Day 4 fail
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 22
Keep posting. There are others out there that are going through the exact same struggle as you.
I'm new to all his and reading other people's stories that are similar to mine has been quite comforting. While my struggle is slightly different than yours, you are certainly not alone.
I think a few of these members that have been sober for a very long time forget how hard it was. Hang in there!
I'm new to all his and reading other people's stories that are similar to mine has been quite comforting. While my struggle is slightly different than yours, you are certainly not alone.
I think a few of these members that have been sober for a very long time forget how hard it was. Hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 125
"When your ship is taking on water it is not the time to jump overboard. It is the time to grab a bucket"
Find the resolve in you. Do it for You!! Be selfish!! And everyone here has quit many times before it stuck. You're not the odd duck, you're the norm. Keep at it we're not going anywhere.
Find the resolve in you. Do it for You!! Be selfish!! And everyone here has quit many times before it stuck. You're not the odd duck, you're the norm. Keep at it we're not going anywhere.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 1,060
Keep coming back SoberNunn. In my short time in recovery the people that remind me the most of my personal struggles are those new/early/relapse in recovery. This is a deadly disease for all of us, it will kill us. Most of us are passionate about what works for us and want to share with others.
Good luck and many prayers..
Something to consider, this forum is world wide. Therefore we have many cultural and language differences among the membership.
Good luck and many prayers..
Something to consider, this forum is world wide. Therefore we have many cultural and language differences among the membership.
LoveHateMerlot
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Texas
Posts: 68
Oh my gosh don't go SoberNunn! The best part about us, is that none of us quit once. I am only on day 15, I have failed quitting SO many times. Stay here, nobody is judging you for relapsing...we all are going through it or have gone through it. We love you and support you! xoxoxo
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 296
Also, everyone here is pretty amazing. I think I can be a bit over sensitive sometimes too. I think there's a major element of shame for me too as I keep falling off the wagon. I've found that although I'm drinking less often I am drinking much more on the occasions I do. Hence there is a lot of guilt.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
Originally Posted by SoberNunn 
Also, everyone here is pretty amazing. I think I can be a bit over sensitive sometimes too. I think there's a major element of shame for me too as I keep falling off the wagon. I've found that although I'm drinking less often I am drinking much more on the occasions I do. Hence there is a lot of guilt.
Hang in there and God bless!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
I think there's a major element of shame for me too as I keep falling off the wagon
part of that could be because you never get all the way ON the wagon, with a good secure seat and a nice snug seatbelt. if you're riding in the back and the wagon hits a couple of bumps, it's easy to fall off!
it's the whole Yoda thing about try and do.
here's a big secret. it's really a LOT easier to STAY quit than to keep TRYING to quit. once you commit, that's it! no means no. not today, not tonite, not because it's raining, or i'm thirsty, or someone yelled at me, or i feel sad, glad, depressed, tearful, joyful, not because of cramps, or birthdays, or burnt lasagne. not if it's given to me for free. not if i want to, or think i want to. NO MORE EXCUSES, PERIOD.
part of that could be because you never get all the way ON the wagon, with a good secure seat and a nice snug seatbelt. if you're riding in the back and the wagon hits a couple of bumps, it's easy to fall off!
it's the whole Yoda thing about try and do.
here's a big secret. it's really a LOT easier to STAY quit than to keep TRYING to quit. once you commit, that's it! no means no. not today, not tonite, not because it's raining, or i'm thirsty, or someone yelled at me, or i feel sad, glad, depressed, tearful, joyful, not because of cramps, or birthdays, or burnt lasagne. not if it's given to me for free. not if i want to, or think i want to. NO MORE EXCUSES, PERIOD.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 1,543
Tough Love?
I'm new around here (well back after a ten year absence) but I find the concept of tough love that some veterans advocate counter intuitive? Isn't it true that we all have to commit to giving up completely by our own volition? I don't think I have read about, or met a person, who quit because a tough message was put forth?
On a similar note - and specific to this section of the forum - this is "Newcomers to Recovery". The people posting in here are exactly that and a lot of us will slip as we seek to find peace in total long term sobriety. Some of us will fail and post as much. Some of us will graduate to other sections of the forum perhaps? What I would say is that any veteran who gets frustrated with people that "don't seem to be getting the message" then this perhaps isn't the place for you to be? Because you're going to see one hell of a lot of people that are more disappointed in themselves than you're ever going to be in them.
On a similar note - and specific to this section of the forum - this is "Newcomers to Recovery". The people posting in here are exactly that and a lot of us will slip as we seek to find peace in total long term sobriety. Some of us will fail and post as much. Some of us will graduate to other sections of the forum perhaps? What I would say is that any veteran who gets frustrated with people that "don't seem to be getting the message" then this perhaps isn't the place for you to be? Because you're going to see one hell of a lot of people that are more disappointed in themselves than you're ever going to be in them.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 296
Originally Posted by JustTony
I'm new around here (well back after a ten year absence) but I find the concept of tough love that some veterans advocate counter intuitive? Isn't it true that we all have to commit to giving up completely by our own volition? I don't think I have read about, or met a person, who quit because a tough message was put forth?
On a similar note - and specific to this section of the forum - this is "Newcomers to Recovery". The people posting in here are exactly that and a lot of us will slip as we seek to find peace in total long term sobriety. Some of us will fail and post as much. Some of us will graduate to other sections of the forum perhaps? What I would say is that any veteran who gets frustrated with people that "don't seem to be getting the message" then this perhaps isn't the place for you to be? Because you're going to see one hell of a lot of people that are more disappointed in themselves than you're ever going to be in them.
On a similar note - and specific to this section of the forum - this is "Newcomers to Recovery". The people posting in here are exactly that and a lot of us will slip as we seek to find peace in total long term sobriety. Some of us will fail and post as much. Some of us will graduate to other sections of the forum perhaps? What I would say is that any veteran who gets frustrated with people that "don't seem to be getting the message" then this perhaps isn't the place for you to be? Because you're going to see one hell of a lot of people that are more disappointed in themselves than you're ever going to be in them.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,637
SN- just make sure the tough self-love is balanced out with reminding yourself of the good stuff you and achieve when sober. Guilt and shame, anger and resentments can be huge triggers.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,533
I felt like that too when I joined in 2013. But it's not like that here on SR. I've relapsed time and time again... Yes it's hard to admit it because everyone gives such amazing advice and it's almost like we let them down when we just don't listen. But that's not the case. And most people here know that addiction isn't just about not listening, it's way deeper than that. Keep trying. Never give up. No matter what. Get comfortable on here and know that the majority of members aren't judging you at all. And most everyone here is here for the same reasons. There are also likely alot of members here that also relapse and may not have the courage to post about it and can really use your honesty to help them with their own problem. xoxo
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