chrcarlson

bluedog, I feel like that sometimes. It's not really health. You are the sum of your experiences. The past is fun or sad to think about sometimes but we can't get it back. Today and tomorrow are more exciting anyway. I'm trying to make some plans for my future, it's fun to think about.

bluedog97

Last night I posted that in the midst of a craving/anxiety attack. I think posting about my fear/regret has helped it lose some of its power. Plus the feedback shows others relate and also point out some errors in my thinking.

I think a lot of it is pressure I feel, such as from my family (yes, still. I'm an adult) to be who they expect me to be. For much of my life I've tried to live up to and even exceed their expectations. Well, I failed at that. I realize I've been in competition with them, to become so great and powerful that they are in awe.

Maybe the key is just discoving who I was really meant to be, instead of locked in some competitive struggle with others who have no intention seeing me succeed.

thomas11

I used poo-poo cliche's and sayings like what Anna has mentioned or what my wife tells me all the time which is that everything happens for a reason.

I don't anymore, I believe them.

Berrybean

Yep.

But I've realised that all kinds of thoughts float through my head, and I don't need to velcro myself to the ones that actually aren't helpful.

We do tend to choose to look at the world through a hole in the fence just below the cows tail. The answer for me was to recognise my faulty perspective and adjust it - which might be as simple (simple, not necessarily easy!!) as making a firm decision NOT to pursue those thoughts, and take my mind somewhere else - maybe to a gratitude list. Maybe go help someone else. Maybe do some mindful meditation to get my head back into the here and now (which is, after all, the only thing we can change anyway).

Soberwolf

Good stuff BD

everything does happen for a reason have a great day