Old and New Words of Wisdom

[nandm]

Actions speak louder than words. What do your actions tell your friends? What do their actions tell you?

[nandm]

Recognize that we're all doing the best we can. If there is someone in your family or office with whom you frequently become frustrated, tell yourself the next time you interact with that person that he or she is doing the best he or she can at this moment in life. Notice how that belief eliminates much----if not all----of your frustration with this person.

[nandm]

Make time for people you care about. When was the last time you had a long chat with your best friend? Or hugged your brother or sister? It's so easy to get caught up in doing and achieving that we often neglect to make time to be with the people we care about most.

[Ann]

Thanks for the reminder, too long I have been procrastinating about making some calls to friends and family. It's time.

Hugs

[Rusty Zipper]

time to let my fingers do the walking nand!

[indigo]

Go fingers!

[nandm]

Originally Posted by Rusty Zipper

time to let my fingers do the walking nand!

Looking forward to it

[nandm]

Keep in touch. Getting an unexpected card or letter in the mail can really brighten up the day for a friend. Buy a bunch of cards or keep a pack of postcards handy to send when the mood strikes. E-mail cards are also a great way to surprise a friend. Check out ECards, Free Online Greeting Cards, Birthday eCards, Printable Greeting Cards, Funny eCards and Animated Musical Cards at Blue Mountain, where you can selcet and send an e-mail card for just about any occasion---for free.

[nandm]

Recognize that you cannot change other people. If someone you care about has a problem, don't make it your problem. Just listen and be there.

[nandm]

Give that which you most wish to receive. If you want love and respect, show love and respect. If you want forgiveness, forgive yourself and others.

[nandm]

Be yourself and allow others to be who they are.

[nandm]

Attack the behavior, not the person. If someon's behavior is upsetting to you, make a simple statement such as, "When you (do whatever it is he/she is doing), I feel (whatever it is you are feeling)," and then wait for a response. While the first instinct may be to defend themselves, very often when people learn that their behavior is causing someone undue stress they will want to change that behavior, espcially if they value the relationship.

[Rusty Zipper]

nand

Attack the behavior, not the person.

where is that from?

[nandm]

Originally Posted by Rusty Zipper

nandwhere is that from?

It is from a book called 7 Simple Steps to Unclutter Your Life by Donna Smallin

I would love to take credit for it myself but I am not that spiritual yet, I still have a long way to go...:rof .

[nandm]

Hold the advice. People often complain about things that are going on in their lives, but they're not necessarily looking for solutions----just an ear. Make it a point to give out advice only when specifically asked.

[Rusty Zipper]

will check that book out nand...

thanks

[nandm]

Please feel free to post anything you consider words of wisdom. Each of us has an experience to share. I would love to hear yours.

[nandm]

If you feel you must give unsolicited advice, be gentle. Always include a positive statement with the negative statement. If a friend tries to give you advice you didn't want to hear, try to remember that your friend is doing so because he or she cares about you.

[nandm]

Squeeze in friendship moments. If it's hard to make time to go out ot dinner or a movie with a friend, try inviting a close friend to go grocery shopping with you. You can split up once you're in the store. Even a short drive to and from your destination gives you a change to catch up and feel more a part of each other's lives.

[nandm]

Accept the fact that as you change, your relationships will change. Very often, this change requires a period of adjustment. But not every relationship can withstand change. SOme relationships are able to exist only under certain conditions. It's okay to end a friendship that's not working out. If the relationship is not mutually satisfying, it is no longer a friendship.

[Fluttering]

Originally Posted by nandm

If you feel you must give unsolicited advice, be gentle. Always include a positive statement with the negative statement. If a friend tries to give you advice you didn't want to hear, try to remember that your friend is doing so because he or she cares about you.

Written in my original Big Book is a saying that has become so important to me that I heard in early recovery:
"Honesty without love is brutality"
To me, that means coming from a loving gentle place with others and with myself.

[nandm]

Originally Posted by Fluttering

Written in my original Big Book is a saying that has become so important to me that I heard in early recovery:
"Honesty without love is brutality"
To me, that means coming from a loving gentle place with others and with myself.

Thank you Fluttering, I am going to have to write that one down as it is so true.

[nandm]

If you want to get to know someone, ask questions. People like to talk about themselves. Don't you?

[nandm]

I had to put this here. It is something I found to be quite profound but had never really given any thought to.

To experience what is solitude and what is meditation, one must be in a state of inquiry; only a mind that is in a state of inquiry is capable of learning. But when inquiry is suppressed by previous knowledge, or by the authority and experience of another, then learning becomes mere imitation, and imitation causes a human being to repeat what is learnt without experiencing it.

---J. Krishnamurti