completed my first step with my sponsor last night. I had a hard time with it. I wrote a lot of things down, but it was hard to stay focused. I don't know what my bottom was. I don't know why I was suddenly willing to go to AA, get a sponsor and work the steps when I couldn't bear the thought of AA even a week earlier.

Then I was at a meeting one night and afterward a woman said that her sponsor suggested she write, "The 10 Things I Never Thought I Would Do." In other words, things she did when drinking or because she wanted a drink that she never imagined she would do before things got so bad.

That made it easy. The first thing I wrote was about lying to people about how much I really drank. That started the ball rolling. A couple times it almost rolled right over me, but what the heck...my first step is done and I feel better.

Hope that helps anyone doing their first step work.

[Justforthem]

thought I would bump this up to the top - as it is really helpful information.

i am going to spend the evening going through all these questions and then giving myself permission to move to step too

thanks for such brilliant information

[4dogsandakid]

Originally Posted by Twig

I just completed my first step with my sponsor last night. I had a hard time with it. I wrote a lot of things down, but it was hard to stay focused. I don't know what my bottom was. I don't know why I was suddenly willing to go to AA, get a sponsor and work the steps when I couldn't bear the thought of AA even a week earlier.

.

Twig, this was....IS totally me.

I didn't hit what most refer to as a bottom: lose a relationship, a job, get a DUI--nothing ever really happened to me ON THE OUTSIDE.

But on the inside I was and still am overwhelmed with guilt, shame and disgust about my behavior.

I thought AA was cr@p, I would never go, I thought the disease model was BS, even after I watched my sister get sober 10 years ago with the help of AA and the steps. What a moron I was....I went to her inpatient family day DRUNK! And I had the gall, the ego to think I had the answers? That I knew what I was doing? I am learning alot about humility these days.

I don't know why, but one day I just said "I can't do this anymore" and enrolled in an outpatient program. 7 hrs a week plus AA meetings and step work. And I feel clear headed, enthusiastic and hopeful.

[fashion33]

I am new to recovery and don't know where to start. I thought answering these questions could help

1. What does it mean to be so powerless over alcohol that you are unable to manage your life?

For me, firstly, being powerless means being physically powerless because of drinking. Wasting entire days because physically, I couldn't get out of bed. Not being able to manage going to work because I was too hungover. I see that I am powerless over alcohol because I am unable to predict with certainty what one drink will lead to.

2. How far do you have to go to hit bottom? Do you drink alone so no one can see how much you consume? Do you hide stashes of alcohol where only you can find them?

I'm not sure if I've hit rock bottom- but for my sake I hope that this is my rock bottom. I am afraid of what "rock bottom" could me for me if I don't stop drinking. I never drink alone and I never hide my drinking. I have a problem with binge drinking and almost ended up in the emergency room. That was a big enough wake up call for me to know that I need help.

3. Have you ever felt like trying to use self-will to control your drinking is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline? Explain.

There have been times where I have been able to limit myself to a few drinks, or none at all. So this is a hard question for me. My problem is that I lack self control...I will go into a situation where there is alcohol and consciously think I want to get drunk...and then get really really really drunk because I never consciously told myself to be careful. I can relate to this with eating, however. I am overweight and sometimes when I try to eat healthy and exhibit self control, but it makes me obsess about food even more. In trying to get sober, I hope the same thing doesn't happen with alcohol the next time I am around it.

Thanks...these questions helped out a lot

[SoberBella]

LOVED this thread - the questions are absolutely what I need and I am about to go answer them all right now.

I know I'm alcoholic, and have known this for over a year. I'm not in denial, but I do need to learn to accept the fact I can't have a drink.

Thanks for the questions!

[bballdad]

welcome soberbella,glad to have you

[SoberBella]

thank you bballdad!

1. What does it mean to be so powerless over alcohol that you are unable to manage your life?

To me, I think it means not knowing when to stop even though I know in the back of my head that it's making my life unmanageable. For example, telling myself to only have two glasses of wine, but then end up consuming two bottles of wine to the point of passing out. Or even hiding it in the house because I can't go to bed without having some alcohol.

2. How far do you have to go to hit bottom? Do you drink alone so no one can see how much you consume? Do you hide stashes of alcohol where only you can find them?

I ask this to myself all the time - is this my bottom? Can i MAKE this my bottom? WILL this be my bottom? The last thing I want to do is go down more elevator floors and end up on the street all sorry. I do not want to lose my job. I do not want to lose anything else. So to answer that - I don't want to go far to hit my bottom. I'm quite far enough.

Do I hide alcohol? HAHAHAA yes. Of course. My closet is the hiding place and I don't take my trash out unless it's dark and no one is around.

3. Have you ever felt like trying to use self-will to control your drinkin is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline? Explain.

Yes. I would reward myself in the past for not drinking a few days. I would say "Wow, 4 days without booze, bring on the reward!" And go out to buy some booze to celebrate. The more I limited myself, the more I wanted when I did reward myself. Maybe I was making up for all that time not drinking. Putting out the fire for a little bit would only make the fire rage even more when rewarded with water.

Screw booze. It controls me too much.

[SoberBella]

Found some other questions to consider....

Which of my problems will be removed or alleviated if I take a drink of alcohol?
• Can any good come of my taking another drink?
• What will really happen to me and others if I do drink again?
• What good reasons do I have to believe my answers?
• Do I wish to avoid the next drink?

[imwingingit]

I am so glad i found this site i have really been working this program by myself and getting to meetings when able to, cause of work and 2 kids that i have all the time. I think my bottom was when my kids asked me, "Why didnt we do anything on valentines day"? And that hurt so much cause that weeknd i was kinda at a low cause i was alone for another valentines and really after all i wasnt and shame on me!! Feb. 16 2009 i woke up and that was the first day of the rest of my life, it was garbage day and that meant i threw beer away and took to the curb and went to work and never looked back and have realized i cant drink at all. Im working the frist step and answering the questions that was posted and it is helping me today!!

[Cubile75]

Hi...

Welcome to SR. You have found a great place...

When you feel like it, post over in newcomers and introduce yourself... lots of great folks here.

Mark

[christian1975]

thank you so much for your post...i had just got done making a new thread asking "where do you i go from here" was the basis of it, and you answered my question...thanks again, and good luck in your journey! Christian

[JJB]

hey thanks for this new section on each step.
At last i can try working the steps on my own-well not really on my own of course -with you!
My computer is being funny and amongst other things i can't thanks posts so i had to post this reply to share how useful i found this thread

[BunnyLaRoo]

This is a great thread for us newcomers. Thank you. Going to work on my first step now!

[anono]

thanks.. i have been floating around for awhile, this is good...

1What does it mean to be so powerless over alcohol that you are unable to manage your life?

i promised myself i would stop drinking, 'tomorrow' for TWO YEARS. the last year has been frightening, yes i drank alone, because i preferred it! i would turn down invitations because it would mean i couldnt drink how i wanted to, ie quickly.. i could drink a bottle of wine in an hour, and i thought i was controlling it, because i only did this on weekends, weeknights was only 3/4 bottle!

i attended functions with people who i didnt know all that well, and had to be taken home in taxies, black outs, couldnt remember!

my work was falling apart, i work from home, though still on wages, i couldnt do it, excuse every time, if it had gone on much longer i would have been hauled in! i am back on track now..

boy oh boy, first time i have written this down... and to think i was starting to question myself, and thinking i might be able to have a couple of casual drinks!! oh oh!

time to start working those steps

thanks

[sobersot]

I'm feeling the same way. This has really helped.

[brother]

In another Step1 thread, Sugah wrote: "As problematic as my drinking was, the real problems started when I got sober. It's time to start taking care of those problems by applying the solution to them -- or else the wine is going to start looking like the answer again."

13 years ago, I only wanted to learn to abstain from a 20yr drinking habit. I put in a little effort at AA, tried controlled drinking after 30 days, and finally found the daily approach that put drinking in my past.

THEN my "pink cloud" faded and life got real. I reasoned that self-reliance had given me material success, education, status etc. These things were no longer in immediate danger from my hangovers, blackouts, dui, etc. I struggled unhappily, staying dry with a little 12 step knowledge and self-sponsorship. hooo boy!

I've lost most of those things despite "getting over the bottle" by avoiding recovery work aimed at "getting over myself" - which led me to pills as a solution.
So I'm back at Step 1, trying to sort out how/why my life is unmanageable, particularly when not drinking/using.