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10-06-2009, 03:00 AM
| #102 (permalink) |
| Member  | We are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not. . . . We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never forget. Joan Didion I used to be a lot different than I am now. And I can honestly say that the person I was five years ago definitely wasn't the same person I was fifteen years ago. I live, I learn, I change. And as I go on living, I somehow keep on forgetting lessons that I learned before, and I find that I have to make some of the same mistakes, sometimes worse and sometimes not as bad as before, just to relearn lessons that I've already "learned." How annoying is that? If we can keep in our minds the people that we were years ago, we'll have a much better chance of keeping in mind those lessons that were so important to us. We learn those lessons supposedly so that we won't have to repeat the same mistakes over and over, but guess what? If we forget who we were, we'll forget the lessons that we learned. If we don't keep in mind the persons that we've been, then we won't ever have the benefit of that person's knowledge. When I look back on years gone by in my life, there's plenty for me to be embarrassed about. I made plenty of mistakes that hurt other people or that were just ridiculous. But if I reject who I was and never revisit my past, those lessons run the risk of being buried in my used-to-be, and they become useless in my here-and-now. Sometimes I think about the past on purpose, kind of to try to show some sympathy to the person I used to be--it does help me now--and kind of to remind myself of all that I have to be grateful for in my life today.
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain."  |
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10-06-2009, 03:06 AM
| #103 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: UK
Posts: 18,303
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Hi citychick.  If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion ~The Dalai Lama
__________________  . As from a fire aflame thousands of sparks come forth, even so from the Creator an infinity of beings have life and to him return again. -- Maitri Upanishads |
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10-06-2009, 05:33 PM
| #106 (permalink) |
| Member | You know, we can't get out of life alive. We can either die in the bleachers or die on the field. We might as well come down on the field and go for it! Les Brown There are many analogies that compare life to a game. Sometimes it's a game on the field between competitors, and other times it's a board game that you have to go through many obstacles in order to solve. In all of the cases, the analogies assume that we're players in the game, not just spectators who are sitting in the stands watching other people do what they do. Unfortunately, many people have relegated themselves to the position of spectator. My guess is that usually, they don't even realize that they've done so until it's far too late for them to do anything about it. Years can go by that end up being lost years if we're not careful, and that would be a shame. While I don't believe that life is competition, as many of the people who make these analogies would have us believe, I do believe that it's important for us to be active participants in our lives rather than passive observers. Not all of us will be starters or stars, but we sure can do a good job helping to train the starters, helping to teach them the important lessons of love and respect and dignity and honor. It's widely known in the cycling world that if Lance Armstrong didn't have the strongest team in the world supporting him, he could not have won the Tour de France as often as he has. Some of the best players in football never have gone to the Super Bowl because they don't have strong teams supporting them; Tom Brady won the game in his first year as a starting quarterback because he was part of an organization that stressed team above all else--they refused to be introduced as individuals at the start of the game, choosing instead to be introduced as a team, and I immediately became a fan of the New England Patriots. Get in there and play whatever role your life calls for you to play. Play it with pride and with dignity, and be a role model for those who will come after you and have different roles to play. Don't just sit on the sidelines and wish you were out there--put yourself out there in the thick of things and enjoy it as much as you can. You will die someday, and you don't know when that will be. Make sure that on the day you day, you can say "I certainly gave it all that I got," and then you can leave this world with a smile.
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain." |
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10-07-2009, 06:03 PM
| #110 (permalink) |
| Member | Whether one is twenty, forty, or sixty; whether one has succeeded, failed, or just muddled along; whether yesterday was full of sun or storm, or one of those dull days with no weather at all, life begins each morning! Leigh Mitchell Hodges My life did begin anew this morning, after I finished my sleep. Today is a completely new day, and it's mine to do with as I please. What happens to me today will be completely new and different, and I have the choice all day long to react to similar things in different ways if the way that I've been reacting doesn't serve me. Yesterday is gone, and while some things that happened yesterday may affect today, that doesn't mean that those things have to control today's actions or reactions. If yesterday I got angry at a certain something, I have the choice today to react differently to something similar, or even to make up for the anger if it was hurtful to someone. Years ago, there was a very popular saying: "Today is the first day of the rest of your life." How true that is, yet how little we seem to take it to heart. We can start all over today, and we can start to make changes today, if we wish to. Too often we hold on to the baggage that we packed yesterday, and we allow it to keep us firmly planted in the same old way of doing things, of seeing the world. Today's a new day! It's calling for a new you, as every day does. It's offering you a wide variety of things to do, people to see, experiences to learn from, and wonders to appreciate and be thankful for. The only question is simple: Is this how you choose to see this new today that you've been given?
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain." |
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10-10-2009, 07:54 PM
| #114 (permalink) |
| Member | Study to be quiet, that is, to dismiss all bustle and worry out of your inward life. Study also to do your own business, and do not try to do the business of other people. A great deal of fleshly activity is expended in trying to do other people’s business. It is often very hard to sit still when we see our friends mismanaging matters, according to our ideas, and making dreadful blunders. But the divine order, the best human order, is for each of us to do our own business and to refrain from meddling with the business of anyone else. Hannah Whitall Smith Sit still and mind your own business--these are words that we would expect from a parent when we're quite young, aren't they? But in many ways, they are words that if we can heed them, can help us to live our lives in a much more pleasing way, that can help us to be much more content and our lives to be much more fulfilling. I have to fight to sit still. I always want to be doing something, always want to be active. But the times when I force myself to sit still and relax, the times when I take the time to allow my body and brain to take a break from their perpetual activity, are the times when I can find peace, when I can feel the beauty of peace and quiet. After a few minutes of sitting still and being quiet, I start to see the world in a much different way--in effect, it's only then that I actually start to see the world at all. In my busy, hurried times, I see very little at all. And as time goes on and I work at it more, that peace is with me more and more, and I don't have to work so hard to find it. Likewise, the less I concern myself with trying to help others avoid their mistakes and blunders, the more peace I also feel. Trying to mind other people's business is a tremendous misuse of my energy--their lives aren't under my control, so why should I try to control their actions, no matter what I feel about what they should be doing? Their lives are their lives, and my life is much more fulfilling if I don't interfere in their personal learning experiences. If they ask for help, I'll be there, but unless they do so, what they do truly is none of my business. Sit still and mind your own business--these aren't words for children who are misbehaving, but words that can change our lives for the better, if only we would heed them.
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain." |
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10-11-2009, 05:22 AM
| #116 (permalink) | |
| Forum Leader  Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake
Posts: 25,192
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__________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~  | |
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10-13-2009, 04:59 AM
| #117 (permalink) |
| Member | You have choice. You can select joy over despair. You can select happiness over tears. You can select action over apathy. You can select growth over stagnation. You can select you. And you can select life. And it's time that people tell you you're not at the mercy of forces greater than yourself. You are, indeed, the greatest force for you. Leo Buscaglia If what Leo says is right, imagine the incredible amount of power that we have to make our lives the beautiful lives that they were meant to be! If we truly do have all these choices and we learn to exercise them and make "right" choices, just imagine what our lives can be like once we learn how to make those choices. If we can learn to see situations clearly and to understand the possible repercussions for any of several possible actions, we can turn our lives into very positive, very loving forces in this world. We've had enough of people telling us that it's us "against" the world, that there's no "fighting" city hall, that life is a struggle and a trial. The forces outside ourselves aren't powerful enough to take away our peace of mind and peace of heart, if we allow ourselves to find them and maintain them. They can't "make us" feel a certain way, or take anything from us that we don't want them to take. This is possibly one of the most liberating concepts I've ever been exposed to--and one of the most simple and common-sensical. How much power do we give others to affect us in our day-to-day lives? How often do we feel bad or helpless or hopeless because of what other people have said or done? Quite simply, far too often--or at least that's true for me. I can choose how I feel. I can choose my attitude towards events or people. I can choose how I react to actions or occurrences. I'm not helpless, and my life and feelings aren't simply reactions to events and powers outside of myself. I am me, I am worthwhile, and I have the power to make my own choices.
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain." |
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10-13-2009, 07:18 AM
| #119 (permalink) | |
| Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake
Posts: 25,192
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When my attitude is gratitude, my cup is neither half empty nor half full...my cup runneth over. Thanks, CC, you have a way of peeking into my soul and posting exactly what I need to read to remember that life is a gift and all is well. Hugs
__________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~ | |
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10-14-2009, 06:13 PM
| #122 (permalink) |
| Member | The journey through life has many valleys that we can't just skip over, and also many mountains to climb that we can't just jump over. It is also true that we need the space and the freedom to make our own mistakes. Trial and error seem to be the only way we can learn and grow. Life is first and foremost a process. And this process is a zig-zag process at that. John Powell As we grow up, some well meaning but misguided adults try to teach us that one of the goals of life is to avoid pitfalls, to make as few mistakes as possible, to try to make our lives as smooth and as trouble-free as possible. If these people were successful in teaching us these things, I think that most of us would lead very dull lives of very little learning, and that would be a shame. The people who tend to thrive in life are those who realize that life is going to throw us some curveballs and that we're going to make mistakes as we go along--many of them dreadful mistakes with unpleasant consequences. Trial and error lead to learning, but if we avoid the trial and error part, just how much can we expect to learn about our own abilities and limitations? Many people become disillusioned because they expect life to be a smooth ride with very few bumps. Their disillusionment is one of the hardest things that they have to deal with, and I'm sure it makes it difficult for them to see their lives clearly. Once we accept the fact that our journeys through lives are going to be full of speed bumps and detours and other obstacles and trials, we can start to love those things for what they are--probably the best teachers we can get while we're here on this planet. I've had my share of them, and I know that I'm a better, stronger, wiser person for having passed through the obstacles than I ever would have become if I had been able to avoid them all.
__________________ " Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain." |
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10-15-2009, 03:02 AM
| #124 (permalink) | |
| Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake
Posts: 25,192
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Along the way I saw a vegetable stand at a farm, and stopped to get some fresh-off the vine-tomatoes and the best looking corn I have ever seen. They had a llama at this farm (I think they use them to scare off the wolves or coyotes), and the farm lady took me over to meet this furry oddity. As I made my way again I remember thinking that if I had not had to detour off the main highway I would never have had this refreshing experience. I've never bemoaned detours since that day. Revving up my all terrain vehicle of recovery for today, gotta love those back roads with all the bumps and detours. Hugs
__________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~ | |
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u make me a vegetarian one please RZ?
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