From South Asia
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: WI
Posts: 529
Hey Horatio, welcome!
I've got close connections to South Asia.
It's amazing how quickly we forget the regretful part of drinking. The beast loves to tempt us with the "good" part of the experience. "It will be different this time--honest!"
I've listened to that far too many times.
I've got close connections to South Asia.
It's amazing how quickly we forget the regretful part of drinking. The beast loves to tempt us with the "good" part of the experience. "It will be different this time--honest!"
I've listened to that far too many times.
South Asian
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 121
28 days sober. This last Saturday was hard. Generally a bad day. Misanthropic tendencies came to the fore. Normally, would have hit the bottle. Which would have just calmed everything down for a while. It would have made me feel better that night. But not the next morning. Sometimes my mind says to me that just a few inebriated hours is worth the many hours of suffering that are bound to follow. Luckily, I didn't drink. Even though someone got me to smell some dodgy hooch to check if I could tell from the fragrance whether it was ok. Hmmm. To be honest I had no idea. Anyhow, still sober. Still struggling a little. The coming weekend will be a real challenge. I will be on a break with my family. There will be booze easily available. I will have been sober over a month. In the past, I would have really enjoyed knocking back a bottle of wine and going for a nice dinner on occasions such as this. It will be a battle.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 74
Great work!
"Luckily, I didn't drink."
I hope you don't mind I weigh in...I share your struggle and the 'addictive voice' issues. I think we all do. I think luck might have something to do with it, but hope that you are starting to realize (as I am - finally) that you have a right to make the decision to ignore the AV. Kick it to the curb.... Make a conscious decision to be aware of that nasty seductive voice over your shoulder and ignore it. Even if it is only minute to minute. Even if you are white knuckling it to get through an urge to drink. I have had a few moments in the last two weeks, but they have been easy. I think the larger challenges are to come yet. You are ahead of me! I am pulling for you....you can do this....lets do this together! Life is beautiful, but I think we have to be aware of it to realize it.
I hope you don't mind me blathering on so....I am pulling for you!
I hope you don't mind I weigh in...I share your struggle and the 'addictive voice' issues. I think we all do. I think luck might have something to do with it, but hope that you are starting to realize (as I am - finally) that you have a right to make the decision to ignore the AV. Kick it to the curb.... Make a conscious decision to be aware of that nasty seductive voice over your shoulder and ignore it. Even if it is only minute to minute. Even if you are white knuckling it to get through an urge to drink. I have had a few moments in the last two weeks, but they have been easy. I think the larger challenges are to come yet. You are ahead of me! I am pulling for you....you can do this....lets do this together! Life is beautiful, but I think we have to be aware of it to realize it.
I hope you don't mind me blathering on so....I am pulling for you!
South Asian
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 121
After 31 days. Fell off the wagon. I realised when I was doing it, that this was silly. And I knew where it would end. Four further days of drinking followed. The second last day I was drinking whisky by 11.30 am. The last day I needed a vodka at 10.15 am just to be able to face a meeting. Insanity. 2 days sober now. After drinking 90 units in five days. All this counting of units, to try and reassure myself that I am somehow ok. When I need to realise I am not. There is a predictability to my relapses which is almost self fulfilling. A bit frustrated with myself and my failures. But going to try again. How to slay this demon for good?
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: PA
Posts: 695
Horatio- When I first quit drinking I had to constantly say (no yell) to myself NO. Because memories do fade and soon that little voice in your head is telling you to go ahead and drink...just one. Or "you weren't that bad, have one". Or my favorite "have a drink, you earned it." So I would literally yell NO. That was over 7 years ago. Every once in a while (yes even after 7 years) I have to do that now but it doesn't happen often. Biggest concern for me is that over time I become complacent with my sobriety. If I become complacent I will drink. I have no doubt about that. Stay strong. Stay diligent. Congratulations on 2 sober days.
South Asian
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 121
Seven days sober. Thankfully, been too busy to think about anything really. Still that voice occasionally in my head saying, just 3 to 5 days a month. No more. I need a new plan. Will work on it this coming weekend.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Congrats on your week Horatio 
If you've not seen this link it's a good one for making recovery plans.
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
If I might tho - just a little advice - don't wait til the weekend - that's like preparing for the cyclone when it's already here.
just give it some thought before Friday hits you
D
If you've not seen this link it's a good one for making recovery plans.
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
If I might tho - just a little advice - don't wait til the weekend - that's like preparing for the cyclone when it's already here.
just give it some thought before Friday hits you
D
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