CodeJob

This is a very thorough introduction to drama triangles in families. You are being pulled to behave in certain ways to allow both of your parents to enforce their beliefs about their relationship.

The Drama Triangle: The Three Roles of Victimhood - article by Dr. Lynne Namka

NWGRITS

You have an A dad and a codependent mother who's putting the burden of her decision and his reaction on your shoulders. Yep, I know that one well. You are not responsible for them or their decisions. I hate when people ask the kids, as though the kids are certified experts in marriage counseling and have any clue what's best for their parents. Younger children don't know what's best for them, and older children know that the whole family is screwed up, so it doesn't much matter. They usually answer based on what won't get them yelled at. You work on you and try to avoid engaging in the drama triangle. Yes, they are very sick, but they still have make their own choices. Likewise, so do you.

Timetoheal12

This is exactly what I thought. She knows that the decision is only up to her, but she wants to know if I will be OK with it.

Timetoheal12

I talked to my mom again. I explained to her that if she ever chooses to divorce my dad, I’ll be there for her. But that as long as this doesn’t happens, I’ll be attending both therapy and Alanon by myself. She confessed me that she’s been going to a therapist who is well practiced in addiction and co-dependence for a long time now, and that she will have to think a bit more about divorce.
She and my dad haven’t talked to each other on these days…. Since the holidays are coming I feel a bit anxious, but I’ll try my best to enjoy the time.


Also… My ex has been trying to contact me, I haven’t responded. But I got curious about what he’s been up to, so I saw his recent post on a website he has. He has been drinking, and has a new interest: PRACTITIONERS OF THE LEFT HAND PATH


I don’t want to be judgmental and I definitely don’t know that much about it, but it kind of freaked me out.... So I’ll stay away.


Thanks for all so far.

ladyscribbler

Weird. I had no idea Satan was so into pop up ads. I guess I should have figured.

F50Lurker

Wow. Sounds like virtually every night of my childhood. Shudder......