ReadyOrNot123

Europe, very cool! How long are you going for? I've always wanted to go to France, some day I will.

Work was fine today, nowhere near as bad as I feared. It's a tough week though, and I have a lot to do. I'll just keep grinding away and it will be over soon. So yes, I was definitely being overly dramatic on Friday - and definitely it was better going through it while sharp vs. hungover and draggy/miserable.

I'm just home now, and will watch a little of this home run derby, although Berman drives me absolutely nuts.

Enjoy the pleasant evening!

nymets86

I'll be there for two weeks. Not sure what my internet connection will be, so don't worry if I disappear for awhile! I'll be back in early August. Not going to France on this trip, but have been to France before. Just did Paris and Normandy (I'm a history nerd), but next time would love to go to Nice and then over to Monoco.

Glad to hear that your day at work wasn't as bad as feared.

And I watched the whole home run derby last night. Berman is a bit annoying, but it's his thing I guess and I'm used to it. This new format is awesome. I like how it introduced a buzzer beater to baseball.

I went to the Home Run Derby in 2013 when the Mets hosted the All-Star festivities and the Home Run Derby was pretty boring to watch since the guys took like 75% of the pitches and the only Met in it got eliminated in the first round.

This week is feeling up for me and the funk of last week has subsided for the most part. It's good to know that I can get through something like that when sober. And in hindsight, it's now obvious that the blues went away faster because I wasn't drinking and piling on to the stress/depression.

Hope everyone is well. Torn/60, I hope you guys are hanging in there

nymets86

Ugh. I typed that message earlier today.

Here I am, after a night of drinking, watching the All-StarGame.

Tomorrow will be my new Day 1.

I have sober plans for this weekend and then for my whole Europe trip. I'm just so mad at myself for drinking tonight.

Trees39

Mets, great that you are back though.. Right?

Onwards and upwards.

Dee74

the trouble is, in the absence of a plan, drinking can easily become the default again.

I really think some time thinking about a plan would be beneficial to you Mets?

D

nymets86

Thanks trees.

You are correct Dee. As soon as I heard about the work happy hour, my plan failed. I was in a very good mood, and drank. I should have just left and gone home. I'm not 100% sure what switched in my brain, but it likely started by not pouring out the booze my friend had bought me as a thank you for letting me use my apartment while he was visiting New York.

It's all poured out now, but after drinking a lot of beer at the work happy hour, I drank a lot of the vodka. The physical symptoms of the hangover are wearing off, but I feel horrible mentally.

I need to really focus today and amend my game plan with respects to unexpected invitations to drink. Those will come again. Someone leaving me alcohol as a gift again isn't too likely, but yeah, I need to pour it out as soon as practicable in the future and not hang on to it.

Well, Day 1 underway. I'm very happy to say that I had drank just two days in the last 146 days. Zero of the last 146 would be a heck of a lot better, but I'm giving myself some credit for just the 2 episodes of drinking over a long stretch of time. I know beating myself up won't be too constructive, but failing to acknowledge would be worse.

Have a nice day everyone

ReadyOrNot123

Mets, I'm sorry about your lapse, and I agree, it's good to acknowledge it. Wow, that came out of the blue, and is a good reminder to the rest of us to be cautious and vigilant. As Trees says, onward and upward. Is there anything we can do to help with the plan?

nymets86

Thanks ready. I'm gonna stick close to here until I leave for Europe.

My sober plan for the trip is very well thought out. My family has definitely noticed that I'm not drinking. So while maybe a cousin or aunt or someone will offer, I don't really see it being an issue. I'm just going to say I am dieting. I am down two belt loops, so it's noticeable, eventhough he weight loss has really slowed. If the timing makes sense, I'll let my family know I am trying to quit, but I've been unable to get up the courage to say that and I don't want t add that stress to things.

I actually feel very good right now, which in a sense is concerning me since I drank and ruined what had been my longest sober run since 2007. Just because last night didn't involve a blackout while out with people doesn't mean it was an "OK" night. I know I felt like garbage this morning, so I'm just trying to remember that, but yeah, onward and upward. Last night is going to just be last night. Not s pattern of drinking.

nymets86

Thanks ready. I'm gonna stick close to here until I leave for Europe.

My sober plan for the trip is very well thought out. My family has definitely noticed that I'm not drinking. So while maybe a cousin or aunt or someone will offer, I don't really see it being an issue. I'm just going to say I am dieting. I am down two belt loops, so it's noticeable, eventhough he weight loss has really slowed. If the timing makes sense, I'll let my family know I am trying to quit, but I've been unable to get up the courage to say that and I don't want t add that stress to things.

I actually feel very good right now, which in a sense is concerning me since I drank and ruined what had been my longest sober run since 2007. Just because last night didn't involve a blackout while out with people doesn't mean it was an "OK" night. I know I felt like garbage this morning, so I'm just trying to remember that, but yeah, onward and upward. Last night is going to just be last night. Not s pattern of drinking.

ReadyOrNot123

How are you feeling tonight Mets? I think telling your family is a good idea.

All is OK here, I'm kind of stressed out about all the work I need to do - next week is a big meeting that a lot of work is going into and I'm very ready for it to be over. I am very interested to see how this anxiety medication works. My doctor said it would take about 30 days to become effective, and this meeting Monday is almost exactly 30 days, and it's the type of meeting that would definitely trigger my anxiety. I have another one that usually kicks my butt on Wednesday. So I'm hopeful that I will see some improvement.

Trees, good to see you pop in - hope you are doing well.

nymets86

I'm feeling fine tonight. Was thinking of going to the gym to workout and just try to put tomorrow even more behind me, but just going to go easy. The physical hangover wasn't very bad this morning, but I think that's in part because I've been getting so much healthier by not drinking that I recovered faster. I have a big sense of relief that nothing worse happened, but also a sense that it was just dumb luck that it didn't end poorly. I know for me drinking is like playing with fire.

Hopefully the anxiety meds kick in and are effective. It sounds like you are well prepared, so that I think will help as well. I'd also suggest that once you have prepared the appropriate amount, find something else to do like joke around with coworkers or watch something on YouTube (if it's not blocked at your office). I find that going over and over a presentation beforehand just ramps up the anxiety. Obviously no preparation is bad, but for me, over preparing makes me just get more and more anxious and I think that causes me to underperform.

ReadyOrNot123

Thanks Mets, you're right. I've done it all - over prepared, under prepared and, far less often - prepared just right. My most important role in this two day shindig is to play traffic cop, get people from A to B, make sure the discussions flow, document everything, etc. etc. And hold my temper - there are two women in this group who are just vile. I swing wildly from amusement that people can be so rude, and white hot rage that people can be so rude! Anyway, I'm looking forward to it being over.

Glad to hear you bounced back. In the end, the physical isn't the problem, it's the mental. But you're still doing great, you did so after the last slip, so keep it up.

nymets86

Up bright and early and feeling OK. A bit more bummed now about the slip than I was yesterday since yesterday I think the feeling of relief that it wasn't worse overrode it. Now I'm disappointed I'm back on Day 2 and questioning my ability to stay sober forever. Despite not ditching the booze as soon as possible, it still did kind of sneak up on me. It wasn't like I had a craving when I drank. I just sort of got carried away in the moment.

Long day of work today, which is good, since it involves traveling to Harrisburg, PA, which is about a 3-hour drive. I won't be home until late, so just a full day, which I am happy to have right now as I won't have the possibility of idle time. Certainly a contributing factor to my slip was that I had nothing planned for Tuesday evening and so when the happy hour popped up, going didn't seem so bad. Similarly, I knew that I had nothing important at work on Wednesday and so I couldn't talk myself out of it due to that. Tomorrow morning I also have an early meeting, basically to debrief my boss about the sales meetings I have set up in Pennsylania today.

Good morning everyone

Dee74

Time for a new thread guys:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-4-a.html

D