Lola23

This seems to be a common frustration around here.

least

I hope you keep coming here for support no matter what he thinks or says. You know what you need.

DrunkenDonuts

Tell him you've joined a cult.

One where people are forbidden to drink alcohol and its adherents are sober 24 hours a day.

Tell him that cult members never get put into jail for dui or wake up hung over.

Tell him that people in this cult don't call friends and family rambling nonsense and upsetting them.

Tell him that cult is called normalcy.

Alynn

Maybe he just doesn't get it.. But you do and that's what's important .

Debbie329

There is more positive energy on this site than anywhere else I've looked. If it wasn't for this site I know I would have drank by now. Thank you to all the members and the people that make this possible. It's a real oasis.

CaseyW

Glad you're sticking with us, Cursed00.

Goodstart

Ahhh after 20 days of bliss I am back to day 1

I need to plan better for long week ends

Goodstart

Friends
With your permission I will post on this thread everyday as accountability ..... I want to change my user name when I am 30 days sober !!! Today is again day 1

CaseyW

You don't need our permission but I think it's a good idea. Accountability is a great tool for lasting sobriety. I've also found that getting active on other people's threads/monthly class/weekend/24 hour/gratitude threads is a good way to flex my own sober brain muscles and to build sober connections.

Wishing you the best today, Cursed00.

Goodstart

For me accountability to others has always worked ... Now I owe it to myself angel my lovely friends here that I remain sober ....

aasharon90

My husband of 25 yrs gave me an
ultimatum when I returned from
a 28 rehab stay that he and his parents
set up as an intervention for me to get
help for my questionable state of mind
24 yrs ago that if I drank again then I would
be out of the house.

I first of all don't like to be TOLD what
to do, so I armed myself with my program
of recovery that was taught to me while in
rehab. I armed myself with knowledge and
a Faith that would and could help me remain
sober under all kinds of circumstances.

Especially my marriage. The more meetings
I went to and the stronger more healthier I
got, my marriage began to fail slowly but surely.

We lacked communication and understanding
because I had a program of recovery as my own
guideline to help me remain sober and my husband
and family were left wondering what was going
on with the family unit.

When one in the family is sick with an
addiction, it affects everyone involved.
The only way to stay connected, healthy
and strong together would mean as it was
suggested to me was that we all needed
to be involved in some sort of recovery
plan so that we could understand each
other and all the changes that would
happen within our lives.

Sad to say, but my 25 yr marriage ended
because family saw no need for help for
themselves as they were not the ones with
an addiction problem. So they carried on
with life not skipping a beat while I continued
on in my own recovery journey and life.

Today I am remarried, healthy, happy,
honest and most of all, 24 yrs sober.

I firmly believe that there would have
been no way I could have remained in
that first marriage without moral support
and understanding from my spouse and
family.

For me, I needed and wanted to remain
sober no matter what and didn't need an
ultimatum. Living a recovery life that provides
me with the gift of the Promises as stated
in the Big Book of AA is worth more to me
than that ultimatum presented to me yrs ago.

Dee74

Welcome back Cursed...apart from posting here, do you have a recovery plan?

D

Goodstart

30 day journey


I want to change ".........I want to change my username too! This is my x30 day journey

Berrybean

I don't understand? What does this involve? Is this the name of your plan (of how you intend to get 30 days sober), or your aim (to get 30 days sober?)

What are you planning on changing about your day-to-day life to make that 30 days sober likely to happen? (Nothing changes is nothing changes you know. Definition of Insanity : Repeating the same actions and expecting different results)

Also - what happens after 30 days? You change your use name? Why not allow yourself a more positive username now if you want one?

MelindaFlowers

I didn't need anybody's confirmation to know that I was drinking myself to death. The doctor's confirmation helped though. Husband? Bah! He'll probably like the sober you much better but I do think it can worry the spouse when a destructive drinker stops drinking and starts gaining confidence and some control of their lives. They were used to us being the go-to one to blame things on. In many cases I think the non-alcoholic spouse may feel a bit superior or like the dynamic of being the one in control.

ACT10Npack

Sorry but I'm a little late to the game. Trying to caught up. Are you having a sit down talk with your husband or just a pass by talk because a he saw you on here?your sobriety is yours but you may need to have a heart to heart talk about this. I would guess he does have some types of right to understand your situation and to keep the marriage help you both got to understand where both are coming from.

Nonsensical

I did a lot of 30-day sobriety challenges on my path to a sober life. If yours is going to work, don't do them like I did them. Of the (rough estimate)10% that I actually completed day 31 was a blow out drunk. My motivation was to get to that finish line and drink again.

In retrospect, if my motivation had been to use that time to learn how to live sober I would have been much better off.

All sober time is good time for those of us with an unnatural appetite for alcohol. 30 days would be a dang fine start. Use those 30 days more wisely than I did.

Best of Luck on Your Journey.

Goodstart

Day1 .... Hangover is terrible.... I want to "pen" it here so I see it the next time I feel like drinking. I am exhausted today , anxiety is driving me crazy. Headache and tremor hmmm not a good feeling at all. Thoughts are broken. I will do it this time though!

MelindaFlowers

If someone asked me in one word why I stopped drinking alcohol? Easy.

hangovers

They were terror on my life. I stopped drinking alcohol so I never have to go through a hangover again, you'll be glad you stopped too.

Latte

My Exhusband felt that way also. This was in 2005. By 2013 he realized that it was horrible and that I really needed more help than he ever thought.

I got the bare minimum help for years and finally got the help I needed but I also gave up my children and marriage.

This doesn't have to be you-encourage your husband to go to Al Anon. ExH finally did and we are both getting healthier now-but our marriage is over.