It's my party...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Missoula, Montana
Posts: 164
It's my party...
.... and I'll have a good time if I want!
Hello! It is my birthday, today. And while I know I am very ne to sobriety (a big whopping ten days) I am just so happy.
I wish I had stopped drinking sooner. I would have left my marriage faster, I think. Instead, I drank to mask my nerves and my frustration and my fear. I left. I drank some more. And then I thought, what is my life going to be like in five years? More of the same? Awesome. (Not)
I read everything you all said. And I mimicked it. And tailored it for me. And for the first time in years, I am not scared. I am not nervous. I relish my time alone and am excited about what I can do to fill the time once spent drinking.
I refuse to become complacent and see, from all of your advice, that is when you are most at risk. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I don't miss drinking. I don't throwing up. I don't miss being sick the next day. And I don't miss being an idiot.
Thank you.
Hello! It is my birthday, today. And while I know I am very ne to sobriety (a big whopping ten days) I am just so happy.
I wish I had stopped drinking sooner. I would have left my marriage faster, I think. Instead, I drank to mask my nerves and my frustration and my fear. I left. I drank some more. And then I thought, what is my life going to be like in five years? More of the same? Awesome. (Not)
I read everything you all said. And I mimicked it. And tailored it for me. And for the first time in years, I am not scared. I am not nervous. I relish my time alone and am excited about what I can do to fill the time once spent drinking.
I refuse to become complacent and see, from all of your advice, that is when you are most at risk. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I don't miss drinking. I don't throwing up. I don't miss being sick the next day. And I don't miss being an idiot.
Thank you.
& congrats!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Missoula, Montana
Posts: 164
I'm going to have dinner with my daughter. Then I am going to finish reading a book, go to bed early so I can go get my dog and take her for a walk. I like having everything planned out - or at least pushing myself to do more than I used to. It's the sitting and spinning my thumbs that leads to self pity, self loathing and drinking. Pretty tough to hate yourself when you are helping someone, or sweating, or reading...
Coming here is the best birthday present ever. I look back on the last 25 years. Two years ago, when I turned 50, my husband got mad at me for some unknown reason and refused to even acknowledge my existence. If I were with him right now, I would be nervous, wondering when the Dr. Jekyll would come out. And I would likely drink to cope.
But thank to the best birthday present ever (coming here and seeing kind people who struggle to be better) I don't have to worry whether he is happy. I wish him peace - just not on my dime.
And thank you, thank you to all of you. Just coming here and reading your words makes me stronger and more determined to have a good, alcohol free life.
Coming here is the best birthday present ever. I look back on the last 25 years. Two years ago, when I turned 50, my husband got mad at me for some unknown reason and refused to even acknowledge my existence. If I were with him right now, I would be nervous, wondering when the Dr. Jekyll would come out. And I would likely drink to cope.
But thank to the best birthday present ever (coming here and seeing kind people who struggle to be better) I don't have to worry whether he is happy. I wish him peace - just not on my dime.
And thank you, thank you to all of you. Just coming here and reading your words makes me stronger and more determined to have a good, alcohol free life.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
Happy Birthday, ckoures!
I'm almost 50 and wish I had stopped drinking sooner too, but it is what it is. We can use our experiences to help others now, which is wonderful. I'm so happy for you. You sound free and so much lighter than when you first arrived at SR's door. Isn't it amazing the difference camaraderie, understanding and compassion make? What a beautiful world!
Have a great day
I'm almost 50 and wish I had stopped drinking sooner too, but it is what it is. We can use our experiences to help others now, which is wonderful. I'm so happy for you. You sound free and so much lighter than when you first arrived at SR's door. Isn't it amazing the difference camaraderie, understanding and compassion make? What a beautiful world!
Have a great day
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