It's all about me Part 5
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Charlie, I'm really sorry H left for the night. My 1st husband used to do that all the time & it always made me feel so hopeless. Like he had all the power & I was just left there to steam over it. What did he have to say for himself today?
Blue, it sounds like you & Mr Blue have been having a good time together. Just an idea about the mix of woods in your cottage...you could always paint everything the same color. There are new paints out there called chalk paint & come in a slew of different colors & are easy to distess. Painted furniture looks great in a cottage.
Tod, your delivery must have been quite surprised w/the greeting y'all gave him lol. Is Jethro making his script last all mo or does he run out early?
Clean, I really think you need to see your doc. Have you had anymore fevers?
The 10 o'clock news just did a story on the widespread abuse of prescription drugs & heroin, also covering 2 young people in their early 20's who've died this past yr. One was a Mi state police officer's son & the other was a beautiful 21yr old woman who died from a heroin overdose. So very sad. But it was a good story, stating that communities need to start taking these addictions more seriously & compassionately. I personally think it's becoming an epidemic among our young people. I also think that due to the fact that our young are dying ( w/parents from all walks of life ) that more & more communities are taking notice & are starting to become proactive towards addiction. I truly believe that once people realize that drug addicts ( especially heroin ) are not all lowlifes, living on the street & that addiction doesn't discriminate, maybe the negative stigma surrounding addicts will dissipate somewhat.
Blue, it sounds like you & Mr Blue have been having a good time together. Just an idea about the mix of woods in your cottage...you could always paint everything the same color. There are new paints out there called chalk paint & come in a slew of different colors & are easy to distess. Painted furniture looks great in a cottage.
Tod, your delivery must have been quite surprised w/the greeting y'all gave him lol. Is Jethro making his script last all mo or does he run out early?
Clean, I really think you need to see your doc. Have you had anymore fevers?
The 10 o'clock news just did a story on the widespread abuse of prescription drugs & heroin, also covering 2 young people in their early 20's who've died this past yr. One was a Mi state police officer's son & the other was a beautiful 21yr old woman who died from a heroin overdose. So very sad. But it was a good story, stating that communities need to start taking these addictions more seriously & compassionately. I personally think it's becoming an epidemic among our young people. I also think that due to the fact that our young are dying ( w/parents from all walks of life ) that more & more communities are taking notice & are starting to become proactive towards addiction. I truly believe that once people realize that drug addicts ( especially heroin ) are not all lowlifes, living on the street & that addiction doesn't discriminate, maybe the negative stigma surrounding addicts will dissipate somewhat.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,927
Cleanin - Im worried about you. I will try to get hold of you tomorrow during the day. I know don't hold your breath or you might add one more problem to the list.. LOL .. 
Only stopping by for a minute.. good stuff you just posted KZ... Im sorry those deaths occurred, but I hope that something positive can come from the losses - a lesson of sorts for some people.. maybe they can make a difference at least in the lives of their own family members by awareness, education, and action.
Buttercup - now we need to hear from you.. and our chat group will be complete.
Only stopping by for a minute.. good stuff you just posted KZ... Im sorry those deaths occurred, but I hope that something positive can come from the losses - a lesson of sorts for some people.. maybe they can make a difference at least in the lives of their own family members by awareness, education, and action.
Buttercup - now we need to hear from you.. and our chat group will be complete.
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Hello everybody!
Kz: Yes we had a wonderful time with the family at the lake. I wish the picture of the moon on the lake would have came out as clear as it looked in person! But y’all got the jest of what I was seeing anyway!
…..When I was around 15? I, my older sister and our two guys we were with were swimming in a creek close to home! My older sister was the last to get out of the creek. The three of us were standing on the bank drying off when I spotted something long and large swimming towards my sister! We started waving to her to get out of the water! She thought we were just waving for the hell of it because she was still swimming and would wave back at us! We then started screaming and pointing behind her. Finally she turns and see’s what’s coming at her. She couldn’t get out of that water FAST enough! The two guys jumped in to help her out and then they went on the kill. After a long time of fighting this Gar? They got it on the bank. It was longer than I am tall and I’m 5’7! I’ve seen lots of Gars in the waterways I’ve been in and around here in AR!
…..My sister’s BF actually caught a Carp Friday night not long after the catfish!
…..Jethro and I had actually discussed taking Maria with us Saturday night! LOL I talked him out of it though! One or the other would have to be constantly holding her while there.
Charley: I figured from your silence something happened with you and H!
…..Congrat’s on DD winning gold!
Allfor: There has been some huge catfish caught on this lake! There is a little over 18 species of fish caught out of this lake!
…..Let me try and clear up the phone confusion! The men (4 of them) were all sitting/standing on that small dock at the end of the sidewalk out over the lake! My BIL was sitting in a chair. He stood up and his phone case got caught on the chair arm! It broke and his phone went into the lake! It’s now 4ft down in the mud and water! Jethro was playing a joke by putting the phone in front of Maria and saying some joker named “Billy Bass” keeps answering the phone! A species of Bass is in the lake! A fish was answering the phone!
…..So the rummage sale turns into a sort of grab bag on the last day? Too funny!
Cleanin: Good deal on feeling better! Jethro isn’t a kid, but he’s still growing! LOL
…..How long can I laugh over your statement about Maria being curious before I have to stop? She’s a chicken! LOL And God forbid if there’s walmart sacks on the floor! She has to poke her head into each one and then scratch at it for awhile!
…..I used to be real bad about rearranging the furniture! Not anymore! I don’t have the room for it now! Plus Maria’s spot on the sheet can’t really be relocated either! And then there’s the huge entertainment center that takes up one complete wall. Then Jethro went and put a gas stove in on another wall! So forget it! Rabbits are curious! I’m sure Dova is enjoying it! But then again? Hickory sat in his pizzed off mode when I moved his crate to another spot! I finally moved it back so he’d stop being so pizzed off! LOL
…..There’s so much stuff here. I don’t want anymore! I don’t even use coupons anymore! I get a military discount most places so that always helps! I swear Jethro takes advantage of it more than I do! And he’s never been in the military!
…..We have no color blindness in my family!
HBM: Hello happybeing me!
Kz: I thought Rob was further along in his clean time? Didn’t you say he was in jail before going to GA? He would have been clean in jail too!
…..It’s a good thing he got on some good meds to help him sleep though! And he’s avoiding the dreaded RLS too!
…..I’ve collected carousel glass horses thru the years! Now I call them dust collectors! LOL
…..I do need to go to Goodwill to see if I can find some cheap blankets/comforters to replace the ones in the doghouse! Those things are getting foul smelling! There’s no way I’m putting them in my washer either!
…..A huge congrats on your clean time too!
Cleanin: Personalities in our pet chickens is an understatement! LOL
…..I don’t hold things inside my brain! I come on out with it! I’m not one to sit around and worry/wonder what’s going to happen? I try thinking in the moment or thinking ahead for things that need to be done! I don’t forecast either! That’s an invite for trouble and a headache!
Charley: I forgot to mention! In the picture of the yard? Do y’all see the wood duck box in the water? It’s got the rusting roof behind it! There is a momma wood duck sitting on eggs in it. And the barn to the left of the picture has a little bird box on it with babies in it. The parents were working up a storm bringing them bugs. They also carried the poops in the nest far off too! Little house keepers! LOL
…..Seems H leaves and Jethro gets super angry when I bring up things in reference to the pain meds! When he got home today and saw the UPS package sitting beside his laptop? He took them away quickly. I wasn’t really speaking to him and he knew I wasn’t happy about him getting them and I had to sign for them too! I mean seriously! How many recovering opiate addicts are there out there having to sign for them and live with them too? Crazy! I did have him cornered in the car on the way home Saturday night. I asked him again: “Why did you say I needed to get off of them?” He said: “It didn’t matter how many you had? You went thru them quickly!” I told him that’s an addict for ya! And then I asked him: “What was it you didn’t like about me being on them?” He was trying hard to drop the subject and kept getting really pizzed off! I asked him again! He said: “You were changing into someone else!” Ahhhhhh There’s the answer I was looking for. I said back to him: “That’s exactly why I want you off of them, because you are doing the same damned thing!” I then dropped the subject! My point was made!
…..If H has to leave? Let him leave! You won’t have to deal with him! He’s processing things thru that head of his! And he isn’t around to make life miserable for you too! He always comes back!
Blue: There isn’t one romantic bone in my body! I said that for y’all’s benefit! LOL
…..It’s about time you got your booty here! Seriously! Did the squirrels have you duck taped to the peanut barrel?
…..I’m happy to see you back and chatting with us again!
Cleanin: Do you remember tbeit? It was a woman he’s known since he was five years old that passed! He’s really broken hearted over it!
Kz: The UPS man said “I have a drake that follows me all around the yard too!” LOL He just couldn’t get over the dog’s size! And was amazed at how well Marvin stayed right with Marilyn and watched out for her!
…..Hell if I know how he uses the pain meds! I want NO part of them and don’t keep up with how he uses them! He told me this last go round when he ran out? “I haven’t put in for a refill in over two months. So this one lasted me that long!” So I set him straight on a few facts! I reminded him he had all those extra’s from two surgeries he used too! So that would have put him closer to 100 pills! So Jethro! Sit on that and rotate!
…..There are too many deaths happening from drugs/alcohol! I’ve said many a time: “Drugs and alcohol are the new flood to wipe out the population!”
TOD
Kz: Yes we had a wonderful time with the family at the lake. I wish the picture of the moon on the lake would have came out as clear as it looked in person! But y’all got the jest of what I was seeing anyway!
…..When I was around 15? I, my older sister and our two guys we were with were swimming in a creek close to home! My older sister was the last to get out of the creek. The three of us were standing on the bank drying off when I spotted something long and large swimming towards my sister! We started waving to her to get out of the water! She thought we were just waving for the hell of it because she was still swimming and would wave back at us! We then started screaming and pointing behind her. Finally she turns and see’s what’s coming at her. She couldn’t get out of that water FAST enough! The two guys jumped in to help her out and then they went on the kill. After a long time of fighting this Gar? They got it on the bank. It was longer than I am tall and I’m 5’7! I’ve seen lots of Gars in the waterways I’ve been in and around here in AR!
…..My sister’s BF actually caught a Carp Friday night not long after the catfish!
…..Jethro and I had actually discussed taking Maria with us Saturday night! LOL I talked him out of it though! One or the other would have to be constantly holding her while there.
Charley: I figured from your silence something happened with you and H!
…..Congrat’s on DD winning gold!
Allfor: There has been some huge catfish caught on this lake! There is a little over 18 species of fish caught out of this lake!
…..Let me try and clear up the phone confusion! The men (4 of them) were all sitting/standing on that small dock at the end of the sidewalk out over the lake! My BIL was sitting in a chair. He stood up and his phone case got caught on the chair arm! It broke and his phone went into the lake! It’s now 4ft down in the mud and water! Jethro was playing a joke by putting the phone in front of Maria and saying some joker named “Billy Bass” keeps answering the phone! A species of Bass is in the lake! A fish was answering the phone!
…..So the rummage sale turns into a sort of grab bag on the last day? Too funny!
Cleanin: Good deal on feeling better! Jethro isn’t a kid, but he’s still growing! LOL
…..How long can I laugh over your statement about Maria being curious before I have to stop? She’s a chicken! LOL And God forbid if there’s walmart sacks on the floor! She has to poke her head into each one and then scratch at it for awhile!
…..I used to be real bad about rearranging the furniture! Not anymore! I don’t have the room for it now! Plus Maria’s spot on the sheet can’t really be relocated either! And then there’s the huge entertainment center that takes up one complete wall. Then Jethro went and put a gas stove in on another wall! So forget it! Rabbits are curious! I’m sure Dova is enjoying it! But then again? Hickory sat in his pizzed off mode when I moved his crate to another spot! I finally moved it back so he’d stop being so pizzed off! LOL
…..There’s so much stuff here. I don’t want anymore! I don’t even use coupons anymore! I get a military discount most places so that always helps! I swear Jethro takes advantage of it more than I do! And he’s never been in the military!
…..We have no color blindness in my family!
HBM: Hello happybeing me!
Kz: I thought Rob was further along in his clean time? Didn’t you say he was in jail before going to GA? He would have been clean in jail too!
…..It’s a good thing he got on some good meds to help him sleep though! And he’s avoiding the dreaded RLS too!
…..I’ve collected carousel glass horses thru the years! Now I call them dust collectors! LOL
…..I do need to go to Goodwill to see if I can find some cheap blankets/comforters to replace the ones in the doghouse! Those things are getting foul smelling! There’s no way I’m putting them in my washer either!
…..A huge congrats on your clean time too!
Cleanin: Personalities in our pet chickens is an understatement! LOL
…..I don’t hold things inside my brain! I come on out with it! I’m not one to sit around and worry/wonder what’s going to happen? I try thinking in the moment or thinking ahead for things that need to be done! I don’t forecast either! That’s an invite for trouble and a headache!
Charley: I forgot to mention! In the picture of the yard? Do y’all see the wood duck box in the water? It’s got the rusting roof behind it! There is a momma wood duck sitting on eggs in it. And the barn to the left of the picture has a little bird box on it with babies in it. The parents were working up a storm bringing them bugs. They also carried the poops in the nest far off too! Little house keepers! LOL
…..Seems H leaves and Jethro gets super angry when I bring up things in reference to the pain meds! When he got home today and saw the UPS package sitting beside his laptop? He took them away quickly. I wasn’t really speaking to him and he knew I wasn’t happy about him getting them and I had to sign for them too! I mean seriously! How many recovering opiate addicts are there out there having to sign for them and live with them too? Crazy! I did have him cornered in the car on the way home Saturday night. I asked him again: “Why did you say I needed to get off of them?” He said: “It didn’t matter how many you had? You went thru them quickly!” I told him that’s an addict for ya! And then I asked him: “What was it you didn’t like about me being on them?” He was trying hard to drop the subject and kept getting really pizzed off! I asked him again! He said: “You were changing into someone else!” Ahhhhhh There’s the answer I was looking for. I said back to him: “That’s exactly why I want you off of them, because you are doing the same damned thing!” I then dropped the subject! My point was made!
…..If H has to leave? Let him leave! You won’t have to deal with him! He’s processing things thru that head of his! And he isn’t around to make life miserable for you too! He always comes back!
Blue: There isn’t one romantic bone in my body! I said that for y’all’s benefit! LOL
…..It’s about time you got your booty here! Seriously! Did the squirrels have you duck taped to the peanut barrel?
…..I’m happy to see you back and chatting with us again!
Cleanin: Do you remember tbeit? It was a woman he’s known since he was five years old that passed! He’s really broken hearted over it!
Kz: The UPS man said “I have a drake that follows me all around the yard too!” LOL He just couldn’t get over the dog’s size! And was amazed at how well Marvin stayed right with Marilyn and watched out for her!
…..Hell if I know how he uses the pain meds! I want NO part of them and don’t keep up with how he uses them! He told me this last go round when he ran out? “I haven’t put in for a refill in over two months. So this one lasted me that long!” So I set him straight on a few facts! I reminded him he had all those extra’s from two surgeries he used too! So that would have put him closer to 100 pills! So Jethro! Sit on that and rotate!
…..There are too many deaths happening from drugs/alcohol! I’ve said many a time: “Drugs and alcohol are the new flood to wipe out the population!”
TOD
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,854
Im sorry for your loss Tbeit.
Happy Hump Day! WEDNESDAY people!
Thanks for the tip Kz. I think a trip to the home store where they have all the paint samples is in order. I will look up chalk paint while Im there. I keep reminding myself I can experiment and if I dont like something then I can replace it. I need to make it a fun project.
I didnt know what a Gar fish was so I had to look it up. Did they migrate here? This is what it looks like. I found something else interesting, you may all know this but I wasnt sure what a crawfish was either.
This is from a site called the DiffernceBetween, and written by Abishek:
Crawfish vs Lobster
Crawfish or crayfish are basically crustaceans commonly found in freshwater. These usually look like small lobsters and are organically related to them as well, whereas lobsters are essentially crustaceans infesting marine water. Crawfish, crawdads or crayfish compose of the super families of Parastacoidea and Astacoidea. On the other hand clawed lobsters fall within the family of Nephropidae or Homaridae at times.
The body of a crawfish, which is a decapod crustacean, comprises of as many as nineteen distinctive body parts that are collectively combined into two primary body parts. These two are the cephalothorax followed by the abdomen. Furthermore, each of the body segments has two appendages. In general an average crayfish grows up to 17.5 centimeters in length. Lobsters are essentially invertebrates, having a hard shielding exoskeleton. Lobsters like all other major arthropods need to molt in order to grow. While molting they experience color changes. The periods of growth are rather vulnerable for the lobsters. The name clawed lobsters comes from the fact that lobsters have 10 legs of which the front ones are adapted to work like claws.
Crayfish generally feeds on both living and dead plants and animals. On the other hand, lobsters eat live food which may include mollusks, other crustaceans, fish, worms and some plant life as well. But lobsters, unlike crayfish, at times also resort to cannibalism under extreme conditions and eat their own flesh after molting.
Crayfish exist in diverse colors. Some may have a single color while others may show a variety of colors. A blue crayfish may have pink dots or lining along the shell. They are also found in other colors like brown, black, red, pink, gray, blue and purple. Lobsters on the other hand are generally blue or copper in color because of the presence of blue blood containing copper and haemocyanin.
Both the Crayfish and Lobster trace a long history, but characteristically quite different from each other. Talking of Crayfish, the people of the Moche ethnic group of ancient Peru used to worship animals which often depicted the common crayfish, which can also commonly be found in their art. The earliest fossil records of crayfish that were ever found were traced in Australia, as many as 115 million years back. Nonetheless, the common European lobster found in the wild and the royal blue lobsters of Audresselles were traditionally relished by the aristocratic families and royal families of Netherlands and France. Often scenes of men fishing lobsters can be found portrayed in certain Dutch paintings of the 16th and 17th centuries.
Summary:
1. Crawfish are freshwater crustaceans while lobsters are marine crustaceans.
2. Lobsters are cannibalistic under pressure and eat their own skin while molting, whereas crawfish show no such habits.
3. Crawfish eats dead animals and plants while lobster eats live plants and animals.
4. Crayfish were traditionally eaten in parts of South America, Peru and Australia whereas Lobsters were more common in the European continent particularly favored in France and Netherlands.
5. Crawfish belong to the super family of Parastacoidea and Astacoidea while lobsters belong to the family to Nephropidae or Homaridae.
But comments say crawfish are cannibals too. These dont sound too yummy to eat and dont think I will be cooking any soon.
Peanut fumes may get me soon Tod! Gotta have more delivered before the weekend.
Happy Hump Day! WEDNESDAY people!
Thanks for the tip Kz. I think a trip to the home store where they have all the paint samples is in order. I will look up chalk paint while Im there. I keep reminding myself I can experiment and if I dont like something then I can replace it. I need to make it a fun project.
I didnt know what a Gar fish was so I had to look it up. Did they migrate here? This is what it looks like. I found something else interesting, you may all know this but I wasnt sure what a crawfish was either.
This is from a site called the DiffernceBetween, and written by Abishek:
Crawfish vs Lobster
Crawfish or crayfish are basically crustaceans commonly found in freshwater. These usually look like small lobsters and are organically related to them as well, whereas lobsters are essentially crustaceans infesting marine water. Crawfish, crawdads or crayfish compose of the super families of Parastacoidea and Astacoidea. On the other hand clawed lobsters fall within the family of Nephropidae or Homaridae at times.
The body of a crawfish, which is a decapod crustacean, comprises of as many as nineteen distinctive body parts that are collectively combined into two primary body parts. These two are the cephalothorax followed by the abdomen. Furthermore, each of the body segments has two appendages. In general an average crayfish grows up to 17.5 centimeters in length. Lobsters are essentially invertebrates, having a hard shielding exoskeleton. Lobsters like all other major arthropods need to molt in order to grow. While molting they experience color changes. The periods of growth are rather vulnerable for the lobsters. The name clawed lobsters comes from the fact that lobsters have 10 legs of which the front ones are adapted to work like claws.
Crayfish generally feeds on both living and dead plants and animals. On the other hand, lobsters eat live food which may include mollusks, other crustaceans, fish, worms and some plant life as well. But lobsters, unlike crayfish, at times also resort to cannibalism under extreme conditions and eat their own flesh after molting.
Crayfish exist in diverse colors. Some may have a single color while others may show a variety of colors. A blue crayfish may have pink dots or lining along the shell. They are also found in other colors like brown, black, red, pink, gray, blue and purple. Lobsters on the other hand are generally blue or copper in color because of the presence of blue blood containing copper and haemocyanin.
Both the Crayfish and Lobster trace a long history, but characteristically quite different from each other. Talking of Crayfish, the people of the Moche ethnic group of ancient Peru used to worship animals which often depicted the common crayfish, which can also commonly be found in their art. The earliest fossil records of crayfish that were ever found were traced in Australia, as many as 115 million years back. Nonetheless, the common European lobster found in the wild and the royal blue lobsters of Audresselles were traditionally relished by the aristocratic families and royal families of Netherlands and France. Often scenes of men fishing lobsters can be found portrayed in certain Dutch paintings of the 16th and 17th centuries.
Summary:
1. Crawfish are freshwater crustaceans while lobsters are marine crustaceans.
2. Lobsters are cannibalistic under pressure and eat their own skin while molting, whereas crawfish show no such habits.
3. Crawfish eats dead animals and plants while lobster eats live plants and animals.
4. Crayfish were traditionally eaten in parts of South America, Peru and Australia whereas Lobsters were more common in the European continent particularly favored in France and Netherlands.
5. Crawfish belong to the super family of Parastacoidea and Astacoidea while lobsters belong to the family to Nephropidae or Homaridae.
But comments say crawfish are cannibals too. These dont sound too yummy to eat and dont think I will be cooking any soon.
Peanut fumes may get me soon Tod! Gotta have more delivered before the weekend.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Hello all,
Tod, yea those gar scare the crap outta me lol. I told Rob the story you posted & he said yea, the get huge because they're lifespans are so long. And 100yrs ago, he said they got to be 18-19ft long yikes!
I think you have it stuck in your head about Rob being in jail lol, because you mentioned that once before. I always got nervous when he was using that he get busted buying that crap, but thankfully he never did. He was in a detox hospital before he went to rehab ( also 3wks before that too. )
Blue, I have 1 more tip, if ya don't mind. If you have any antique furniture that hasn't been refinished yet & retains its orginal finish, you may not want to paint it until you find out if the pc is valuable. If you're not sure, you could always post a pic & I'll let you know what time period it's from. A lot of mid century modern furniture ( 50's ) is worth more that more common Victorian, Eastlake & Mission oak pcs.
Interesting post on crawfish vs lobster. Rob would love talking to you lol. He's into anything history, nature, archeology, ect. We used to call crawfish crawdaddies. Why? I have no idea lol.
Clean, Charlie, Allfor, Happy, Butter ( & anyone else ) Happy hump day!
Tod, yea those gar scare the crap outta me lol. I told Rob the story you posted & he said yea, the get huge because they're lifespans are so long. And 100yrs ago, he said they got to be 18-19ft long yikes!
I think you have it stuck in your head about Rob being in jail lol, because you mentioned that once before. I always got nervous when he was using that he get busted buying that crap, but thankfully he never did. He was in a detox hospital before he went to rehab ( also 3wks before that too. )
Blue, I have 1 more tip, if ya don't mind. If you have any antique furniture that hasn't been refinished yet & retains its orginal finish, you may not want to paint it until you find out if the pc is valuable. If you're not sure, you could always post a pic & I'll let you know what time period it's from. A lot of mid century modern furniture ( 50's ) is worth more that more common Victorian, Eastlake & Mission oak pcs.
Interesting post on crawfish vs lobster. Rob would love talking to you lol. He's into anything history, nature, archeology, ect. We used to call crawfish crawdaddies. Why? I have no idea lol.
Clean, Charlie, Allfor, Happy, Butter ( & anyone else ) Happy hump day!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
Tbeit, I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Clean, are you feeling better today?
Such a busy day, morning was full and then my first meeting in my new position. I finally see I'm not the only one who doesn't know what they're doing lol!
Joint marriage session tomorrow. If I'm brave enough there's some things I need to bring up. Saying a lot of prayers for courage tonight.
Clean, are you feeling better today?
Such a busy day, morning was full and then my first meeting in my new position. I finally see I'm not the only one who doesn't know what they're doing lol!
Joint marriage session tomorrow. If I'm brave enough there's some things I need to bring up. Saying a lot of prayers for courage tonight.
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Originally Posted by PinkCloudsCharley 
Joint marriage session tomorrow. If I'm brave enough there's some things I need to bring up. Saying a lot of prayers for courage tonight.
I've learned to deal with worries and problems both ways! If I've done something wrong? I'll own up to it in a heartbeat! If someone else is making me miserable? I give it right back to them!
Like the saying goes: "Put the ball in their lap!" If someone hands you a problem? And it's not your problem? Turn the game around and give the ball(problem) back to them!
You and H are paying to see this Therapist! Use the time wisely! Don't hold back while your in there!
TOD
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
I don't hold back because of the counsellor, he's very good. I hold back because sometimes it's worse after than before I brought anything up. Sometimes it's easier to live with it than try to deal with it if that makes sense. Still some things will have to come up, I'm just not sure I'm strong or courageous enough to talk about them.
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Originally Posted by PinkCloudsCharley
I don't hold back because of the counsellor, he's very good. I hold back because sometimes it's worse after than before I brought anything up. Sometimes it's easier to live with it than try to deal with it if that makes sense. Still some things will have to come up, I'm just not sure I'm strong or courageous enough to talk about them.
Only going on theory here since I don't know the subject of what's needing to be talked about? Put your children between you and H! Well picture them there! Now! If the subject is in reference to keeping them safe and their wellbeing? As well as your own? Can you find the courage NOW to bring it out in the open?
If it's in reference to his leaving when things get heated? Can you find the courage to talk about it or do you want to continue living with the large ?
This is what I was talking about earlier! If you're letting things GO just because it's easier to live with it than discuss it? Apparently it's more to deal with than you want to deal with? Because you wouldn't be considering them if they weren't a problem? Give that problem right back to HIM! H and his alcohol is what's brought these things into your life! Push it right back into his lap and let him own up to it!
It's the same as with me and Jethro! Jethro and his pain pills are the reason we are having problems! I'm constantly handing the problem of his use right back to him! It's like yesterday when I was asking him what he planned on doing with the weedy spot where the oak tree used to be? I then asked: "Once I find those little trees growing we can transplant them in that hole!" He stood there looking all confused! I said: "You and those damned pills, you can't remember anything anymore!" Of course he got pizzy and started to walk out! I said: "Remember when it was cold and I was trying to find those little oak trees to show you where they are?" He stopped! "That's what I'm talking about, but you seem to always forget things!" He said: "Okay now I know what you're talking about!"
His problem of not remembering things is due to the pain pills he's popping! So I let him know all the time what they are doing to him/us! I'm handing the problem back to HIM!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
Hi everyone!
Tbeit so so sorry for your loss! Words can't even express the pain you must be feeling.
Today is the 4th anniversary of my Mom's death. She died in 2011 which happened to fall on the day before Mother's Day that year. I was pumped up on pills that entire time. My brother and nephew managed to find a connection in my home-town so we had an endless supply of them thru the funeral and that whole week we spent there. Needless to say...those pills kept me from mourning her death properly at that time. It wasn't until much later...that I came to terms with it...and maybe in some ways I haven't? Not sure? I'm still way too preoccupied with death so I don't think I've healed completely? I've made peace with her for not being the Mom that could be there for me, or helped me to grow as a separate woman, with confidence in myself. That part I've slowly come to terms with. But idk about anything else?
I will say I'm sad today. I might be a little quieter than usual too. Just bare with me...please.
Charley, still owe you a pm. So sorry...I've gotten behind.
Tbeit so so sorry for your loss! Words can't even express the pain you must be feeling.
Today is the 4th anniversary of my Mom's death. She died in 2011 which happened to fall on the day before Mother's Day that year. I was pumped up on pills that entire time. My brother and nephew managed to find a connection in my home-town so we had an endless supply of them thru the funeral and that whole week we spent there. Needless to say...those pills kept me from mourning her death properly at that time. It wasn't until much later...that I came to terms with it...and maybe in some ways I haven't? Not sure? I'm still way too preoccupied with death so I don't think I've healed completely? I've made peace with her for not being the Mom that could be there for me, or helped me to grow as a separate woman, with confidence in myself. That part I've slowly come to terms with. But idk about anything else?
I will say I'm sad today. I might be a little quieter than usual too. Just bare with me...please.
Charley, still owe you a pm. So sorry...I've gotten behind.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Good morning everyone,
Charlie, I gather from earlier posts & from your "don't rock the boat" demeanor that H has been verbally and emotionally abusive at times. I know from personal experience what this does to a person because I lived w/it for the 1st 28yrs of my life. It reduces a person to nothing. But,somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I had value. I finally left because I didn't want to live my life that way anymore & I didn't want my girls to grow up thinking it was okay to be abused & I didn't want my son to learn to abuse women. II don't know everything about your situation, so I'm not saying "leave." I just wanted you to know that I've been there & understand. Nothing's ever just black or white. There's a huge area of gray in between. But if he's verbally abusive a lot, plz don't let your precious children learn that behavior. I hope your counselling appt is productive today.
Tod, I hear ya loud n clear about the memory loss. Rob's memory was so bad on opiates that he would actually repeat himself 10min later. And I thought i had Alzheimer's last yr. I still have very bad long term memory, which I'm hoping will get better w/time. But, I have a horrible feeling that 10yrs of opiate & benzo use destroyed it. My short term memory has gotten much better though.
Clean, Blue, Allfor, Butter, Happy...looking forward to your posts. If I missed anyone, you too.
Charlie, I gather from earlier posts & from your "don't rock the boat" demeanor that H has been verbally and emotionally abusive at times. I know from personal experience what this does to a person because I lived w/it for the 1st 28yrs of my life. It reduces a person to nothing. But,somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I had value. I finally left because I didn't want to live my life that way anymore & I didn't want my girls to grow up thinking it was okay to be abused & I didn't want my son to learn to abuse women. II don't know everything about your situation, so I'm not saying "leave." I just wanted you to know that I've been there & understand. Nothing's ever just black or white. There's a huge area of gray in between. But if he's verbally abusive a lot, plz don't let your precious children learn that behavior. I hope your counselling appt is productive today.
Tod, I hear ya loud n clear about the memory loss. Rob's memory was so bad on opiates that he would actually repeat himself 10min later. And I thought i had Alzheimer's last yr. I still have very bad long term memory, which I'm hoping will get better w/time. But, I have a horrible feeling that 10yrs of opiate & benzo use destroyed it. My short term memory has gotten much better though.
Clean, Blue, Allfor, Butter, Happy...looking forward to your posts. If I missed anyone, you too.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
Clean I am so sorry. I remember my dad's passing finally now without tears, it'll be 12 years this month. Such huge hugs to you, my friend.
I don't know what your religious beliefs are, but I believe our loved ones never leave us. And they see us with clear loving eyes, which means they understand what hardships we were under at the time, and they see us with pure love and never blame us for what we weren't able to do.
Pm me if you would like... I'd love to hear all about your mom. Hugs hugs and more hugs.
I don't know what your religious beliefs are, but I believe our loved ones never leave us. And they see us with clear loving eyes, which means they understand what hardships we were under at the time, and they see us with pure love and never blame us for what we weren't able to do.
Pm me if you would like... I'd love to hear all about your mom. Hugs hugs and more hugs.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
So counseling today. It was hard. H-a-r-d. H had his appt for the first hour and then I joined for the second, and he had told the counselor everything that has happened since our last appt in March. I am happy for his honesty with the counselor.
H talked about how he feels like he is scum, worthless, nothing. Not that I make him feel that way, that he feels that way about himself. And so, when I say something, even the littlest thing like why didn't you take out the garbage, he internalizes it into him being such a horrible husband that he couldn't even be trusted enough to take out the garbage and then he gets upset.
That's a whole lot for me to carry, you know? The idea that anything I say, the most general thing, can be taken as a negative to his whole self worth. and he made it clear, it's not me doing that to him, it's him doing that to him.
So for now, I'm not bringing up anything.I need time to heal, to get back to being whoever I am, I don't even know anymore. I am not avoiding H but I need to let him get his head straight. He needs some time to figure out how to get some self worth back. I know that's why he drank but now he needs to fill that with positive things and he needs to do that on his own.
I'm babbling, maybe later i'll have my head on right and can speak better.
H talked about how he feels like he is scum, worthless, nothing. Not that I make him feel that way, that he feels that way about himself. And so, when I say something, even the littlest thing like why didn't you take out the garbage, he internalizes it into him being such a horrible husband that he couldn't even be trusted enough to take out the garbage and then he gets upset.
That's a whole lot for me to carry, you know? The idea that anything I say, the most general thing, can be taken as a negative to his whole self worth. and he made it clear, it's not me doing that to him, it's him doing that to him.
So for now, I'm not bringing up anything.I need time to heal, to get back to being whoever I am, I don't even know anymore. I am not avoiding H but I need to let him get his head straight. He needs some time to figure out how to get some self worth back. I know that's why he drank but now he needs to fill that with positive things and he needs to do that on his own.
I'm babbling, maybe later i'll have my head on right and can speak better.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,854
Hey ladies.
Clean, big giant ((hugs)). Im here if you want to talk or I will happily absorb your silence. Im sorry for your sadness today. I sure hope your mom can look down on you with a clear mind now and see what a great person you are. An excellent mom and wife, loyal friend, and someone who is strong in part because of her influence on your life.
Charley, its great your H was honest in the session before you got there. I feel like soo much of the negativity he feels is outside the alcohol and at the root of his problem because of his childhood and what life tnrew at him. Im praying for him to find courage to deal with it all.
Really happy you started on your new position. Its coming at the perfect time and will help you stay positively focused on life and moving forward, challenge your capabilities and help you gain confidence.
Hi Kz. Are you into vintage and antiques? I dont know a lot about those things so I will gladly take you up on your offer to look at pics if I find some good stuff at the flea market. I love going there. Sometimes I go with my mom and sis, and other times with Mr Blue. Its tough though. If you see something and you dont buy it on the spot it can be gone when you go back. I like to think things over before I buy anything, even nail polish! Haha. Last year my husbands grandfather gave him several boxes of old tools. He doesnt really use tools much so they have been sitting out by his toolbox. I started looking through there and was having a lot of fun. Like a few of them, old metal tools say they come from a Horseshoe company who made them. And all these little unique objects, some of them I pulled out. I want to make up a sort of treasure bowl full of tiny found objects as a conversation piece. I think it would be cool to stir through it and have people ask where something came from, what meaning it has.
Hi Allfor, there was a good article on spider webs vs cobwebs on the whats the difference site I mentioned yesterday. I will send it to you.
I was reading there a long time yesterday while at work.
Hi Tod!!
Hi Butter!
Tbeit, your welcome to join us and talk about anything you want.
Last night I made Mr Blue angry. It was actually based on fear so he wasnt really angry angry. I was cooking and needed an ingredient so I told him I was going to run out and would be back in 20 minutes. But then of course something happened. I got to the store, and left my phone in the car. Ran inside. Got my stuff, decided to get a couple things more. Went to the aisle to pick up some pet treats. There was this older man there, Id say 80 and he was using one of those motorized scooters. He was buying cases of pet food. He was having trouble reaching something so I offered to help. THEN he thanked me and started talking. Oh my gosh he was fascinating, but first he started out how his wife had passed away a year and a month ago, and one of the things she made him promise was he would take care of the pets and not send them away. He said it was hard and he was worried because he needed to have hip surgery. And he talked a long time about his wife. Told me he doesnt get out much, and told me all about these pets. Then he told me where he lived which is close to us. And started talking all about how it used to be, and people he knew who lived there, and this one man who still lives there and how he was a trainer of animals for movies and tv. How he had a lion, bears and all these animals. You know me, I was enthralled! But poor Mr Blue tried to call me after about 40 minutes then kept calling and I didnt have my phone. He was afraid I had got abducted. I guess I ended up talking to this man for like 45 minutes! And I knew I had to leave, but he was so happy to talk, and he was fascinating and really nice.
I was going to call Mr Blue as soon as I got to the car, but no need! He was in the parking lot. He said he saw me at the checkout so he didnt come in. He was really upset. So then we get home and I was telling him all of the stuff, and he finally couldnt help but laugh. He was saying how worried he had been and Im just hanging out with this senior citizen talking about the circus. (It wasnt the circus) But the good news, he figures this man was so smitten he will now leave me millions from his estate because he says this is how taken people become with me. (Yeah he said smitten, he was on a roll). Hahahaa
Clean, big giant ((hugs)). Im here if you want to talk or I will happily absorb your silence. Im sorry for your sadness today. I sure hope your mom can look down on you with a clear mind now and see what a great person you are. An excellent mom and wife, loyal friend, and someone who is strong in part because of her influence on your life.
Charley, its great your H was honest in the session before you got there. I feel like soo much of the negativity he feels is outside the alcohol and at the root of his problem because of his childhood and what life tnrew at him. Im praying for him to find courage to deal with it all.
Really happy you started on your new position. Its coming at the perfect time and will help you stay positively focused on life and moving forward, challenge your capabilities and help you gain confidence.
Hi Kz. Are you into vintage and antiques? I dont know a lot about those things so I will gladly take you up on your offer to look at pics if I find some good stuff at the flea market. I love going there. Sometimes I go with my mom and sis, and other times with Mr Blue. Its tough though. If you see something and you dont buy it on the spot it can be gone when you go back. I like to think things over before I buy anything, even nail polish! Haha. Last year my husbands grandfather gave him several boxes of old tools. He doesnt really use tools much so they have been sitting out by his toolbox. I started looking through there and was having a lot of fun. Like a few of them, old metal tools say they come from a Horseshoe company who made them. And all these little unique objects, some of them I pulled out. I want to make up a sort of treasure bowl full of tiny found objects as a conversation piece. I think it would be cool to stir through it and have people ask where something came from, what meaning it has.
Hi Allfor, there was a good article on spider webs vs cobwebs on the whats the difference site I mentioned yesterday. I will send it to you.
I was reading there a long time yesterday while at work.
Hi Tod!!
Hi Butter!
Tbeit, your welcome to join us and talk about anything you want.
Last night I made Mr Blue angry. It was actually based on fear so he wasnt really angry angry. I was cooking and needed an ingredient so I told him I was going to run out and would be back in 20 minutes. But then of course something happened. I got to the store, and left my phone in the car. Ran inside. Got my stuff, decided to get a couple things more. Went to the aisle to pick up some pet treats. There was this older man there, Id say 80 and he was using one of those motorized scooters. He was buying cases of pet food. He was having trouble reaching something so I offered to help. THEN he thanked me and started talking. Oh my gosh he was fascinating, but first he started out how his wife had passed away a year and a month ago, and one of the things she made him promise was he would take care of the pets and not send them away. He said it was hard and he was worried because he needed to have hip surgery. And he talked a long time about his wife. Told me he doesnt get out much, and told me all about these pets. Then he told me where he lived which is close to us. And started talking all about how it used to be, and people he knew who lived there, and this one man who still lives there and how he was a trainer of animals for movies and tv. How he had a lion, bears and all these animals. You know me, I was enthralled! But poor Mr Blue tried to call me after about 40 minutes then kept calling and I didnt have my phone. He was afraid I had got abducted. I guess I ended up talking to this man for like 45 minutes! And I knew I had to leave, but he was so happy to talk, and he was fascinating and really nice.
I was going to call Mr Blue as soon as I got to the car, but no need! He was in the parking lot. He said he saw me at the checkout so he didnt come in. He was really upset. So then we get home and I was telling him all of the stuff, and he finally couldnt help but laugh. He was saying how worried he had been and Im just hanging out with this senior citizen talking about the circus. (It wasnt the circus) But the good news, he figures this man was so smitten he will now leave me millions from his estate because he says this is how taken people become with me. (Yeah he said smitten, he was on a roll). Hahahaa
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
Oh Blue, I love that story! I can imagine how Mr Blue was feeling, and how sweet it was for him to come looking for you! And that dear old man, how wonderful you were able to just listen to him. I bet you made his whole week
- I owe you a pm, I will get to it, sorry
Clean, what Blue said, a thousand times over. I know that those who have gone before us now have clear and pure eyes and see us as we truly are, and how good we are inside despite all our hard journeys. They now see the true us. I hope you are able to feel some peace today, my friend.
Blue, what you said about H is the feeling I got from our session. I know he's been exhibiting things like this for a while, but I think he's finally put two and two together, that this is originating with him and he needs to do the work on that himself. It's so hard to hear him say those things about himself, but I know that he needs to acknowledge those feelings in order to fix them. Hopefully the next weeks until our next appointment will be better. He's got a long road ahead of him.
- I owe you a pm, I will get to it, sorry
Clean, what Blue said, a thousand times over. I know that those who have gone before us now have clear and pure eyes and see us as we truly are, and how good we are inside despite all our hard journeys. They now see the true us. I hope you are able to feel some peace today, my friend.
Blue, what you said about H is the feeling I got from our session. I know he's been exhibiting things like this for a while, but I think he's finally put two and two together, that this is originating with him and he needs to do the work on that himself. It's so hard to hear him say those things about himself, but I know that he needs to acknowledge those feelings in order to fix them. Hopefully the next weeks until our next appointment will be better. He's got a long road ahead of him.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
