Joe Nerv

I didn't buy the whole powerless thing for my entire first year sober. Didn't cause me to pick up a drink. I didn't believe a power greater than myself would restore me to sanity either. I did believe there was power in the universe greater than me, and I was desperate enough to call that power god, and I worked a 3rd step. The rest fell into place over time.

I didn't get caught up in a whole lot of what I agreed and didn't agree with in early sobriety. I was desperate and had no bone to pick with anyone. I was as honest, open minded and willing as I could possibly be. I tried everything whether I believed it or not. The things that didn't hold true for me, I had to be honest with myself about. I don't believe in the "musts" that some (very few actually) people throw into AA. The "Don't drink, go to meetings, keep an open mind and be willing" approach has gotten many people sober. You may have a change of heart about the rest, you may learn ways to incorporate it all into your understanding, and you may do none of that. You're still welcome in AA, and it will still work as a tool to help keep you sober.

Boleo

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-kind-god.html

2muchpain

Well said!!!!!!

PaperDolls

I got sober with AA and I do think it saved my life. There's a whole lot of stuff in the book that makes me squirm in my seat each time I read it. We Agnostics being one of them ..... at any rate, there are far fewer things today than there used to be.

My higher power is "not me" and I'm sober and happy and I like meetings. I'm not there to make friends or get their approval of my HP or recovery. I'm there to save my life.

I share my truth in meetings because maybe, somewhere out there, there's someone who will relate to what I have to say --- it's not opinion I'm spouting, it's my experience. Some may not like my experience. Good for them. I'm glad I don't have to be that person anymore.

There are lots of ideas, methods of working the steps, sponsorship, and experience that I hear talked about at meetings that are different than mine or that I don't understand or that I disagree with. I give them as much respect as I want to be given to mine.

miamifella

I attended meetings believing the ideals of the program though I found the practice problematic.

Even though I find parts of the program useful, I have been helped in my recovery by too many people to ever believe in the first step that we are all powerless and can only be helped by a higher power.

Still hearing people talk about their success in recovery can be helpful at times, so I do occasionally attend a meeting.

GwenCummings

Put so wonderfully well that i almost think I wrote this in a blackout!

pdoc

Just because it's not in the big book doesn't mean preaching as a technique/approach is not used by some at meetings.


Most of the hard core members at my meetings can't say a sentence without a quote from the BB This lack of originality is driving me away unfortunately.

WhiteFeathers

There is so much about AA that makes me bristle. I have tried to get past it, but I have finally had to just surrender (there's that word!) to the fact that I cannot dedicate every waking day to AA.

Meaning, really, that I don't want a sponsor (I can't stand having to call every day and let her know about every little thing I'm doing, where I'm going, etc.). I may or may not work the steps on my own in my own way. There are dozens of versions of the steps (you can find them online) that reflect many different perspectives (atheist, buddhist, etc... wiccan steps have 13!). One alternative version of Step 1 says "we admitted we could not control our drinking, nor do without it, that our lives had become unmanageable."

No talk of "powerlessness."

I will probably attend some meetings from time to time for the fellowship and I do (only sometimes) enjoy hearing everyone's stories and ESH. But I'm not really a joiner and I don't feel like I can "work the program" to the extent my sponsor wanted me to.

2muchpain

I totally agree with you. I go to meeting but nothing else. I've tried the sponsor thing and worked the 12 steps but it just didn't seem real to me, but I wonder why and what I might be missing. The religious part, and it's there no matter what people say, is a real problem for me. Believing in a higher power that is just yours in AA is just a myth, but nobody wants to admit that. It's a Christian organization with Christian beliefs. Not that is a bad thing at all. But if you have different beliefs, it can be a challenge. I don't believe in any organized religion, so it can be tough.

SineadOConnor

I'm sure tired of the AA 12 step program and its rigidity but I go for the fellowship and just possibly to help someone else in some fashion. I also have the desire to stop drinking but I'm finding it difficult to do so to be honest. I understand the 1-2-3 steps principles, but that is as far as it goes. The alcoholic brain keeps me from grasping that and I guess I'm more of a pantheist. It seems to fit better. Keeps me sober? Not yet.

fini

The alcoholic brain keeps me from grasping that and I guess I'm more of a pantheist. It seems to fit better. Keeps me sober? Not yet.

SineadOConnor,
what might help you, do you think?

SineadOConnor

Yes and I sure would appreciate that. Thanks.

anattaboy

I go to meetings sometimes. I have a sponsor. I am also a devout Atheist, a practicing Buddhist and a bit conservative politically. Mostly I'm human and so is everyone else. My higher powers are alcohol, judges and occasionally my wife but if I think and act rationally, there is no problem. I have also not been drunk since I quit drinking.......

dSober

I had to look up pantheist. Please take a look at the OP here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-infinity.html

This is God as I currently understand Him. The one that helped me do my 3rd step, do the rest of the steps and get sober, just recently, was very much like Him.

whalebelow

I put my head in a meeting at 28, saw the God stuff and didn't bother to hang around and see if I could do aa but not the God stuff, I saw god stuff, thought "fork" this and never gave it a second thought.

7 years later the God stuff was way less scary than the prospect of keeping on as I was.

I had arrived at Aa in the condition I was supposed to, whipped by booze and desperate enough to try anything.

dSober

It was lucky 7 for me too.

fastfocus

AA theres only one requirement

tradition 3

the desire to stop drinking

the rest of it will fall into place as and when, to suit your beleifs

good luck with your recovery

samseb5351

Do you have evidence for this?
Are you saying if I continue to attend AA with only a desire to not drink, things will fall into place. I would suggest here although the statistics are hard to find that the majority of people do exactly that and things don't fall into place.

desypete

i have some evidence for you

my own life story will that be proof enough for you and how aa turned my life around ? or do you require i have some sort of degree on the subject that i have learned at a school or something ?

but please dont take my word for it or my own story either as if you need more proof
then ask the millions of others aa has helped and turned there lives around for them

for 2 years i just shown up at meetings as it was the only place i had left that would put up with me

i didnt do the steps i just kept on coming back and i stayed sober because of it and as a result my life turned around
i got a job, i got my kids back out of socail services care, i became a single parent dad and working as well

not bad for a 24 /7 drunk
the beauty of it all was how i didnt wake up in police cells anymore after my drunken sprees
it must of saved the tax payer a fortune, and yet aa is out there to help anyone free of charge

so for me i have nothing but the highest praise for aa and how it helps anyone who wants it and has done for the last 80 odd years

now what sort of proof do you need ?

after the 2 years i had even grown and changed in my own thinking as the stuff i heard in the aa rooms washed over me
i ended up getting my sponsor and doing the steps which in turn freed me up from any sort of guild or shame that i had been carrying with me as you can well imagine i had huge guild and shame for losing my kids into the care system i hated myself for what i had become

today its been 10 years sober i still dont believe in a god but i do believe in the power of aa and the proof i need is to see all the other people who come around aa and they to are sober and living a better life than what they had before
of course bad times come along aa doesnt promise anyone that bad things will happen in life
when my son died my whole world ended but i never once needed a drink on it
before aa i would of drank on it as it would of been the perfect excuse

so like i say for me aa works but then i did have to lose it all first before that sadly many people do have to go down to that level
i just hope many people will not go down there as they dont have to

Fly N Buy

Attending AA meetings with reservations?

Many members of AA have A LOT of indecision when they first attend. Keep going back.......It hurts, then it works!

I didn't know they took reservations?? I also just showed up

fly