sleepie

Delfin... I ate croissants today. I went nuts...

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down the hatch. That's right you read that right... four croissants.

I am reverting back to my binge-y overeating ways in sobriety.

I did walk a lot today and did a super quick 10 minutes on my stepper... but yeah it's not good!

How you faring Delf?

sleepie

Well I have been trying to draw for weeks. Just nothing happens, I have zero imagination, zero ideas. I want to stay in bed all day.

it's a completely uninspired life. At nearly a year sober I guess it's all dried up. My best years are behind me.

It was all I had, I don't have it anymore. I feel less than human.

I have unfinished paintings, half started drawings that are stagnating, I can't even care and it's as if the whole world's gone dull. I can't force it. I just sit there... nothing. I am familiar with this old feeling. Sadness, broken heart and anxiety. That's all. No ideas, no interest. Back to my dead eyed, pre-drinking self.

I'm so bummed out. I was all "I'm gonna do things today and make something and get something done today...". Nope.