jessie65

How can you possibly know if inpatient will work for you if you walked out in 2 hours?
You say you're trying hard but most people don't see that as trying at all. Trying hard to most is what Dee described.

Yes, early sobriety is so uncomfortable, but the urges are not impossible to overcome.
I've had tears just rolling down my face I've wanted a drink so bad, but I don't drink. I've clenched my fists and punched my pillow, but I don't drink. Some people do it the smart way, lol, just keep busier, do Something to distract yourself, just don't drink. You need to give it some effort if you want results. It does get easier.

Unfortunately, sobriety can't be bought. Money or not, not everything in life will come so easy. Sure, you can go to a luxurious rehab, a benefit most don't have, but sobriety doesn't cost a dime for those who really want it. There's tons of help out there to make it a bit easier, but at the end of the day it's all on you. It will come from within you.
How bad do you really want it?

Dharma33

Hi Mike, it has all been said.

Since at this moment, you feel pretty well it seems....get back to the Rehab facility, with your own linens and stay.

I bet after 90 days you would be well on your way to a new life.

Don't give up.

Everyone here wants you well.

FreeOwl

Sobriety and facing the trauma you've gone through are not separate, discreet things.

They are forever linked, intricately interwoven, parts of the same whole.

So is living the way you are and continuing to try and suppress the trauma.

One path is toward healing.

The other path is toward insanity or worse.

The choice of paths is yours.

thomas11

Mike, you went to your parents house for a period time and its an alcohol free zone. You said the urge to drink was so strong you almost passed out. Would you mind elaborating on that? I'm very curious. You were obviously sober, but were strongly compelled to return home and drink beer, correct? Did you feel any sense of gratitude or appreciation for the fact that you had detoxed your body from alcohol and you felt "good"?

Lastly, I only wish you the best man, I mean that sincerely.

MikeM

Thanks. Btw, to all, I will only reply here and there. I started drinking yesterday afternoon, didn't sleep but drank, and am still doing it.

So if I miss something, consider the focus I have now.

About the passing out, it was a head rush. An intense feeling of wanting to drink that started in my stomach and rushed up to my head. Turned the lights off momentarily, but I managed to stay conscious. Had it taken a second longer, I would have been on the floor.

Coldfusion

Mike, I am really disappointed that you are still drinking. You said you have the power to quit on your own, but it's not happening. I hope you call for help soon.

thomas11

Thanks for answering Mike, ok, so logically my next question for you is this: What made you conclude that returning to your house to drink would be helpful? Because obviously you thought that would help you in some way or you would not have done it, as you are obviously an intelligent person.

Dyl71

Mike,

Can I ask you a question?

What exactly do you want from us here at SR?

To get back to basics - HOW can we HELP you?

Anna

I think this thread has run its course.