onceuponatime2

Thanks everyone, and happy birthday to those with a birthday this weekend too. I like your analogy ladyscribbler about the master of the phantom arguement. Yea, that is spot on. I appreciate the thoughts from everyone. You made my weekend better. Now off to celebrate despite Captain Chaos.

healthyagain

I call it "the skunk syndrome." They spray you with stinky stuff to defend themselves. My AH has always been a party pooper.

Happy B-day! You can still enjoy your time without him.

cookiesncream

Hope you're surviving and enjoying your day. Alcohol is the "low hanging fruit" but really its the person and the personality that is the issue, alcohol merely exacerbates it. They say that one stops maturing during active addiction and this I believe to be true. The longer one is addicted the longer it will take to gain the emotional maturity lost during that time. You are right as a lot we are one selfish bunch. That said, maybe it was because I'm an old fart who didn't face addiction until mid life, but I did find all the whining and blaming just annoying as hades in my stint in outpatient rehab.

That said I really wish (I know be careful what you wish for) that I could blame alcohol for narcissistic, passive aggressive, attention seeking, victim mentalities I see in those close to me. It would be an easy thing to blame. Alas I can't blame alcohol but merely the person in at least one case (my Mother). I spent the day with her where it was theoretically about me but I listened to an endless list of complaints: had to go to three different restaurants because there was something wrong with each one. Mom is making me something of which I am paying for the materials and she found fault with everything I picked out. The GPS voice guidance wasn't loud enough. She'd periodically then say "oh but this is about you." I toughed it out but honestly if I was still drinking a day of this kind of behavior a bottle of wine would be calling my name. I guess maybe I'm not recovered enough and this is why I'm annoyed.

Oh geesh here I am playing alcoholic and turning this into me again-old habits die hard:-( Okay me in recovery mode (you can teach old dogs new tricks promise, we CAN learn)... I do hope you had a wonderful birthday. Happy March 7th birthdays to we Pisces:-)

peace