Fear of Failure! Fear of Relapse!
Fear of Failure! Fear of Relapse!
Good Day Everyone,
I went to 2 meetings today but I have a Question for the SR Community.
Must all us Alcoholics, live in Fear of the next Relapse for the rest of our lives.
I am just struggling accepting this because of the events that occurred to me last week.
I feel so afraid. Is it something I just have to accept even though everyone keeps saying you never have to feel like that again.
Thank you for everything SR and the good people here.
I went to 2 meetings today but I have a Question for the SR Community.
Must all us Alcoholics, live in Fear of the next Relapse for the rest of our lives.
I am just struggling accepting this because of the events that occurred to me last week.
I feel so afraid. Is it something I just have to accept even though everyone keeps saying you never have to feel like that again.
Thank you for everything SR and the good people here.
hi MS
I think fear is pretty common in the early days but you'll soon learn that if you want to stay sober, there's no power on earth that can compel you to take that next drink if you don't want to
It may be a little hard to believe that right now, but give yourself a little time - your belief in yourself will grow I promise.
D
I think fear is pretty common in the early days but you'll soon learn that if you want to stay sober, there's no power on earth that can compel you to take that next drink if you don't want to
It may be a little hard to believe that right now, but give yourself a little time - your belief in yourself will grow I promise.
D
hi MS
I think fear is pretty common in the early days but you'll soon learn that if you want to stay sober, there's no power on earth that can compel you to take that next drink if you don't want to
It may be a little hard to believe that right now, but give yourself a little time - your belief in yourself will grow I promise.
D
I think fear is pretty common in the early days but you'll soon learn that if you want to stay sober, there's no power on earth that can compel you to take that next drink if you don't want to
It may be a little hard to believe that right now, but give yourself a little time - your belief in yourself will grow I promise.
D
I havnt relapsed since i got sober this is the first time ive ever got to a month sober and here i am at 17 months
I too was seriously scared ppl were dropping like flies around me and i put it to this forum
The best reply i got by far and its gonna stay with me was
Relapse is part of my addiction Relapse is not part of my recovery
For me that was astounding made a ton of sense in any way you look at that sentence
what i took from it was that im in recovery & relapse simply isnt part of that
I cant tell you how much that calmed me down
Relapse is never inevitable
I too was seriously scared ppl were dropping like flies around me and i put it to this forum
The best reply i got by far and its gonna stay with me was
Relapse is part of my addiction Relapse is not part of my recovery
For me that was astounding made a ton of sense in any way you look at that sentence
what i took from it was that im in recovery & relapse simply isnt part of that
I cant tell you how much that calmed me down
Relapse is never inevitable
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kFnFr-DOPf8
Ms-I think it's natural to fear relapsing when first starting out since you're venturing into new territory.
Have you made any plans as to what you're going to do when you have cravings? If you haven't, start making plans now (go on a walk, go to the movie, etc).
As everyone has mentioned, it does get easier the more sober time you get.
Have you made any plans as to what you're going to do when you have cravings? If you haven't, start making plans now (go on a walk, go to the movie, etc).
As everyone has mentioned, it does get easier the more sober time you get.
I'll be very honest and say that the "fear" is definitely there. I've actually thought forward a year, two, etc and I get this sinking feeling in my gut. Am I gonna do it again in a couple weeks? Can I really do this? How can I live the life I want when I see it all over TV, internet, stores, hell I can't even watch a football game without seeing beer commercials. And truthfully, what those guys with the snacks and the beer, watching the game and cheering looks fun. But I know I can't do that anymore and I just have to accept that.
My ma, who's been through a lot in the last few years, told me the other day, "Sweetie, just take it one day at a time. If you fall, you pick yourself up and keep moving forward." I believe I'm in the right mindset, and I have to just take it one day at a time and not think about the future when it comes to my addiction. Goals, aspirations, positive things yes, but not my alcoholism. As patman said above, vigilance and focus on the positives of recovery, not the negatives is what I believe is important.
I really don't know if this is the right way to look at it, but I feel right now that it is the way for me.
My ma, who's been through a lot in the last few years, told me the other day, "Sweetie, just take it one day at a time. If you fall, you pick yourself up and keep moving forward." I believe I'm in the right mindset, and I have to just take it one day at a time and not think about the future when it comes to my addiction. Goals, aspirations, positive things yes, but not my alcoholism. As patman said above, vigilance and focus on the positives of recovery, not the negatives is what I believe is important.
I really don't know if this is the right way to look at it, but I feel right now that it is the way for me.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
I'm with LBrain and SWolfy. Relapse is not inevitable, and it's not mandatory. This is my first try and I'm serious. I know that I'm never drinking today, or again. I do say never and I believe it in my heart. At times it's hard but then is when you use all the tools that you have learned here. You have to be proactive you can't just expect things to happen and fall on your lap, you have to do the work. The plan can vary, it just has to be whatever works for you.
Don't be fearful or intimidated. It will bring you down or set you up for disaster.
Don't be fearful or intimidated. It will bring you down or set you up for disaster.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Just want to say that I relate to your fear. I am only 12 days in after a relapse (after 5 & 1/2 years of sobriety). Sometimes I feel like I am gonna get "struck drunk". Like a lightning bolt is gonna come out of the sky and hit me and I am gonna be drunk or someone has a voo-dew doll...
Anyway...why did I drink again after 5 & 1/2 years??? (and I really believed I would NEVER drink again). I forgot what I was. I forgot that I was an alcoholic. I stopped logging on to SR. I stopped going to AA. I stopped doing ANYTHING recovery-wise. I thought I was cured.
I will never make that mistake again! So..if you never forget that you are an alcoholic and keep doing what you are doing now to stay sober...you will be fine. We have really good "forgetters". At least I do.
You'll be ok. Just keep telling on your disease. The more time you get...the less fear you will have as long as you stay in the middle of the pack.
When animals are migrating...the animals in the MIDDLE of the pack (i.e. AA/SR/recovery) are the safest. It's the animals on the outside edges of the pack that get picked off by prey (i.e. our disease/relapse/AV).
Stay in the MIDDLE OF THE PACK!
Anyway...why did I drink again after 5 & 1/2 years??? (and I really believed I would NEVER drink again). I forgot what I was. I forgot that I was an alcoholic. I stopped logging on to SR. I stopped going to AA. I stopped doing ANYTHING recovery-wise. I thought I was cured.
I will never make that mistake again! So..if you never forget that you are an alcoholic and keep doing what you are doing now to stay sober...you will be fine. We have really good "forgetters". At least I do.
You'll be ok. Just keep telling on your disease. The more time you get...the less fear you will have as long as you stay in the middle of the pack.
When animals are migrating...the animals in the MIDDLE of the pack (i.e. AA/SR/recovery) are the safest. It's the animals on the outside edges of the pack that get picked off by prey (i.e. our disease/relapse/AV).
Stay in the MIDDLE OF THE PACK!
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