Back to 3 days.... but ok with it.
Back to 3 days.... but ok with it.
I travel a lot with my work and lots of the networking and social time is spent drinking. I have struggled with not getting a drink at these times. I gave in and drank on Wednesday night. Didn't have a fun night and was awfully sick the next day. With every drink ordered I kept thinking that I really didn't want it but did it anyway. The next day I kept wondering why I did it, because I really didn't want to. I was sober over 70 days before this and I was feeling pretty great but kept struggling with the craving and felt like I was missing out. I know now that I haven't been missing out and am ready for this to be my life and I'm completely fine without alcohol. I want to say that this was my awakening and am very grateful for it.
Point being...most of us didn't "want" to do any recovery program at first. I know I didn't, because it meant that I had to admit/accept my addiction was real. But at the end of the day, you get exactly as much back out of your recovery as you put into it, right?
I am around alcohol daily. My husband drinks every day and with my work it seems that all the networking and social time there is alcohol. It's weird, but I'm more tempted when I'm alone.
I don't think that's weird at all. The majority if my drinking was done alone too by choice. I would stop at a favorite spot for a few beers on the way home from work, but the heavy drinking was done by myself out in the garage or wherever else I could hide from everyone while I was doing it.
That's why for me personally, it wasn't so much about avoiding "triggers" or drinking situations...I drank all the time, everywhere for the most part. I had to make the transition to learning how to live my life purposefully without alcohol...instead of just trying to "not drink". In other words, the problem was ME - not people or things around me.
That's why for me personally, it wasn't so much about avoiding "triggers" or drinking situations...I drank all the time, everywhere for the most part. I had to make the transition to learning how to live my life purposefully without alcohol...instead of just trying to "not drink". In other words, the problem was ME - not people or things around me.
I am getting so much done now that I have stopped drinking. I am a better person now and starting to like myself again.
Just keep trying ladybug. Use every tool you have to quit drinking. Take action, lots of it. Just remember alcoholism is a deadly insidious progressive disease. The fact that you cameback is a miracle. This disease is more than just getting drunk and feeling bad the next day. It's about destroying your health and surcoming to the effects of ingesting copious amounts of poison over time. It will never get easier to quit. Only more difficult with time.
Social settings are a joke compared to death from alcoholism. Just my opinion.
Hang in there girl. Just don't drink today.
Social settings are a joke compared to death from alcoholism. Just my opinion.
Hang in there girl. Just don't drink today.
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