Angie 247's thread - This new sober life Part 4
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
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Thank you so much glee and venuscat. 
The brain fog has lifted!! Well, for the past couple of days it has anyway. I don't know if and when it will come back but I'm enjoying that it's gone right now. Getting so much done at work and at home. Feeling so much better.
I'll hit 5 months on Friday. Awesome. Very grateful. Thank you SR!! I know we have a lot of guests on the forums and I would encourage them to sign up and post, SR is life changing. It can be scary to share but the people here are wonderful. SR is so supportive and people want to help.
The brain fog has lifted!! Well, for the past couple of days it has anyway. I don't know if and when it will come back but I'm enjoying that it's gone right now. Getting so much done at work and at home. Feeling so much better.
I'll hit 5 months on Friday. Awesome. Very grateful. Thank you SR!! I know we have a lot of guests on the forums and I would encourage them to sign up and post, SR is life changing. It can be scary to share but the people here are wonderful. SR is so supportive and people want to help.
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
Feeling really low tonight. Not drinking. I'm going to go to work tomorrow and hopefully it will be a better day in the morning. I'll try to leave the house early and get the chai tea from Starbucks. I don't have my son tonight, and I've been crying pretty much for two hours. Trying to hide it from Elvis when he jumps on the bed. I filled his water and food bowl when I got home and pretty much haven't left the bed since. I cuddled him for a time but he's not too much of a cuddler anymore. He enjoyed the head rub anyway. Having the worst thoughts about myself and I just want to get a good nights sleep.
sweet Angie Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,506
Originally Posted by Angie247 
Feeling really low tonight. Not drinking. I'm going to go to work tomorrow and hopefully it will be a better day in the morning. I'll try to leave the house early and get the chai tea from Starbucks. I don't have my son tonight, and I've been crying pretty much for two hours. Trying to hide it from Elvis when he jumps on the bed. I filled his water and food bowl when I got home and pretty much haven't left the bed since. I cuddled him for a time but he's not too much of a cuddler anymore. He enjoyed the head rub anyway. Having the worst thoughts about myself and I just want to get a good nights sleep.
I know those thoughts....I have been having some of those thoughts as well. Gosh, why? Neither of us deserve it. Look how hard we try, always.
Progress not perfection. I know that is not always easy to feel good about, but we are fighting for the wonderful lives that are in front of us....we can do this.
I mentioned last week that your mirror was lying to you. Mine was too.
So we changed the light globes....really....sometimes what you think you see is just not there. Keep fighting to see the lovely person you are....she is looking back at you, waiting for you to smile at her.
Have a good Friday love.
♥
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
You are all so wonderful! Thank you!! The support and kindness you have all shown to me will be something that I can never thank you enough for. <3
Went to work and thoughts of drinking came up more than they have in these 5 months. Played the tape through and knew life would be a absolute nightmare if I started back. I'm home, picked up a steak sandwich and lemonade and I won't be drinking tonight. I'm five months sober today and grateful to be able to say that.
Went to work and thoughts of drinking came up more than they have in these 5 months. Played the tape through and knew life would be a absolute nightmare if I started back. I'm home, picked up a steak sandwich and lemonade and I won't be drinking tonight. I'm five months sober today and grateful to be able to say that.
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
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So I'm not doing too well emotionally. Just one of those days. Stressing out and tired of dealing with my son's father and his moods. Work is stressful but I'm grateful for the job. I'm not drinking however. Thoughts of it have come up though. I don't have to do what my thoughts say. My birthday is coming up next month and my very sweet parents gave me a gift card to an online store where I bought a pretty cheap juicer. It arrived the other day. I'm headed out to the dollar store first to see what ingredients they have there then the grocery store. It's also 1:30pm and I haven't eaten or had anything to drink so I need to have lunch. I did take a shower and I'm about to head out.
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Originally Posted by Angie247
So I'm not doing too well emotionally. Just one of those days. Stressing out and tired of dealing with my son's father and his moods. Work is stressful but I'm grateful for the job. I'm not drinking however. Thoughts of it have come up though. I don't have to do what my thoughts say. My birthday is coming up next month and my very sweet parents gave me a gift card to an online store where I bought a pretty cheap juicer. It arrived the other day. I'm headed out to the dollar store first to see what ingredients they have there then the grocery store. It's also 1:30pm and I haven't eaten or had anything to drink so I need to have lunch. I did take a shower and I'm about to head out.
Agreed; thoughts are just thoughts and you can always ignore or reverse them.
Happy Birthday a little early.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
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So, what juice did you make?
And it seems you do one of the things I do, which is not eat enough.
Nick is always reminding me that I need to eat during the day. I tend to wait, and it most definitely affects my mood.
I so hope your day improved love. ♥
PS...Hope I didn't sound bossy....
And it seems you do one of the things I do, which is not eat enough.
Nick is always reminding me that I need to eat during the day. I tend to wait, and it most definitely affects my mood.
I so hope your day improved love.
♥PS...Hope I didn't sound bossy....
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
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Thank you all so much. I'm doing better. Venuscat, you did not sound bossy in the slightest. I appreciate you so much! I decided to start off easy and made a banana and mandarin orange smoothie with cinnamon and low fat milk. It was pretty tasty and I want to start using it with veggies next week. Ended up getting a bbq chicken plate with potato salad plus a corn muffin for lunch. They gave me an extra corn muffin because I tipped them in the drive thru. That was sweet and oh, it was goooood lol. My mom's potato salad is my favorite but that today had to have been the 2nd best that I've ever had. Had enough for leftovers for dinner although I wasn't very hungry. Feeling ok now, some worries but I keep telling myself that I can't do anything about it at this moment. I can't make my neighbors dog stop barking in the middle of the night, bills go away, work less stressful and I can't make my ex husband nicer. My neighbor's dog barks in the middle of the night and then I get all riled up and can't go back to sleep. Lack of sleep has been a killer for my mood this week. I've gotten to where I turn on my huge industrial fan to try to stop from hearing him. All I can do is my best and not react to things that can make it worse but I will stand up for myself when the need fits. One big thing is to not pick up the alcohol again. I know I need to just take it one day at a time but I want to say 6 months sober and so on. It can happen, one day at a time. One minute at a time if need be.
I appreciate you so much! I decided to start off easy and made a banana and mandarin orange smoothie with cinnamon and low fat milk. It was pretty tasty and I want to start using it with veggies next week. Ended up getting a bbq chicken plate with potato salad plus a corn muffin for lunch. They gave me an extra corn muffin because I tipped them in the drive thru. That was sweet and oh, it was goooood lol. My mom's potato salad is my favorite but that today had to have been the 2nd best that I've ever had. Had enough for leftovers for dinner although I wasn't very hungry. Feeling ok now, some worries but I keep telling myself that I can't do anything about it at this moment. I can't make my neighbors dog stop barking in the middle of the night, bills go away, work less stressful and I can't make my ex husband nicer. My neighbor's dog barks in the middle of the night and then I get all riled up and can't go back to sleep. Lack of sleep has been a killer for my mood this week. I've gotten to where I turn on my huge industrial fan to try to stop from hearing him. All I can do is my best and not react to things that can make it worse but I will stand up for myself when the need fits. One big thing is to not pick up the alcohol again. I know I need to just take it one day at a time but I want to say 6 months sober and so on. It can happen, one day at a time. One minute at a time if need be.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,506
Accepting the things we cannot change....and courage to change what we can.
Which for me is always my attitude.
I needed this reminder today ~ have to fly back to Australia tomorrow, and then back here again next Sunday. It is a lot. And there are many emotions involved. I kind of want to run away and hide under a bush, but I can't do that.
One hour at a time, one day at a time. And together.
Love you Angie, always proud of you. ♥
Which for me is always my attitude.
I needed this reminder today ~ have to fly back to Australia tomorrow, and then back here again next Sunday. It is a lot. And there are many emotions involved. I kind of want to run away and hide under a bush, but I can't do that.
One hour at a time, one day at a time. And together.
Love you Angie, always proud of you.
♥
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